Should the moderately well-off be ashamed?

If you work hard, perservere, are honest, respect yourself and others, you WILL be successful, and SHOULD be proud of it. Still, we may want to be a little sensitive about others who perhaps haven't accomplished as much, and maybe have less "material rewards". Keep in mind that there are also many people who are quite successful, in their own way, but simply are not materialistic. I admire these people, but I suspect that they are not ones who would be jealous of another's' success.

We have every right to be proud of our accomplishments, and material things are just a way of keeping score. But we should be careful not to wear our success like a badge, to flash in the face of those who may have accomplished less. Be humble, and find inoffensive ways to help them accomplish more.

Thanks to all who've posted. You've given me something to think about.

Several years ago the program I work for got a new contract with the state with an increase in funding. I got my first raise in eight years as a result. I shared the news with a couple of friends who work for the same agency, but have a different funding source. I didn't rub their faces in it. I told them to share my happy news. Ever since one of them has repeatedly made comments about the "big bucks" I make. side note - even with the raise I make near the bottom of the income range for my profession.

A couple of months ago the friend started in again about my "big bucks." I finally told her that her comments hurt. I wasn't ugly about it. I told her in an even tone that her comments hurt and asked that if she can't be happy for me to please stop making hurtful comments. She's still mad at me.

I wish I'd never said anything in the first place. I've worked hard to be where I am professionally. I went back to college and earned a Master's degree. She has a Bachelor's. I am licensed in my profession. I've worked for the agency 11+ years. And I'm dammed good at what I do.

I come from a different perspective. I too have had depression since elementary school and bullying all throughout my life. I've learned how to overcome it on my own, even when I'm feeling full-blown depression in the moment. I can't let it control my life and I work hard to keep it in check. So perhaps it doesn't work for you, but it does work for me.

Q. Should the moderately well off be ashamed?

A. Only if they've intentionally exploited and/or harmed others to get there!

Of course people who exploit and harm others aren't going to feel guilty or ashamed anyhow, and most likely wouldn't even think of pondering this question in the first place.

Therefore, I think it's pretty safe to say that it's okay for you to enjoy the comforts you've achieved without feeling any guilt and/or shame about it!

I can think of plenty examples in my life where success was certainly not the end result of that.

Well it would certainly be nice to have the option to let it or not let it...at will, but nowhere close to that.

One of my absolutely best friends is very well off. In the category of never has to work a day in her life because of inherited wealth. She is the kindest, most generous and genuine person I know, and there is nothing she would not do to help out others, be it in terms of money or in terms of just being there for somebody. And yes she has a gardener, yes she has help in the house, but really, do people know that she invites the people working for her to her parties, and makes it a point to know their children and make sure they are ok? (She helped pay for college for her housekeepers son). But I know of people who speak badly of her out of envy. They only know the facade, the pretty white woman with money. They do not know her. In my book, the people who are envious of others because of material wealth are the ones who needs to be ashamed. I think they are the most materialistic of all.