outright request for hugs

Just saw this, Liz.

Tons of hugs and great energy in your direction.

Am really really impressed with your plan of action. That's some cool thinking under pressure! Kuidos!

xo,

Chyia, fingers/toes/eyes crossed

My entire team is freaked out.

The observer went on a home visit with one of my co-workers. To me "observing" means you sit and watch and keep your mouth shut. The observer kept butting in and saying things to the client that had nothing to do with the reason the counselor was there. At one point she asked to hold the baby and got up and walked around the house with it. That all seems odd to me.

Personally, I cycle from freaking out and stressing to telling myself I have a plan and need to just follow through with it and chill out. I calm down for awhile then freak out again.

What none of the rest of my team knows is that this person already did her observations with a couple of other programs in the agency. Then she and her boss met with the person in charge of those programs and ripped her a new one. That person was so upset she turned in her resignation. She told someone I know that she will not treat her staff the way she was being told to treat them and she refuses to micromanage her staff. Lord only knows what's going to happen after she observes us.

That sounds horrible. ((((((Liz)))))

HUGS

((((lizardlady)))) Hope it gets better

I am so sorry Liz

Sounds like a perfectly normal reaction to the extended stress you're living with at work Is there anyone (you completely trust) at work that you can talk to about it? An HR person?

I've spoken with other people on my team, including my supervisor. He is as freaked as the rest of us. I trust no one higher than my supervisor in the chain of command. Going to HR would be a major mistake. This used to be a great agency to work for. The focus was on helping clients. We got new senior management three years ago. The focus now is on the almighty dollar. Senior management gets lavished with perks (CEO is provided with a Mercedes to drive) while front line staff gets shat upon. CEO attended our staff meeting a few months ago and told us we work for a non-profit so don't expect to ever get a raise. I don't do this job for the money, but some honest appreciation of what we do would be nice.

I'm telling myself that my emotional turmoil is a typical reaction to what's going on. I'm doing my best to feel whatever I'm feeling without letting it slide into complete panic mode. Frankly, at this point I just wish it was over, even if the outcome stinks. At least it would be over and I could make plans to move on. The great unknown is unsettling.

Even if it's over & nothing drastic (as in loss of job ) happens will you really want to tolerate their way of doing business? At this point though I understand only having a few years until retirement.

Sounds like a horrible company to be working for now.....hoping nothing changes & you can slide by without their micromanaging forced on you.

Eskie, I really don't like the direction the new management is taking the agency. I keep asking myself it I want to work for a place that puts more value on money than helping people. I'm hoping I can just hang on until retirement.

I have some concerns about looking for another position. I'm 63 years old. Am not sure many places would be interested in hiring me at my age. Plus, what I hear through the grapevine is that work conditions at other agencies are just as ugly. With things just as bad at other agencies I would be jumping from one frying pan to a different frying pan.

At my age I have no interest in trying to open my own practice. I'm squirreling money away for retirement now. If I went out on my own there's a good chance I'd end up burning through my savings while I built the practice.

One redeeming factor about my particular position with the agency is that I work, geographically, at a distance from the corporate office. So far, the further away you are the less attention they pay to you. I'm hoping I can fly under the radar until it's time to retire.

Speaking or retirement, I'm also looking at what I have in savings and am wondering if I can live off savings until I can draw full retirement at 66. Am also considering if I can live on savings and lower social security if I am forced out of the agency before full retirement age.

I discussed this with my pdoc yesterday. Have I mentioned I love my pdoc? Not in a romantic way, but because he is so damn good at what he does. He was outraged about the changes going on. We talked about how unprofessional the "observer's" behavior was last week when she was with my co-worker. We both agreed that I'm having a pretty typical reaction to what's happening. None of my bad old coping skills are kicking in. I'm using healthy coping skills. Depression and anxiety are under control.

He had an interesting perspective as I described what's been going on. He said it made him think of the grief process, that I'm grieving how the agency used to be (focused on helping kids). I laughed and said I think I'm stuck in the anger phase. I'm going to think about what he said though. I know how to grieve in a healthy way. I've certainly had enough practice. Maybe it will help me dope.

I think your pdoc is correct about the grieving process being a big part of the feelings you are experiencing. Loss of the GOOD way they used to be with the caring.

Isn't it an amazing feel to observe self & see the change in reaction to things now than in the past. Healthy skills REALLY DO WORK. They don't change what we are going through but they sure change how we are going THROUGH it.

Sounds like you have many options possible if something were to happen. I agree, if flying under the radar is possible that's the best option....otherwise your plan B & C sound good too. That makes it easier to deal with knowing there are other good workable options available.

Hi, liz, I've been out of town and away from my computer, so I'll just say, after a brief perusal of your situation, that I hope things will get better soon.