[Nike007]

I’m not really sure where to put this one... But I guess I want to ask is “is it bad/wrong to not relate to family, or not really care for them?” Like, I care about them not getting hurt or something, but I don’t feel a deep love or connection to them. It feels like we’re acquaintances.

I always see my friends say stuff like “oh I call my parents every day” or “sorry I have family things going on” (all the time though). It seems like I’m the only one who really doesn’t do family. I did have a friend in high school who didn’t like her family either, but it made sense, as her mom is in jail and her dad has anger issues. But for me, my parents haven’t done something like that. My parents got divorced when I was younger and my mom has said many harmful things to me. Now, I just don’t really care for them I guess. The people I long for have their families and don’t care for me like I care for them. I want to talk to them all the time and be with them often but they can’t and wouldn’t want to. I feel empty and lonely all the time.

I just feel abnormal...

[benzenering]

My parents invited themselves to my house for Christmas dinner. Haven't seen them in a couple of years, but I do try to call just out of duty every couple of months. I really don't like them (especially my dad). We just don't relate...different views on, well, everything! It was a very long day and I was very glad when they left.

[bpforever1]

hmmm, I have the opposite problem where my family treats me like a distant relative or acquaintance. I always have tried to communicate with my family no matter how nutty they are. It's just my nature, I guess. I call quite frequently and for this my mother tells me all, I mean, ALL of her problems leaving me with not much to say. She does not listen to my problems but I still feel the need to listen to her. I must say I care for them all although they are at times mean and spiteful towards me. I will always care for them. At times they show compassion for me but it's a very rare situation but they do. So, I cling to these memories and experiences and try to forget their idiosyncrasies and accept them as my family. It is sad but like you said others really don't have the time to listen and care for others with problems. Thus, I try to keep communication with my nutty family. They are all I have.

[Thunder Bow]

No, you are not abnormal. Feeling differently would be abnormal. Best to just understand them, and not judge them.

[pegasus]

No it's not bad or wrong in how you feel. Feelings are not something you can change and for many of us there are good reasons for not getting along with other family members. Some people claim to have wonderful family relationships, don't let that make you feel bad, nobody has the perfect relationship all the time. It is what it is.

[Nike007]

Originally Posted by Thunder Bow

No, you are not abnormal. Feeling differently would be abnormal. Best to just understand them, and not judge them.

What do you mean by understand them?

[Nike007]

Originally Posted by pegasus

No it's not bad or wrong in how you feel. Feelings are not something you can change and for many of us there are good reasons for not getting along with other family members. Some people claim to have wonderful family relationships, don't let that make you feel bad, nobody has the perfect relationship all the time. It is what it is.

I don’t really know. I mainly just want to feel like I have someone to care for and who feels the same way but I don’t feel like I do.

I feel ashamed for my feelings because other people always say that family is family and you have to care for them and all. I feel like I can’t trust my family and they stress me a lot.

[Thunder Bow]

Understanding means being objective, without any judgment. Just see them as being Human.