Is anyone familiar with maladaptive daydreaming?

Hi, Is anyone familiar with maladaptive daydreaming?

Please share what you know. I can't stop doing it, It has increased to be intrusive and distracts me from worse thoughts I guess, but itself is not helpful or good for me.

Hi, @Jelzig65! I have always been a daydreamer, too. One of the social groups here at the forums is "#daydreamers." Maybe you'd like to join it? I'm a member, along with 19 other people. You could post your thoughts about daydreaming there, where other daydreamers show up & read from time to time. About daydreaming being maladaptive, it surely might be at times, like when we're supposed to be paying attention to important things. I think I do pay attention to what I'm doing when it's important. But other than that, I see my daydreaming as a blessing, & feel lucky to have this creative ability that has helped me all my life. Would you like to chat about your daydreaming on this thread a little bit? It's very interesting to me.

Hi, I’ve copied a post off another forum, called Childhood emotional neglect, and it is almost me and what I go through, the author of this post was anonymous . I go around in mind loops of constant scene setting in my mind and its not calming soothing, but it is distracting. It is stressful and gives me great anxiety, but I cant stop.
Here is the post of another poster on another board but feel its close to my issue

*****
Hey all 👋 I don't think this needs a trigger warning.

I don't know if I've made a post about this ever, even though it's been an issue for a long time. I wondered if anyone else struggles with intense crushes that become obsessive? Like logically, I don't want these men, for the most part I barely know them, if at all. I try to stop, but I am so lonely and I've got so much responsibility, and it's hard to stop thinking about them even when I should. My self control is limited.

I'll hear they're seeing someone, and it doesn't stop anyway. I never make a move, I've gone through this for so long I can act completely normal face to face, and don't stalk them or anything like that. I can function through it. But it's painful. Does anyone else go through this? Does anyone know any mantras or actual good ways to distract myself?

*To tie this to CEN, this started in my relationship with my ex husband, who I've since realized was severely neglectful, just like in my childhood.

I didn't get these crushes when I was with my last ex, maybe because he responded to me more.

*******
Similar in some ways, and with variants.
I could elaborate on another thread.
This maladaptive daydreaming is not comforting as some may experience, it is me trying to find ways and sorting through emotions and cravings of connection.
Thanks for reading

I am a maladaptive daydreamer. I mostly think in conversations. Like, I imagine the other person's part. I also have violent fantasies, but they are intrusive and I generally push them away. These are the most maladaptive thoughts I have, the rest, I can accept.

I'm not sure how to get rid of the habit. I guess I would have to have more irl relationships, but one of the ways I deal with contact to another person is specifically by daydreaming conversations and going over past conversations. Daydreaming is kind of an integral part of a relationship to me. If I don't have the time to process that way, I get overwhelmed and overloaded.

Not sure what to tell you, but I hope that helped in some way. Personally, I'm not working to get rid of the daydreaming, I just work to replace the severely maladaptive parts.

Yes, I experienced it in the past in a concerning way. I wrote a little about my experience on my blog a long while back, but not the most personal details as my blog was read by people I know. In fact, I moved 50 % of my blog posts to a different and new blog. Perhaps I can write more someday as the new blog is more anonymous. Find my post at Obsessive or maladaptive daydreaming easing back into grounded creative thinking | My Journeys Beyond Bipolar Disorder

I have been a daydreamer all of my life, too. I don't know whether it's completely maladaptive or not, however. I'm usually able to turn it off at will. I realized it was getting the better of me at a fairly young age, and trained myself in my teens to focus my attention to tasks at hand more mindfully.

I do still fall into it when the stress becomes too much.

I do know I have it because I'm a creative type; and it has helped me in the past to unlock new ways of looking at things. And real life (let's be honest!) can be exceedingly tedious and boring. But I also know that I developed it as a coping mechanism, because there was so much childhood emotional neglect in our home. Daydreaming was an escape from all of the confusion and stress and sorrow.

It's about finding that balance between the blessing and the curse aspect of it. Not allowing any ONE THING, one habit, to have complete control over me has always been my conclusion, as that would be maladaptive, for sure.

That's a very good point. I agree, a person should have more than one coping strategy and yes, it really gets a problem when it intrudes so much on a life that one can't function. I don't mean 'function' in the eyes of society, but function in our own eyes.

Daydreaming can be like anything that in moderation is good, but in excess not. It can be like a coping skill that turns bad...a positive coping skill that turns negative.

A helpful comparison chart:



I have found since Covid hit that it's easier for me to slide into maladaptive dd for stretches at a time. But then, there's the looming reality that, if I don't do it, it won't get done...in other words, I can't stay at it too long. And that's been good for me, because I was deeply ensconced in maladaptive dd for a long stretch, through the worst of my depression. And literally, nothing that I wanted to accomplish was getting done.

It appears there are lots of people this affects, and there is also a fair amount of help out there to assist a person looking to change things up.

Maladaptive Daydreaming: Symptoms, Treatments, & How to Cope

MuseumGhost, thanks so much for the info. Very interesting stuff!

I majored in psychology in college, and I've been in therapy since the age of 16 which was literally decades ago, and I read extensively in psychology, so I have NO IDEA why I'd never heard of Maladaptive Daydreaming until a few days ago. Maybe it's something to do with how spaced-out I get?!

I've been doing this since I was a child. I never knew it was a "thing", I thought it was just something I did. Part of my overall weirdness lol. So when I first heard about this thing a few days ago it kind of freaked me out. And for some reason I've been really upset ever since. I don't really feel "validated" at all, I feel like somebody's gotten into my head or invaded my privacy or something. Because this is something I never ever shared with anyone, including a long line of therapists.

I know why I do it. My own life is one long disappointment. I never really liked being me, I'd far rather be someone else. I've tried doing practical things to make my life more satisfactory, but somehow it always blew up in my face and only made things worse. So I decided to stick to the fantasy, since it's better than reality

IMHO, reality is seriously overrated!

I guess I'm just weird.

I have done that myself only I would pace back in forth :hug eventually it causes my family to get frustrated with me. I still maladaptive just not as much as used to.

where do you find this social group for daydreamers? Do you have a link?

It's here...
https://mysupportforums.org/groups/-daydreamers.html
...but unfortunately it hasn't been very active lately.

for the link.

Lots Of