[KathyM]

Some people have asked to be my friend on this site. Others have said I am welcome here. Some are frightened of me and want me destroyed.

Why?

[nowheretorun]

im unable to speak for others ((KM)))) i would like to call you friend for many reasons.. one is because of your effort towards bringing confusion into the light where we can examine it, find our misunderstandings and look at healthier ways of being in these confused times... you have an ability to bring the controversial forward, controversy doesnt frighten me, it challenges me, challenges give me an opportunity to find deeper meaning and understanding and to broaden my healing abilities..

you have an ability to remain human during the excruciating self examination process and to make me feel accepted even tho i might not be viewing some matter in the most open light i might be able to and in that way you guide me and lead me towards healthier friendships here, and in my daily life at home and in my own community...

you offer cheer and a smile when i need it.. i know i can count on you for unsweetened truth and a kind hand to help me deal with that truth..

i call you friend because we work and share together here and you play some great music and accept me as i am, even when i have a hard time accepting myself..

people who harbor ill feelings towards others might appear to want to have you destroyed because fragile egos feel threatened... it is the strong ego that can bear truth..

fragile egos cannot admit unhealthy behavior and therefore are reluctant to grow within themself and so do not want others to grow, maybe because they are afraid of being left behind... if only they knew that you are giving them opportunity..

it saddens me when someone with broad understanding is met with unhealthy resistance... the whole community suffers..

it is sad that unhealthy individuals cannot rise above thier own selfish misunderstandings for the good of the whole

its more sad when the resistance to health succeeds

its even sadder still when the community finally realizes the truth and decides to grow, but only long after those with vision have lived a life of pain and misunderstanding delivered by those that you attempted to help

sending you my cares always sweet, strong, kind, person...

none among us is perfect, but what i like about you is your patient compassion (and i do understand the impatience you might be feeling at times)

just dont give up, k? you have me as a friend for certain... (hope thats a good thing )

Dearest (kathyM) ))))))))))) I will and do always consider you a friend.
We met here at pc.

To be frightened of you is a sad thing. You are be no means a scarey person. At all.
You are a Mom, a person. a person who cares very deeply.
You are the kind of person who speaks thier truth. For that I think you are a good person.
I have no problem calling you a friend. We have shared storys on our sons, what we believe in. Many different topics.
We have shared saddness, happiness of your son coming home
You are always welcome here, always ((((you will always matter here)))))))))))))))
You are a good and kind person. Know within your heart I care.

[nowheretorun]

((KM))) ((muffy))))) sometimes it is best just to know when it is time for a breather

[gimmeice]

((((((((((((( KathyM ))))))))))))
I am sending you some hugs

[nowheretorun]

((KM))) i have been giving this more thought... sometimes i have allowed what others think of me as a person, to get in the way of things bigger than myself that really matter....

always be kind to you caring one

[free2beme]

((((((((((((( KathyM ))))))))))))

Why are we friends?

.....by chance we met . . .
By choice we became friends.

[KathyM]

Maybe I didn't clarify myself here. I'm not looking for friends - old or new. I'm just wondering why "strangers" want to be my friend. Some look familiar, but I'm not sure where we met, why and under what circumstances. In many ways I have been connected to this site for a very long time.

If we're "long-time" friends, please be specific on where we met, when, and by what name(s) you've given yourself in the past - on the internet and in the real world. If we've met in person and you've been inside my home, please let me know. Also, who are our mutual friends? Do we know each other on other forums - which ones? We met "here" isn't really an answer - anyone can look around a room and say "I am here."

If we haven't met before I understand the sentiment, but if you don't know me - why would you want to attach yourself to me? I'm not a "counselor" or "professional."

I'm not angry - just a little confused and would appreciate some clarification.

Kathy,

I just wanted to say I consider you a friend

[inkblot]

Why NOT?! We all have a few common denominators encircling the mental health/illness issues. Such as...the MI itself, our love for DocJohn, the sibling rivalry we share from time to time, the want and willingness to help and show support for each other... The list goes on and on and on and...! What's not to like, Friend?

[KathyM]

Originally Posted by inkblot

Why NOT?! We all have a few common denominators encircling the mental health/illness issues. Such as...the MI itself, our love for DocJohn, the sibling rivalry we share from time to time, the want and willingness to help and show support for each other... The list goes on and on and on and...! What's not to like, Friend?

I see your point inkblot - but I didn't originally come here for MI issues. I've never met DocJohn. I love my husband, and he loves me. DocJohn has never professed any "love" for me. I don't have any real siblings here, let alone rivalry. I only have a handful of friends, and they know better than to play tricks on me.

Wouldn't YOU feel strange if you were out there on the street and a bunch of people surrounded you asked to be your friend, taste their fruit, and said "What's not to like Friend?'"

If we haven't met or know each other personally, please don't respond to this post. It's not a philosophical question.

Kathy,

I guess I'm not entirely clear on what you mean. Maybe you can help me to understand.

Is it that you are getting friend requests from people you do not know very well on the forums? Is it that you find this unnerving, and wonder why those people want to be your friend when they don't seem to know you very well yet?

I find that often people will send out a friend request if they read a few posts from a person and tend to agree with them or want to get to know them better than they do. You have the ability though, to refuse those friend requests, and thats well within your right to do so. You also have the ability to PM that person, and ask them "hey - how do we know each other" or say "sorry I only accept friend requests from those I know well". You should not feel badly for doing either of those. You do what you need to to feel safe.

I have to admit I am a little concerned about this thread potentially making people feel that it might be about them. I know that you are generalizing, but I also worry that someone who is sensitive may take to thinking that the thread is about them, when in fact its not. For this reason, it might be a better way to go about finding out if you PM the person, or if you contact admin in the case of someone harassing you or refusing to stop sending requests or whatnot.

I can see why you might feel a little strange getting those friend requests. I think in general they are just a way for people to reach out to each other and connect. You always have the right of refusal however.