Is it ethical for my counselor to invite me to church w/her?

My therapist knows I'm spiritual and invited me to her church when she attends. I'm not sure if this is okay? I have a history of needing to learn better boundaries too. Any feedback would be helpful.

This is NOT professional at all. I once had a psychiatrist who was taken before the board of the college of physicians and surgeons for unprofessional conduct. One of the things she was guilty of was evangelising and promoting church. This is definitely a no-go.

Years ago the therapist I was seeing at the time called and invited me to church with her,even offered to pick me up and take me.I told her no thanks.

The next session I was told I am "satanic".She was very offended that I didn't go and used it against me and really judged me for it.

I reported her and stopped seeing her,this was just one of many things she did.

No,it's not ok for her to invite you.

No way is it okay. Professional would be saying "Sometimes people find spirituality of some kind to be comforting". Inviting you into her social life is crossing boundaries

Ugh, no. Just no.

here in america it depends on situation... example one time when my therapy discussion was on religion my therapist did invite me to attend church services at the same church that she attends and also provide the transportation. I went, we sat together in the same pew incase the service triggered me in any way and then afterwards she gave me a ride home again.

here in america this is perfectly fine thing to do, we checked out the legalities before hand. what it boils down to is any public event like attending church, schools and so on is appropriate for treatment providers and their clients to attend together, or separate and just happen to run into each other outside the therapy room. it happens naturally.

what cant happen is if therapist and client are attending the same public event the therapist can not say to someone else ... this is my client so and so. or bring up anything that is covered by confidentiality.

here in NY there are many small towns and cities where treatment providers do attend the same public events as their clients. heck I went to high school with one of my past treatment providers.

in normal life its normal to be attending the same events as someone else a person knows and be told about this church or that one and be invited to attend. they just have to keep that professional line of confidentiality whether its a teacher inviting students to attend a public event or a doctor or a therapist. or if they happen to run into each other out in the public.

Hello PennyLane, no it is not professional or good for boundaries. Therapy needs to be about therapy and you. Mixing outside of therapy is not what therapy is about. Therapy is about you going to a professional about your issues, religious issues can be talked about in therapy if you need but a therapist needs to keep it in session.

Nope, not ethical at all. Not only is your T crossing boundaries, but she is also promoting her church/ religion. So she is double unethical.

It's sad when therapists become the abusers. It gives me less faith in psychotherapy.

I’m not sure this is the same thing, but my job coach and I went to the same church. He was telling the people at church that he works with me. Which I guess isn’t that bad. Then at my vocationial meetings at the clinic I go to, he was telling the other people in the meeting that we go to the same church.

It didn’t really bother me, but I do wonder if he was somehow breaking confidentially.

Sorry about that double post.

I’m not sure this is the same thing, but my job coach and I went to the same church. He was telling the people at church that he works with me. Which I guess isn’t that bad. Then at my vocationial meetings at the clinic I go to, he was telling the other people in the meeting that we go to the same church.

It didn’t really bother me, but I do wonder if he was somehow breaking confidentially.

I just read above about it being legal.

Personally, eh, I just don't know how I would feel about an invite from a therapist while in treatment. I kind of get it. I've family and some friends that I know are more than excited to welcome newcomers into their Churches. It does become one big blended family which appeals to many. And it's a well meaning gesture. I also know that in my own place of employment, recruitment is off limits. I don't work in this field of therapy, so I cannot speak to it.

If boundary setting is what's needed, I'm sure, too, that too decline is no harm, no foul.

Absolutely incorrect. In no way should a professional even put a client/patient in the position of making a choice. This has nothing to do with the patient's boundaries and everything to do with the ethical professionalism of the care provider.

So you are saying as long as it's a public event and as long as the therapist doesn't disclose that it's his/her client,it's ok and legal? What about a concert?A bar or club?What if it's a satanic church?

Seems to me that a T inviting a client to go anywhere with them would be crossing boundaries.

It may be legal but most would consider it highly unethical.

No need to bite my head off. I don't envy the position. I mention boundary as it's already happened. The OP has already been put into that position. The law was also already defined by amandalouise.

yes it is legal and ethical to all of the above. the treatment provider just has to prove how and why they are doing it.

for example there was a time when I was questioning my religious beliefs during therapy sessions.. my treatment provider got permission from her supervisor and the agency governing mental health treatment providers in my location to research various religions in the area, attend services with me. we had a very hard time finding a satanic based church because they are pretty much gone now in NY state. But we eventually found a satanic sect. they did nothing different than any other religions other than who their higher power was. I found out an interesting fact about this religion in that they have to follow the state and city/ town laws in which they practice. so Alot of what I read about in preparing for my therapist and I attending their service turned out to be no longer done nationwide because the old ways are now illegal. they would not be a church if they continued to practice the illegal activities of the past.

to a bar or club it was actually my idea that my treatment provider go to a bar or club with me. at the time I had an alternate personality that took control only during bar hopping and clubbing. We needed to get some issues taken care of with this alternate personality that we could not get cleared up any other way.

when we checked with her supervisor and the agency that governs treatment providers in my location both said yes. we had some limits such as since it was therapy work we could not drink any alcoholic beverages and uphold the same standards as being in therapy at the office.

concert sure, one of my past therapists went with me to a school concert in my home town because I was afraid of running into my one of my abusers.

you have to understand something...in many towns in NY state the person you grew up with as your best friend went out of town to college, became a treatment provider and then returned to the small town to be that towns treatment provider. when its a professional thing where the treatment provider is inviting the client to an event because the client has a problem they need to work out around that event, they know how to stay with in their profession during that time. they also know how to keep work out of their off duty time too.

Oh,I see.What you're talking about is doing these things as a part of therapy work,right?

That's a little different I think than what the rest of us are talking about in this thread.

It also makes a difference if it is intended as a one off event, not to be repeated more than once [or possibly a few times], or the beginning of a new social relationship outside of the therapists office. In the latter case it is unethical. The patient is just being used to satisfy a religious calling on the part of the therapist.

Holy cow, I just reread my post and what a whammy it is. Boy did I ever pounce. You have every right to judge me for that and I apologise for my tone. I still feel the same way but my delivery was entirely out of line. I am sorry I caught you up in something so emotionally charged for me.

Accepted. I chalked it up to it's that time of the year. :\

I actually get why so impassioned. Those that know me well know my personal experience. The last time I ever said anything on PC about it, I was harshly told openly that maybe it's me. Sooooo.....that being said, I still believe it can be turned into a teachable boundary moment. If I were asked, I would say that as an adult I chose the path of having my head annointed in oil and don't choose to wash that off with water.

I don't see why not. After all, the patient-professional relationship often gets closer the more you respond to your therapist's success in treating you, but after hours when she is off-duty, if she feels her spirituality could benefit you, then I say go for it.

One of my first therapists was also involved in dressage horseback riding & our city was forming a new dressage club. My trainer took me & my T was there. We talked about it in T after that & she said no problem goibg & doing the same things we just cant talk therapy or acknowledge each other as T/client but we can just know each other....its ok.

Since then I left there & moved alone to an awesome small town & have an awesome new psycholigist who is just amazing. I was doing a ballroom dance waltz performance with my dance group last December. I invited friends & my psychologist because I had been talking about ut so much. I never expected her come out that night but she was there. Many in town know her because it is a small town & her husband is a professor at the college in that town. She came just to be a support & to see what I was doing. We didnt talk therapy or acknowledge each other as T/client but I did introduce her to my friends as a friend. It made me really feel good that she cared enough to go out of her way to do that. She knew I have no family & a few close friends so the support for a performance was so appreciated.

I think every situation is its own as to whether appropriate or not. For some it wouldnt be for others its fine.

In a small town everyone knows everyone else anyway so its not as easy to keep things that anonomous, but I love my small town life after living in Los Angeles all 54 years of my life till I moved here 10 years ago.

I feel if you and your counsellor share simaliar faiths and it's been discussed as to how you both feel, i don't see it ethically wrong. I would find it very offensive if the counsellor forced there faith on me knowing i do not share. Also every State, province, country has different ethics and boundaries therapist and counsellors follow.