[gunzel1963]

It is two years since the end of a relationship but even though I'm in a new relationship I still spend many hours per day thinking about my ex and our relationship. It really is time to stop thinking about her so much but I can't help it, my thoughts continually return to her, any suggestions to stop this thinking?

[Thunder Bow]

Your mind is associating your new relationship with the old one. You fear the new one would be like the old one, or not as good as the old one was. Watching your anxiety will help you control this.

[WhatDayIsItAgain]

Could you be recalling details (nice and not nice types) from the old relationship in an effort to somehow protect or evaluate the new relationship? Perhaps letting go is harder because you just tend to be a very loyal person and you are now reviewing and letting go just a little slower than is comfortable? Of course, that could be totally wrong but I thought I would suggest it as a possibility.

One can't compare apples to oranges

[SilverNeurotic]

Did you get sufficient closure from your last relationship?

[avlady]

yes closure is very important as i suffer this condition myself.

[Artchic528]

I often had found myself comparing my first ex with my second ex. I would often think, "if only my second ex did this like my first ex did" or vice versa. It was always a thought process that was going on in my mind. Maybe I didn't get closure from my first relationship like I wanted, or maybe it was because the first relationship was the first time I was romantically intimate with a guy. They say you never forget your first time, and I surely haven't.

I was given the suggestion that maybe I was just in love with the memory of that relationship and how it impacted me. Such pleasant emotions and experiences tend to stick with us for a long, long time. Perhaps you're just in love with the memories from that past relationship? If so, just know that it ended for a reason and you have a new love interest in your life now. Maybe use the wisdom gained from that previous relationship, what worked and what didn't, to help foster a better relationship with the girl you're with now. Just a suggestion.

I hope you can find peace and move on with your life.