[lu1535]

With standard counseling protocol in mind, who decides when it's time to start weaning off of therapy, the therapist or patient? Thanks

[Travelinglady]

Hello, lu, and welcome to Psych Central! I've had a therapist tell me it's time and the other times I've left for various reasons. I suggest you bring this topic up to your therapist, since ideally it's a mutual decision.

Again, welcome. Make yourself at home!

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by lu1535

With standard counseling protocol in mind, who decides when it's time to start weaning off of therapy, the therapist or patient? Thanks

here in the USA therapy is just like any other thing every american can decide for their self if they want to be in therapy, with who and why. We can even see therapist after therapist after therapist just like we have the freedom to make a decision as to which medical doctors we want to see, for how long and move on to another medical doctor if we choose to.

in other words americans are not limited on how long they can be in therapy and with who. its a personal choice.

that said some insurance plans do limit how often and who they are willing to pay for.

if insurance wont pay then its up to each person to decide whether they want to continue and pay out of their own pockets.

my suggestion is if ..........you..........feel you want to be in therapy then contact your insurance plans they will tell you which treatment providers are listed on your plans.

this way if you feel you still need therapy after a treatment provider has dropped you, you will know who to contact and set up with next.

[ShadowGX]

I too have experienced both sides of it. If it concerns you then you can always ask your therapist about this as Travelinglady suggested you do. If you prefer one way or the other I'm sure they'll work with you on it too.

[eskielover]

I really like how it works with my T. I had 2 years of intense DBT therapy with her then we worked on ittegrating my past into my present. She went into private practice while my life was fairly going well wirhout stuff I needed to share.....but as the divorce is progressing it helps to have appointments with her once a month because there is just details I don't want to weigh down my friends with but it is good to have input & feedback on. So until this next phase of my life is through will keep going. She said she is there for what I need as long as I need her. She is the most awesome T I have ever had....we connect & she she coaches & encourages & also reminds me of the DBT skills I learned & applying them to situations I am dealing with or says good use of the DBT you learned. Nice to be at this stage with my T.....took a lot if work on my part to get here but well worth it.

[WishfulThinker66]

If you haven't already discussed it with your therapist I would set aside time to discuss the goals of therapy. What do you wish to achieve and what will it look like when that happens. While we don't have a time frame in mind my t and I do have an idea of what a success will look like.

[lu1535]

Thank you all for responding. With past therapies, I was the one who decided when I felt I ready to discontinue so imagine my surprise when my recent therapist said it was time for me to move on. My jaw dropped. She said I had reached my goals for coming in but the problem with that is during the process of reaching those goals more trauma was uncovered and, in my mind, my goals updated. As I walked to my car that day all I heard was my little girl inside my head yelling “but I have more to say”. I felt betrayed, angry, sad, and lost. This therapist and I had really connected and I was feeling more whole than I ever had. We did spend a couple sessions discussing my feelings about this and she said I could come back anytime, she would always be there for me but in my mind the moment was gone. My trust was gone. She said that my life appeared to be just about perfect so why would I want to rock the boat. I didn’t think that was an appropriate comment so my paranoid demon woke up and I started wondering if she had an agenda. I guess what I am hoping to gain from this post is some validation that I’m not crazy, that what I am feeling is real. I am still very angry because I felt I was gaining momentum but the flow was interrupted. I’m also very sad, I feel betrayed by this woman who I felt very connected to and who was really helping. I realize that you are only hearing one side of the story. You know, probably just getting this out of my head is all I need to move on, that’s usually how it works, so thank you all very much for listening.

[eskielover]

You are right.....goals are fluid as more things are brought to awareness or experienced after first goals were set. I am sure there were things you haven't processed that take having a good T to help you.

You are the one that knows what is left inside that still needs processing....things your T is probably not aware of & makes that perfect view she seems to have.....NOT perfect in reality.

When I got back into therapy after I left my bad marriage & moved so far away I never envisioned a time I wouldn't be in therapy. It us good to have it when we really need it. If I hadn't processed what I had with her before she went into private practice I would have felt totally unfinished too even though they ALL mentioned how far I had come from when I started....but personally feeling that & just being told are 2 different things & how we feel IS IMPORTANT to ending therapy.....NOT how they feel.

[Taylor27]

Hugs that was wrong for her to tell you that, no wonder you feel so betrayed. There are other therapist out there who are more then willing to help you. So sorry your trust got broken thats not right. I too got hurt by a counsellor too.

[amandalouise]

just wanted to add... sometimes mental health agency rules are that when a person enters therapy they build a treatment plan with goals and when those goals are completed therapy is considered done..............unless........ the therapist and client review the past goals and set new ones. if no new ones are set then therapy is considered done. the client and therapist wind down and pick a completion date (some places call this closure where the client and therapist say their good byes and no more sessions are scheduled.)

my suggestion is if you want to continue seeing your therapist ask to review your goals, check off the ones completed and set new ones. that way as the old ones are completed new ones are added and therapy continues as needed.