[PreciousQueen]

What can I do to make this better? It should be promoting my gym classes and coaches.

My name is ..... I have been training in jiu jitsu with Coach Craig for about 3 months now. Like anyone else can, I had my doubts when staring out. I thought I was too small, too weak or too slow. But as I kept coming things got better with practice and a lot of help.

You never can predict when something is going to happen to you. It was a normal Friday night. I was waiting for a friend to come so we could hang out. It would take a bit, so I walked to a bar I usually hang out at. It was part of my comfort zone. I've gone out with my It wasnwas that long before he came up saying "you're cute". It was a nice conversation with him , but I did notice that he was not drinking anything and I was on drink 3. He kept encouraging me to finish his drink. I stared texting my friend to see where she was and if she could help me with a distraction. I a perfect world, she would have shown up and we woul both leave.
That didn't happen. He started getting handsy and get TOO close. On a Friday night, that's not entirely noticeable not abnormal. He didn't take the five times that I said no as an indication that he should stop tryin to kiss me. I didn't notice his hand around my waist bewas focusing on him NOT kissing me. It was when he had his arms pulling me closer that everything that o had been practicing during classes suddenly snapped into mind. Ty didn't take that long to be able to get him into an arm bar.
That was enough to get him I stop and for people to finally react. Basically all I go was "I did not expect that from someone as tiny as you."
Because of the efforts of the other people in class and coaches, I had that night and nights leading up till now to return home to my family and the sad thing is that all I could ever do is say thank you.

[Crypts_Of_The_Mind]

What is it you would have liked to have done instead of just "saying thank you"?

[childofchaos831]

Maybe mention something about how martial arts can be beneficial for any size person with any level of experience and physical ability. Early on, like you said, it seems hard, but with practice and perseverance, anyone can use martial arts.

Also, my experience with karate was that it was more inner work and learning self control than fighting, i.e. katas. The skills help in a lot of situations, and like you said, it only took an arm bar for him to back off. You didn't have to all out attack. He just needed to see you weren't defenseless.

Are you able to assemble this as the facts instead of like a story? I believe doing so would further your cause.

[PreciousQueen]

Originally Posted by Crypts_Of_The_Mind

What is it you would have liked to have done instead of just "saying thank you"?

Nothing really because I just want to go to the gym.

[PreciousQueen]

Originally Posted by justafriend306

Are you able to assemble this as the facts instead of like a story? I believe doing so would further your cause.

Well, I could but it wouldn't be a personal testimony and it'll sound less authentic if I'm giving things straight from the gym. I don't work there and all the gm said was tell what happened. It's literally what she's doing. I get random people coming up asking/ telling me the same thing.

I still think this ought to be as professional as possible. I am serious about doing so being of benefit to you. Can you get help from someone with an administrative background or knowledge of legalese to assist you? Perhaps there is someone with such knowledge here that can volunteer to help you.

Okay, so I hope you are not offended but I took the time to draft up a template that might work. If it is of no use to you that is all right. Perhaps others might have their own ideas on how to tweek your statement.

==================================
Attention: XXXXXXXXXXXXX
Re: THE MATTER OF XXXXXXXXXXX
Reference(s):[list here any coversations you had regarding the event]

Please accept this correspondence as testimony regarding the subject matter having occured on or about [time] at [location] on [date]. I make this statement to the best of my recollection.

Witnesses to the event is/are ____________________ of [location]. Contact is/are _______________.

On the evening of __________________ I proceeded to _______________ for the purposes of socializing with the witness. The bar is located at ______________________ .

At _________ I was approached by [name]. As my coach of three months, we were previously acquainted. While he appeared to not be consuming alcohol it should be noted I myself had consumed three. This by no means was over an acceptable limit. We exchanged small talk. He seemed to be strongly encouraging me to continue to consume additional alcohol of which I was concerned about.

At this time I became both uncomfortable and alarmed; and as such, commenced contacting my friend, [full name and contact]. The direction [name] was taking the conversation was outside my comfort zone. The subject of the text conversation was a plea for help. It was hoped that she could provide a distraction. She was unable to do so.

The context of the situation deteriorated to that which was more than merely uncomfortable. At this point he began to make unsolicited contact and got well inside my comfort zone. On no less than FIVE occasions I asked him to stop. There was no question about my intent. The physicalilty of the situation extended to attempts to kiss me. This constitutes a sexual assault.

When my attempts to rebuff his advances failed, I had no choice but to draw upon my martial arts skills to prevent further assault.

It was at this point that others in the establishment took notice.

From this point the evening progressed as........
===========================================
Sign and date this

In addition put into writing the action you wish to be taken. I hope this is of some help for you. I am quite upset that this happened to you. It is shocking. I am glad you were able to ultimately protect yourself.

[PreciousQueen]

Originally Posted by justafriend306

Okay, so I hope you are not offended but I took the time to draft up a template that might work. If it is of no use to you that is all right. Perhaps others might have their own ideas on how to tweek your statement.

==================================
Attention: XXXXXXXXXXXXX
Re: THE MATTER OF XXXXXXXXXXX
Reference(s):[list here any coversations you had regarding the event]

Please accept this correspondence as testimony regarding the subject matter having occured on or about [time] at [location] on [date]. I make this statement to the best of my recollection.

Witnesses to the event is/are ____________________ of [location]. Contact is/are _______________.

On the evening of __________________ I proceeded to _______________ for the purposes of socializing with the witness. The bar is located at ______________________ .

At _________ I was approached by [name]. As my coach of three months, we were previously acquainted. While he appeared to not be consuming alcohol it should be noted I myself had consumed three. This by no means was over an acceptable limit. We exchanged small talk. He seemed to be strongly encouraging me to continue to consume additional alcohol of which I was concerned about.

At this time I became both uncomfortable and alarmed; and as such, commenced contacting my friend, [full name and contact]. The direction [name] was taking the conversation was outside my comfort zone. The subject of the text conversation was a plea for help. It was hoped that she could provide a distraction. She was unable to do so.

The context of the situation deteriorated to that which was more than merely uncomfortable. At this point he began to make unsolicited contact and got well inside my comfort zone. On no less than FIVE occasions I asked him to stop. There was no question about my intent. The physicalilty of the situation extended to attempts to kiss me. This constitutes a sexual assault.

When my attempts to rebuff his advances failed, I had no choice but to draw upon my martial arts skills to prevent further assault.

It was at this point that others in the establishment took notice.

From this point the evening progressed as........
===========================================
Sign and date this

In addition put into writing the action you wish to be taken. I hope this is of some help for you. I am quite upset that this happened to you. It is shocking. I am glad you were able to ultimately protect yourself.

I am not offended. This can help me a lot. The only problem with this is that it's going to be a video, so I'll have to adjust it so I won't sound too robotic. I also can't give names, location ,etc for security reasons. If this video is shared a lot, I don't want people to know where I drink. I love that bar and will be going back, just not alone after work after this incident. 😬😬

Great and thank you. I have a little experience with this. My encouragement is sent your way.

As for the video itself, note that legally it cannot be shared beyond those persons you have originally been advised about. If you haven't already, start to document everything; not just the even, but all persons involved and including any conversations.

Now if I understood this correctly, what happened is considered a sexual assault. I encourage you to approach the police on this matter and provide them with the same statement. If you feel uncomfortable with this, there are ways to find an advocate to assist you. Contact the EAP of your employer if one is in place. Contact your mental health association. Contact your local chapter/support group for survivors of assault. Contact information for all of these should be available through your local health region/hospitals.

I want to tell you too that you in no way brought this on upon yourself. No one deserves this kind of attention. It is never acceptable. It is illegal.

Take care.

[childofchaos831]

Originally Posted by justafriend306

Great and thank you. I have a little experience with this. My encouragement is sent your way.

As for the video itself, note that legally it cannot be shared beyond those persons you have originally been advised about. If you haven't already, start to document everything; not just the even, but all persons involved and including any conversations.

Now if I understood this correctly, what happened is considered a sexual assault. I encourage you to approach the police on this matter and provide them with the same statement. If you feel uncomfortable with this, there are ways to find an advocate to assist you. Contact the EAP of your employer if one is in place. Contact your mental health association. Contact your local chapter/support group for survivors of assault. Contact information for all of these should be available through your local health region/hospitals.

I want to tell you too that you in no way brought this on upon yourself. No one deserves this kind of attention. It is never acceptable. It is illegal.

Take care.

My understanding is that this is a promotion video/advertisement for the gym where OP learned the defense she used, not a legal thing.

oh, I completely got this wrong. Gosh I feel like a ditz. sorry. I'm gone.

[PreciousQueen]

The

Originally Posted by justafriend306

oh, I completely got this wrong. Gosh I feel like a ditz. sorry. I'm gone.

It's okay. It's helping me organize it a little more and piece it together so I'm not just babbling👍🏽

[childofchaos831]

Originally Posted by justafriend306

oh, I completely got this wrong. Gosh I feel like a ditz. sorry. I'm gone.

It's ok. A lot of what you said still applies. OP getting the details down will help with telling the story in an organized way, which is always good.