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#1
May 24, 2005, 01:02 PM
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1. SAVE THE WHALES. COLLECT THE WHOLE SET.
2. A DAY WITHOUT SUNSHINE IS LIKE, NIGHT. 3. ON THE OTHER HAND, YOU HAVE DIFFERENT FINGERS. 4. I JUST GOT LOST IN THOUGHT. IT WASN'T FAMILIAR TERRITORY. 5. 42.7 PERCENT OF ALL STATISTICS ARE MADE UP ON THE SPOT. 6. 99 PERCENT OF LAWYERS GIVE THE REST A BAD NAME. 7. I FEEL LIKE I'M DIAGONALLY PARKED IN A PARALLEL UNIVERSE. 8. HONK IF YOU LOVE PEACE AND QUIET. 9. REMEMBER, HALF THE PEOPLE YOU KNOW ARE BELOW AVERAGE. 10. HE WHO LAUGHS LAST, THINKS SLOWEST. 11. DEPRESSION IS MERELY ANGER WITHOUT ENTHUSIASM. 12. THE EARLY BIRD MAY GET THE WORM, BUT THE SECOND MOUSE GETS THE CHEESE. 13. I DRIVE WAY TOO FAST TO WORRY ABOUT CHOLESTEROL. 14. SUPPORT BACTERIA. THEY'RE THE ONLY CULTURE SOME PEOPLE HAVE. 15. MONDAY IS AN AWFUL WAY TO SPEND 1/7 OF YOUR WEEK. 16. A CLEAR CONSCIENCE IS USUALLY THE SIGN OF A BAD MEMORY. 17. CHANGE IS INEVITABLE, EXCEPT FROM VENDING MACHINES. 18. GET A NEW CAR FOR YOUR SPOUSE. IT'LL BE A GREAT TRADE! 19. PLAN TO BE SPONTANEOUS TOMORROW. 20. ALWAYS TRY TO BE MODEST, AND BE PROUD OF IT! 21. IF YOU THINK NOBODY CARES, TRY MISSING A COUPLE OF PAYMENTS. 22. HOW MANY OF YOU BELIEVE IN PSYCHO-KINESIS? RAISE MY HAND. 23. OK, SO WHAT'S THE SPEED OF DARK? 24. HOW DO YOU TELL WHEN YOU'RE OUT OF INVISIBLE INK? 25. IF EVERYTHING SEEMS TO BE GOING WELL, YOU HAVE OBVIOUSLY OVERLOOKED SOMETHING. 26. WHEN EVERYTHING IS COMING YOUR WAY, YOU'RE IN THE WRONG LANE. 27. HARD WORK PAYS OFF IN THE FUTURE. LAZINESS PAYS OFF NOW. 28. EVERYONE HAS A PHOTOGRAPHIC MEMORY. SOME JUST DO NOT HAVE FILM. 29. IF BARBIE IS SO POPULAR, WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BUY HER FRIENDS? 30. HOW MUCH DEEPER WOULD THE OCEAN BE WITHOUT SPONGES? 31. EAGLES MAY SOAR, BUT WEASELS DO NOT GET SUCKED INTO JET ENGINES. 32. WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU GET SCARED HALF TO DEATH TWICE? 33. I USED TO HAVE AN OPEN MIND BUT MY BRAINS KEPT FALLING OUT. 34. I COULDN'T REPAIR YOUR BRAKES, SO I MADE YOUR HORN LOUDER. 35. WHY DO PSYCHICS HAVE TO ASK YOU FOR YOUR NAME? 36. INSIDE EVERY OLDER PERSON IS A YOUNGER PERSON WONDERING WHAT HAPPENED 37. JUST REMEMBER - IF THE WORLD DID NOT SUCK, WE WOULD ALL FALL OFF. 38. LIGHT TRAVELS FASTER THAN SOUND, WHICH IS WHY SOME PEOPLE APPEAR BRIGHT UNTIL YOU HEAR THEM SPEAK.
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Psalm 119:105 Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path. |
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#2
May 25, 2005, 01:56 AM
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lmao! Where did you get that from?
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#3
May 25, 2005, 07:16 PM
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ty september
 i really needed these now...</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font> 29. IF BARBIE IS SO POPULAR, WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BUY HER FRIENDS? </div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> 
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#4
May 26, 2005, 09:17 PM
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ROFL!!!!
Thanks! Jan
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I still dream and I still hope, therefore I can take what comes today. Jan is in Lothlorien reading 'neath a mallorn tree. My avatar and signature were created for my use only and may not be copied or used by anyone else. |
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#5
May 30, 2005, 09:29 PM
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Loved this!
My favorite: 20. ALWAYS TRY TO BE MODEST, AND BE PROUD OF IT! Still smiling! |
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#6
Jun 09, 2005, 09:51 AM
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MY FAV # 12!!!!!!!!
HA HA HA
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Live life passionately, love unconditionally. Hope for the best, laugh your heart out. Cry when you need to, learn from the past. And remember what is meant to be will find its way. |
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#7
Apr 08, 2007, 05:05 AM
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Bump!
Thanks SeptemberMorn, loved this.   
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I know that behind every grey cloud there is a silver lining; I just need to be patient enough to find it!!! |
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#8
Apr 08, 2007, 07:11 AM
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Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm! Ha! Ha! Very good!Thanks Septy! 
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 Pegasus Got a quick question related to mental health or a treatment? Ask it here General Q&A Forum “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by it's ability to climb a tree, it will live it's whole life believing that it is stupid.” - Albert Einstein |
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#9
Apr 08, 2007, 09:45 AM
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What a great way to start the day - with a good laugh.
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#10
Apr 08, 2007, 10:01 AM
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How Clever!!! TY, TY, TY!!!
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#11
Apr 08, 2007, 11:14 AM
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 i loved it !
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"I live to dream and dream to live." |
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#12
Apr 08, 2007, 04:36 PM
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O-ho 38. LIGHT TRAVELS FASTER THAN SOUND, WHICH IS WHY SOME PEOPLE APPEAR BRIGHT UNTIL YOU HEAR THEM SPEAK.
Good one!
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W.Rose   ~~~~~ “The individual who is always adjusted is one who does not develop himself...” (Dabrowski, Kawczak, & Piechowski, 1970) “Man’s mind, once stretched by a new idea, never regains its original dimensions.” (Oliver Wendell Holms, Sr.) |
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#13
Apr 08, 2007, 04:59 PM
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I'm going to borrow this if you don't mind 
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#14
Apr 08, 2007, 08:47 PM
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99% of lawyers give the rest (1%) a bad name
gotta send that to my good lawyer
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#15
Apr 08, 2007, 09:36 PM
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I had forgotten about this post! I saw "zen" and my name before it and I thought... "Someone's posting under my name!!"
Irish, thanks for giving me my laugh back!
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Psalm 119:105 Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path. |
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