[jvklaus]

Hello,

I hope there are some who are able to help me understand the differences between a mentally ill mind and non-mentally ill mind. It is becoming more important to me than ever that I understand normalcy. I understand the term 'normal' is rather abstract, but I have to know what *it* is.

I have schizophrenia, anxiety, night terrors, depression, and obsessive thinking. Really everything falls under the broader term schizophrenia, but I want to be precise. I have lived with these things my entire life. My first psychiatric assessment was at age seven. In my late 20s, and now into my early 30s, things have gotten much worse.

After several in-patient hospitalizations, 18 courses of electro-convulsive therapy, and changes in my medication profile, I feel different. I am more stable than before, but there are still periods that aren't good. The main thing is, my mind is quieter. I don't hear the voices anymore, and I don't know if that is normal or not. Because I don't hear them anymore, I find myself doing mental math, like squares and times tables. I don't know if this is normal. I repeat gestures with my thumb and fingers, counting in patterns. I don't know if this is normal. I still have racing thoughts, and doing these things helps to ease them. I feel different, but I don't know if it's 'normal.' Finally, even though I guess things are better, I want to go back - stop taking my medications, and hear the voices again. It's weird. Without them, I feel alone. I don't know if this is normal.

So, my hope is that someone can help me understand where I am right now. Am I experiencing normalcy? How do I know if these different feelings I have are the feelings I am supposed to have?

[healingme4me]

I am posting this article from the Psych Central archives, I hope it helps.

https://psychcentral.com/blog/what-i...mental-health/

[jvklaus]

[QUOTE=healingme4me;6104157]I am posting this article from the Psych Central archives, I hope it helps.


Thank you for sharing this. It helps add clarity to defining good mental health. I still have questions, but I am not certain how to express them. I wish I could feel the experience of someone else with good mental health and then compare it to my own experiences.

[*Laurie*]

I dunno, but I do know that I feel much more comfortable around people who have a mental illness than I do around (cough*cough) normal people.

[Thunder Bow]

What is "Normal"?

Who knows what normal is—you sound like you’re in distress. I’m sure there’s an adjustment period, but check in with your doc and therapist.

I know I’ve seen people post about ECT—try posting under the forum for your diagnosis or maybe under treatments.

[MrMoose]

That’s a great question because it’s impossible to answer. I don’t have voices, but I have memories and thoughts and problems I mull over and think about in my head. I will say that changing from the way I am now into thinking a different way would be scary to me, so I understand the alarm in your post. And yes, being alone and quiet can be lonely and empty ... but it can also be peaceful and rich as well. The only thing I would suggest you avoid is falling into the trap of thinking that anybody else on this planet has this figured out either.

[jvklaus]

Originally Posted by MrMoose

That’s a great question because it’s impossible to answer. I don’t have voices, but I have memories and thoughts and problems I mull over and think about in my head. I will say that changing from the way I am now into thinking a different way would be scary to me, so I understand the alarm in your post. And yes, being alone and quiet can be lonely and empty ... but it can also be peaceful and rich as well. The only thing I would suggest you avoid is falling into the trap of thinking that anybody else on this planet has this figured out either.

Thank you for your post. I was talking to sister yesterday, and she offered the same concern as you, to avoid falling into a trap of thinking that others have figured it out. I have a tendency to obsess over things once I get fixated on something. She says that I won't find an actual answer, but I might find understanding. I hope I find that here.

Thanks again.

[whitecrosses]

Your post made me feel less alone in my old and new "ticks" and overall schizophrenia and reality distortions.i hope you continue to improve. I know what you mean also about not exactly wanting the voices to disappear. that's "normal" I believe thanks.

[jvklaus]

Originally Posted by whitecrosses

Your post made me feel less alone in my old and new "ticks" and overall schizophrenia and reality distortions.i hope you continue to improve. I know what you mean also about not exactly wanting the voices to disappear. that's "normal" I believe thanks.

Thank you for responding. It is a relief to know that I am not alone in these feelings. It helps a great deal, thank you.

[SeekerSeeking]

My car license is: YBNORMAL (why be normal?)

Another is YBAVRAGE (why be average?)

I don't know what normal is--and evidently it is not me. I have always thought outside the box--what diagnosis fits this? We are all different--with different strengths and weaknesses.

I once met a guy who had a medical bracelet that said he was schizophrenic. I asked him how that came about. He said one week-end when his folks were out of town (he was in his early 20s) a UFO landed in his back yard. (He lived in a rural area). He couldn't remember if they 'took' him or not. But he talked about the sighting of the UFO a lot. His folks took him to a hospital--and he was diagnosed--and medicated. Later, in life he stopped the meds, did fine, and never talked about the UFO again.

Was he schzophrenic or had a UFO landed in his back yard? I don't know and remain open to both.

I think normal, in my world, is operating in a fashion by which you can life your life, interact with others, and continue to build your life and grow.

Abnormal, would be anything that would hinder one living their life in a worthwhile fashion.

But I could be wrong...