[Kharon97]

so my mom met this fellow and they've been with eachother for a few months and I guess theyre serious.
He doesnt like me. How i know that? Everytime he comes over he goes out of his way to insult my race (im adopted; im mixed with puerto rican on my moms side, not sure about the dad, we think hes egyptian)
any way, he says stuff like: speak "mexican" are you "gypsy" or will say stuff like " you sand people" etc... very ignorant.
when his kids come over he will do anything to not let them talk to me, and he never invites me to any if his social
at his house with his kids.

I know he doesnt like me. He likes my sister, so idk. im 18 if that helps. I cant wait to go to uni.

[Crypts_Of_The_Mind]

Originally Posted by Kharon97

so my mom met this fellow and they've been with eachother for a few months and I guess theyre serious.
He doesnt like me. How i know that? Everytime he comes over he goes out of his way to insult my race (im adopted; im mixed with puerto rican on my moms side, not sure about the dad, we think hes egyptian)
any way, he says stuff like: speak "mexican" are you "gypsy" or will say stuff like " you sand people" etc... very ignorant.
when his kids come over he will do anything to not let them talk to me, and he never invites me to any if his social
at his house with his kids.

I know he doesnt like me. He likes my sister, so idk. im 18 if that helps. I cant wait to go to uni.

I am 41 now, but when I was 14 - my dad re-married and it wasn't til they married that I figured out my new step family didn't like me very much. While they were dating, it was fine - but after the wedding it wasn't and dad didn't want to step in for me. So - in some ways I can relate to you and in other ways our situations are unique when compared to each other. I can tell you though- getting out on your own as soon as possible will likely be best for all involved - that's what I did. I don't mean by running away either. I mean by planning out how to move on into the next stage of your life and following through.

Do you want to go to college? Perhaps you can also make plans to stay in a dorm or a nearby apartment.

If you are not going to further your education - do you have a good paying job with good hours and benefits? If not- start looking, don't think you have to have "the best" when you start either. You can start out with 2 part time jobs if you need to, or one full time that pays small and has a few benefits and another part time ... Or a job you hate but pays well ... If any of those things happen, it's fine, that's part of being responsible for yourself - just keep searching out other jobs you may be happier with during your off hours. Again, those were things I had to do when I first started out (now I am on disability so I don't work at all).

Have you any idea where you will live? Have you looked at dorms? Looked around town, in papers, and online for apartments, mobile homes and houses for rent in your price range? Might a friend want to roommate with you so you can split the bills?

This is what I mean when I say to get out as soon as possible. It will allow you space to have the independence you need to live your life and for them to live theirs and for all of you to do so happily while still allowing for you to come together on occasion if you choose to do so. I also think you should talk to your mom when you can get her by herself about the way he makes you feel and why. Don't be accusatory or mean about it, but let her know and allow her to respond and then talk it through.

I hope that helps a bit?

[Thunder Bow]

He is trying to control you through bullying you. Stay away.

[healingme4me]

It's such a bummer when our parents keep the peace for their new partners and allow the casting away of their offspring.

Some good advice about moving on and gaining your independence.

As cliché of an expression, this isn't your fault. He sounds like he has the emotional maturity of a toddler and your mom is choosing to be hush about it. That's such a shame, yet all too often not uncommon.



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