A whole lotta doubts

Hope this is the right place to post this...

I always feel like I'm "faking" my mental illnesses and that I'm just overreacting and that it isn't important and that I'm lying to myself.

I feel like I'm just trying to latch onto potential mental illnesses / mental disorders to "feel special" even though that's completely outside of personality and this is a contributing factor for me to put off getting tested/screened for things.

I'm not sure how much this makes sense, but maybe I could get some pointers on how to deal with this feeling?

This was also a bit of a rant because I needed to get this off my chest even though there were threads with similar themes that I could've searched through

Thanks for reading this

I think it's called Imposter Syndrome, but I've felt like that too. Then I look at all the bottles of pills and realize it's not fake. It's real for my friends, too. They know when something's up.

Hello Marco: The General Q & A forum is a fine place to post this thread. The only thing about the General Q & A forum is that things tend to move quickly here & posts may not get the attention here they might get in some of the other forums. Also, the fact that there are other threads with similar themes doesn't matter. Over time, most concerns get visited & re-visited many times over.

Actually what you wrote makes perfect sense to me. Although I've been kicking around the mental health system for going on 20 years now, I've never received a formal diagnosis. I suppose there's something written down somewhere for insurance purposes. But that's about it. I guess there's something to be said for not being "painted" with a label, so to speak. On the other hand, it has left me wondering what all of my struggles were actually about & if it can actually be said that I was truly mentally ill... or was I just a "bad seed".

I presume the best solution to this dilemma would be to get some form of psychological testing done. I haven't ever had it. But I would imagine that is the closest one can get to a firm answer to the questions: "Do I have a mental illness?" & "Assuming I do, what is it?" Otherwise you're just sort-of left floundering in the dark. And if floundering in the dark is okay with a person then that's fine too. But if not then getting some kind of psych testing done would seem to me to be the way to go.

Very good way of putting it. I sometimes wonder if people think I am faking it though. Still the fact that those closest to me take a genuine interest in my mental health tells me that it is real. Monitoring/documenting my mood changes makes it pretty evident it's real too.

Mental heath issues seem to face much accusation. Do not accuse yourself when you feel the need for healing and knowledge.

With regard to mental health issues, it's easy to feel like what we're experiencing isn't real, or is 'fake.' I believe this is because we can't 'see' mental illness like we can a broken leg (for example). It's easy for me to believe my mental illness isn't real - until I drop down or stop meds...then I get slammed with how very real my mental illness is.