I was thinking if there is something that makes me wake up every morning and makes me to actively live my life as I am embracing it instead of dragging myself or as if life dragging me, but couldn't find one thing, not even a hope in the future. What does make you keep going in life?

[Skeezyks]

Well... this is an interesting question. I guess I'd have to say it's my wife. She has no one but me, as I have no one but her. On the other hand, I've made two serious bids so far to end my life. And the fact that my wife would have been left alone didn't stop me either of those times. So I don't know.

To some extent I think it has to do with opportunity. Realistically I'm not capable to doing something violent to myself & I don't have enough pills stored up anymore to do the job. So, in a sense, it's just easier to keep going than it is to try to arrange an exit. Fortunately for me, I'm an older person. So I probably don't have all that many years left to trudge through anyway. And in the meantime, I pursue a spiritual practice that buoys me as well, although I don't believe in any kind of life after death. So I'm not doing it in an effort to get to some kind of heaven. For me it's simply a way of coping from one day to the next.

The fear of dying. With the exception of when I am depressed, that fear is enough to make me live life to its fullest. I really can say I live the best I can. I did the trip to Disneyland I always wanted to do, got a bunch of tattoos, dyed my hair blue, got some piercings, took up pole dancing, took my kids on a week long solo camping trip (I have bad anxiety), so on and so on. All in the last couple years. My parents were 5 and 8 years older than me (I'm in my 30's) when they died. I want to make every minute count.

When I'm depressed I get out of bed for my kids and anyone else counting on me.

[leejosepho]

Curiosity...kind of like wanting to see the entire movie just to be certain I do not miss anything.

[reb569]

Helping my daughter, my pets. That's about it.

[gayleggg]

My daughter and dogs keep me going. I don't know what I would do without them.

[avlady]

My husband and son who put up with my #$@!. They keep me alive although i find life is hard for me. I wish i had more money too to take the edge off of being poor.

My passions and my love for new technology and video games are the only reason why I don't kill myself right now.

Without my passions, I am merely an empty shell who's incapable of feeling anything but sorrow and anger.

[Crypts_Of_The_Mind]

I guess I don't have any true reason.
It used to be because my dogs needed me and the possibility of one day meeting my son. Now I have seen my dogs can survive without me and my son doesn't want to meet me. The only reason I am here is because it simply is not time for my life to be over.

Originally Posted by Crypts_Of_The_Mind

I guess I don't have any true reason.
It used to be because my dogs needed me and the possibility of one day meeting my son. Now I have seen my dogs can survive without me and my son doesn't want to meet me. The only reason I am here is because it simply is not time for my life to be over.

That is just plain cold of your son.

Sometimes, I think communists had the right idea where they would force people to respect their parent's/elders then I think about what I had to deal with regarding my own mother and I'm glad I'm an anarchist hahaha

I feel for you, I really do

[it'sgrowtime]

I suppose it's the senses, especially vision. I love to worship nature, and watch it grow. I love art and architecture. Composition keeps me interested in life. I like to see how all the pieces of life (can) fit. When I haven't been happy, I still feared death and consequences. When I didn't fear death, my children/husband kept me going. My children motivate me to be a healthy role model, otherwise I might not care enough about myself? Not sure.

Coffee makes me look forward to morning. The seasons keep me interested in the year. I always have a project I'm working on..I leave projects one step unfinished so I always have something to go back and do.

Words are very important to me too. Either a single word or a catch phrase keeps me going. Words have power. Writing/reading keeps me going. Learning new vocabulary. Etc etc. These days, expressing myself vocally is the challenge that keeps me going.

[Crypts_Of_The_Mind]

Originally Posted by DarknessIsMyFriend

That is just plain cold of your son.

Sometimes, I think communists had the right idea where they would force people to respect their parent's/elders then I think about what I had to deal with regarding my own mother and I'm glad I'm an anarchist hahaha

I feel for you, I really do

I don't know what he does or does not or thinks he knows about me though either. He may think I gave him up because I didn't want him or he was an inconvenience when neither was the truth. He may think I never loved him - I love him with all my heart even to this day and have ever since the first time I heard his heart beating. He may know that I have no job due to disability per psychiatric reasons but not what those reasons are exactly and therefore be afraid of meeting me. There's a lot of variables. I only know he doesn't want to meet me because when I found and reached out to him on Facebook, he refused to allow me as a friend.

[BlueEyedMama]

What keeps me going is the love for my Husband and family. I have almost died a few times from complications of my physical illnesses and each time was eye opening to me. It is kinda of surreal to have your last rites read to you and yet you survive. Twice. It simply isn't my time as of yet and I appreciate the extra time with my loved ones.

[Turtle_Rider]

1. My turtles.
2. I afraid of death, even through I think about suicide sometimes. Not really sure, maybe I still have will to survive. Not mention in religion it is considered as big sin.
3. Reading or thinking about those who have more unfortunate life than me, such as ISIS victims, those who struggling to get food, victim of sexual abuse, orphans, etc. It makes me feel more lucky in life.