I don't know much about Autism. I imagine it is not easy to raise a child.

I really felt for a woman at the store today. Her son was being more than difficult. Other customers were muttering under their breath about how horrible the child was or for the mother to do something about it. It really was extreme. But I felt for this woman who was clearly exhausted. Some light went on that made me stop from silently admonishing the mother and child. Then another customer in the aisle commented on what a terrible mother she must be and I found myself defending her. It occurred to me this child could have had a deeper problem that went beyond just having a tantrum. My heart went out to both her and child. I wanted to reach out to her and acknowledge I understood the rough time she was having. Would that have been too much? I need not have vocalized my suspicions.

People are jerks! I have 4 kids. My oldest was a real handful. He would have screaming, kicking, biting, throw down fits in stores. I would sit on the floor and bear hug him until he calmed down. Keeping in mind that my kids were born close together. 4 in 4 years. I am pretty outspoken so I had no problem calling people out for staring or being rude. As if it isn't hard enough to be handling 4 kids, 1 of which is having a meltdown without people criticizing your for it.

My oldest is now 11 and neurotypical. He's a great kid. Unless a parent is being abusive, I will get vocal and defend them. Kids push boundaries and you have no idea what is going on and thus no right to judge.

And yes, kind comments as a mom do help. I got those too. It's nice to have someone in your corner.

[divine1966]

People have no idea yet are quick to judge. Especially the ones who don’t even have kids and aren’t familiar with what might be going on.

[healingme4me]

Kids have minds and personalities of their own.
This actually reminded me of a spar of words my mom had with a woman at the grocery store(hello huge triggering place for kids-adults too sometimes). My mom wasn't defending me nor my kids but a stranger whose child had a meltdown and this other woman made a snide comment. It was rather heated actually. My mom was in tears that this woman had zero compassion and was curt with all she said.
Ironically, this curt woman just so happened to be a coworker of mine at my last place of employment. :\

I hate judgement full stop

that could be people judging me, or people judging others.

until you've actually witnessed the situation and been their yourself, you have no right to judge

[YoucancallmeFlower]

Plus, you never know who you are messing with. The day after my
beloved cat died I was in the grocery store. Went to get in line and there was a cart just packed but no one was there. I had three or four things in my hand so I went around the cart and as the shopper returned, she
made a smart as comment.
Wrong move.
My alters were still out and the scary one went off on her. All conversation stopped. The manager came over but shut up when
that laser anger focused on him. That alter could have easily killed
that woman. Thank God I didn't have a weapon that day.
So you just never know.
Someone can be in full melt down mode, ready to explode with grief
and rage. You misread the signals, make a comment about something
and end up getting your as kicked.