[RoxanneToto]

I’m keeping mine secret from my parents, or mum at least, because when I split with my ex I mentioned wanting to try therapy because I’d felt like something was wrong with me, and she basically shamed me out of going, saying I’d been leading him on, etc, if I felt bad it was my own fault and that I’d hurt him. This coming from someone who took me to see a psychiatrist with no prior discussion when I was a teenager (her cover story was that it was ‘follow up from speech and language therapist’... ok, sounds plausible, but I’d seen that person in middle school at the latest. I was in college by this time. That’s a LONG time to wait before checking up on a client!).

Only the last bit of criticism she threw at me over my break up was true; he was hurt, and I was sorry for that, but she has no real idea how I feel inside romantic relationships. I thought it would be different that time, but no. I was struggling to make things work and just hoping my awful feelings would eventually subside (emotional numbness, panic attacks, gaslighting myself etc) until I just couldn’t do it any more. I never explained it in depth to her because I feared she would try to invalidate what I was saying. I do love her in my own way, but beginning to realise she maybe doesn’t have my back 100%.
My sister in law knows I’m having sessions, though, and she is supportive, which I’m grateful for.
Lastly, I’m starting to wish I had started therapy back then in spite of what mum said. Current T has been great so far, but I regret that it took me this long to try and do anything about my issues.

not anymore they don't.

partly because I don't talk to them anymore, partly because when they did I never had one for long as they threatened her

[RoxanneToto]

I’m sorry to hear that, raging vortex. That was way out of line of them. I hope things are going better for you now, though.

[jeremiahgirl]

No I’m an adult and don’t need their input.

[MickeyCheeky]

Sorry that you've been through that. My Parents have always been aware of it since they have been the ones paying for it. i am REALLY happy that you're seeing a therapist now! Sending many Safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @RoxanneToto, your Family, your Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!

[Mountaindewed]

My mom knows because I live with her and am dependent on her. My therapist and my mom even talk on the phone or through email sometimes about me when an issue comes up.

My therapist calls my mom “mom” when she’s talking to me. I don’t mind it but it’s kinda like “um. I’m almost 28 years old why are you treating me like a kid?”

[mountainstream]

I do not need the input of a ''parent''....
They were not parents to me...

[Taylor27]

No they don't believe in therapy. I think it's best that they don't know plus im a adult

[LuvsHorses]

My immediate family are all deceased, but I have some cousins and my bio niece on my facebook. I have been upfront about what's happened in the past few weeks and that I have a referral for therapy. I made light of it by saying that if anyone calls me a psycho, they can kiss my butt. Nobody said anything negative and, in fact, I've had a lot of support. One cousin has been in therapy for decades, she's very supportive.

[divine1966]

I don’t currently see a therapist but when I did, I told my brother because topic came up. Of course my daughter knows because she periodically saw therapists too. I don’t recall if I told my parents, they’d not care either way, they don’t have an opinion on such things. My husband tried to convince my brother to see a bereavement therapist when our mom died. He tried the same with my stepdaughters when their mom died. He is a firm believer in therapy

Some people aren’t up to it themselves but they don’t have opinion on if other people see therapists. I’ve been independent since age 19 so I don’t see why my family would have an opinion on me seeing whoever I want to be seeing, not like they pay for it

[Mountaindewed]

My new therapist has asked twice if she can call and talk with my mom. I told her I just wanted things to be between us.

[divine1966]

Originally Posted by Mountaindewed

My new therapist has asked twice if she can call and talk with my mom. I told her I just wanted things to be between us.

Unless she is your legal guardian or maybe if you are in danger, it’s weird she wants to call her.

[AliceKate]

I've told basically everyone. Except my work. My father is not at all a believer in therapy, but I was admitted to the hospital for a desease I did not have that can be life threatening, which was caused by my psychological issues. So he tolerates it. Besides, it's not his place to say I can't go...

[RoxanneToto]

Originally Posted by Mountaindewed

My new therapist has asked twice if she can call and talk with my mom. I told her I just wanted things to be between us.

My therapist has joked about potential scenarios where she would be meeting my mum (e.g. helping me move my stuff out if I found my own place - she said “she wouldn’t know who the hell I was” and laughed) but she isn’t serious and I don’t think I’d want that anyway, although I think they’d get along just fine if they did meet. It’s just all the questions I’d get that I’d rather avoid!
I agree though, that unless there’s some kind of issue going on your mum needs to know about, for some reason, new therapist doesn’t need to involve her.

[Soupe du jour]

I'm sorry you've been shamed about needing a therapist. Do try to ignore that. The shaming is based on ignorance and/or stigma, but that is usually a learned behavior.

My main family members all know I see a therapist. I have a significant mental illness with a rough history, so it's sort of a mandatory thing for me. I suppose there could come a time when I stop seeing one for a while, or at least cut down a lot. But that's not now.

[RoxanneToto]

Thank you, Soupe du jour, and it’s good to know where her reaction came from. I hope you have enough support for yourself
In my mum’s case, I think it was mostly ignorance, maybe a little stigma, and not being able to tell her what was really going on because I felt she’d just dismiss me, like she often does (also I didn’t understand my own feelings - even if she was more understanding I might not have been able to explain - I was in a relationship that looked good to everyone on the outside, nothing was obviously wrong but I felt like hell!)

[eskielover]

Only family I have is my daughter half way across the country. She knows about the wonderful psychologist I have had since moving here because she helped me heal & that helped me have a better relationship with my daughter.