does this count as sexual abuse

Hi im new here. I joined because i have been plagued by certain memories i have from when i was younger. When i was around 3 years i was sexually abused by a family friend. They say you cant hav memories from before 6 years but this memory is very clear in my mind. Later wen i was around 6 years old i had a neighbor and a cousin who would kiss me on the mouth n undress me, they were the same age as me. I dont know if i initiated the contact but i remember always feeling guilty because i felt it was my fault and because i actively participated. Is this considered as sexual abuse? Am i the abuser?

Who says we can't have memories before age 6? I have memories from the age of 2.

No, you were not the abuser...you were just acting out what had been done to you. Children tend to repeat what they've been taught.

I don't think it counts as sexual abuse..

Do you see a therapist?

Generally speaking abuse is committed either by a child old enough to understand the effects their actions can have on another. Children's brain chemistry is not fully structured in a way to be able to make decisions based on long term effects. The longest they generally think of is "what will i get for christmas/birthday/report card?" or be concerned "uh oh mom and dad know i lied - now what will they do?" Beyond those kinds of things, they don't really consider. You may have known it to be "wrong" - but you were experimenting. It's something a lot of kids do innocently, trying to figure out why girls are different than boys and how each part works. It's what people have termed "playing doctor". It's not encouraged, but it's innocent - unless sex play comes into it, then questions start arising as to how the child learned about that. The child still is not to blame though. The adults are. Generally, it is encouraged for parents to sit down with their children and explain all these things and answer any questions when they start exhibiting curiosity, to prevent these kinds of problematic emotions later, as well as problems between parents and confusion between the children.

The kissing - that was sexual abuse and not your fault.

Kissing of the adult I meanh

The family friend did commit sexual abuse on a minor. You were abused by him.

What the adult did was sexual abuse. What two children do who know no better is not.

I agree that you can remember things that happened before you were 6, and I also agree that what the adult did was sexual abuse. The stuff with kids your own age would not be considered abuse; curiosity about other children's "parts" is normal as is wanting to see/undressing. However, if that second memory bothers you, it is something that you might want to address in therapy, journaling, prayer, symbolic things or however you choose to deal with icky stuff from your past.