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Member
Member Since May 2009
Location: Ohio
Posts: 314
15 5 hugs
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Dec 26, 2009 at 08:13 AM
#1
I don't do windows because ... I love birds and don't want one to run into a clean window and get hurt.
I don't wax floors because ... I am terrified a guest will slip, hurt themselves, I'll feel terrible and they may sue me. I don't mind the dust bunnies because .. They are very good company, I have named most of them, and they agree with everything I say. I don't disturb cobwebs because ... I want every creature to have a home of their own. I don't Spring Clean because .. I love all the seasons and don't want the others to get jealous. I don't pull weeds in the garden because ... I don't want to get in God's way, he is an excellent designer. I don't do gourmet meals when I entertain because ... I don't want my guests to stress out over what to make when they invite me over for dinner. I don't iron because ... I choose to believe them when they say "Permanent Press". I don't stress much on anything because ... "A Type" personalities die young and I want to stick around and become a wrinkled up crusty ol' man!!!! Add some more! |
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 Catherine2, Elysium, Indie'sOK, pegasus, thunderbear, VickiesPath, ZilchHour
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Member
Member Since Dec 2009
Location: coldest place on earth!
Posts: 47
14 |
Dec 26, 2009 at 11:12 AM
#2
I love this one...thank you!
I clean houses for a living, but this still cracked me up! __________________  K
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Member
Member Since Nov 2007
Location: New Hampshire
Posts: 145
16 2 hugs
given |
Dec 26, 2009 at 11:17 AM
#3
I don't clean out the fridge- I'm a scientist and am waiting to see what I can culture!
(I am surfing right now to avoid the holiday dishes) |
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modelcarguy, VickiesPath
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Legendary
Member Since Aug 2007
Location: West of Tampa Bay, East of the Gulf of Mexico
Posts: 14,352
(SuperPoster!)
17 1,021 hugs
given 
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Dec 26, 2009 at 01:09 PM
#4
My favorite smart-aleck wall hanging:
"I cleaned last week. Sorry you missed it." |
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modelcarguy, VickiesPath
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Member
Member Since Nov 2007
Location: New Hampshire
Posts: 145
16 2 hugs
given |
Dec 26, 2009 at 01:40 PM
#5
If you have come to visit me- WELCOME. If you have come to see my house, please give on months notice.
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ECHOES, modelcarguy, VickiesPath
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Where the HELL are we?
Member Since Mar 2009
Location: So Cal
Posts: 3,342
15 29 hugs
given
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Dec 27, 2009 at 12:35 AM
#6
My Fav....
If you don't want cat/dog hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture!! 
__________________ |
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ECHOES, fearfulfrog, JayS, katheryn, modelcarguy, VickiesPath
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Poohbah
Member Since May 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,017
15
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Dec 27, 2009 at 01:28 AM
#7
Quote:
__________________   Cuteness, guaranteed to put a smile on your face. ____________Visit my albums____________
Painted animal Wallpapers http://forums.psychcentral.com/album.php?albumid=603 Fantasy Art http://forums.psychcentral.com/album.php?albumid=585 Roses http://forums.psychcentral.com/album.php?albumid=387 Cats http://forums.psychcentral.com/album.php?albumid=672 My DX is schizophrenia and my meds are - Clozapine |
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fearfulfrog
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Magnate
Member Since Jul 2009
Location: Phoenix, AZ, USA
Posts: 2,779
15 6 hugs
given |
Dec 27, 2009 at 11:58 AM
#8
My two favorites:
My mother had a little doll with a sign on it that said: "Housework makes you ugly." And the other: "Around here, dog and cat fur are considered condiments." __________________  Vickie
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ECHOES, imachikinlol, Indie'sOK, modelcarguy
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jun 2009
Location: Michigan
Posts: 3,584
15
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Dec 27, 2009 at 05:55 PM
#9
I love the sign that says "home is where the cat hair sticks to everything BUT the cat"
My aunt has this hanging in her house.
__________________ Only you can prevent neurotypical jerkiness!
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ECHOES, fearfulfrog, modelcarguy, VickiesPath
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who reads this, anyway?
Member Since Oct 2006
Location: Appalachia
Posts: 9,968
18
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Dec 31, 2009 at 09:22 PM
#10
Don't cook. Don't clean. No man will ever make love to a woman because she waxed the linoleum - "My God, the floor's immaculate. Lie down, you hot b**ch."
~ Joan Rivers __________________ The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well. anonymous |
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fearfulfrog, modelcarguy
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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