[Beholden]

Hi, I posted this in a social group I started several weeks ago, but thought I'd repost it here. I'd just love to hear some feed back on anyone with an adoption story and how things are going today or how it has touched your life. Here is my older post:

Today I have some especially terrific news. I've known for about 2 weeks now, I'm a Grandma again. Yeah, I know it happens. But this is different. Twenty-one years ago, our son and his then girlfriend had a baby and gave him up for adoption. That baby was so beautiful. We were at the hospital for the birth. We all held him, loved him, said good-bye to him and I prayed a silent prayer that one day we would be reunited with him.

He contacted our son and asked to start a relationship with him. You have no idea how that felt to me when my son told me. He e-mailed a photo of my grandson. OMG as the kids all say today. When the photo opened in the e-mail, it showed just the top of his head, his eyebrows and eyes. He has my son's eyes; I was shocked!

After the inital shock of seeing this flesh and blood being (well, sort of, in pixalated form anyway) I scrolled down to reveal the rest of his face. He has his mother's nose and mouth. He has maybe my family nose though at second thought. He is handsome. Built like his father. Tall, slim, and a nice dresser----well the photo was taken at a wedding so what do I know (yet).

Our son is taking it slow for now...just answering his son's questions and giving out little bits of information to L's curiosity. What is really neat about it, my son's wife is adopted, and she is so happy for him to finally know he has a son he can now share a life with. He loves kids. He never talked about his child after he signed off his parental rights. It was the best choice at the time.

So, as you see, I'm a happy little girl with my hair flowing behind me, just trying to catch up on an old part of me that is new again. Wish our family well and please say some prayers that the reunion will continue to grow and that we will met some day.

I think maybe God really did hear me all those years ago when I kissed that beautiful little gift on the cheek. It was such heartache back then. "I think"...my faith is being renewed. "I hope" is beginning to return to my vocabulary. It's been easier - more satisfing to pray for something besides some of the oh poor me, help me when I get into the stuck in dark moods. So I'll stay with happy thoughts today thinking that I can share L with you all here at PC.

Thanks

[lenjan]

I've written about my experiences as a birthmom all over the place, including here http://psychcentral.com/lib/2006/a-birthmoms-pain/ . I don't want to hijack your thread, so I'll just say that I've had email contact with my son for almost 6 years now and it has done me a world of good. That doesn't mean that the psychological scars that came from the first 15 years are gone -- they won't ever be gone, no matter how much therapy, etc I have. Closed adoption did more to permanently destroy my mental health than an entire childhood of multiple forms of abuse. But at least now that I know how and where he is and we have built something of a relationship, things have eased for me.

Best wishes and blessings to you -- and share about L anytime -- I, for one, love to hear happy stories.

Candy

[Beholden]

Oh, Candy thank you so much for your offer to share L. And please don't think you will be hijacking my thread. I'd love to keep hearing from you right here about anything you may have going that worked or didn't work out so good.

At this point in time I have no control with the issue. It is right now just my son and his newly indroducted birth son. My son D has a wife, P and she is thrilled about the entire thing. He is taking is slow as L. want to go.

Really do enjoy finding out all of the stuff beople do when adoptions happen.

I haven't writting,e-mailed or spoked to L yet and am waiting unti lmy son says okay, he is ready to meat you and day

man my typin gis getting very difficult, I took 5 more mg of Ambien and Now I'm reallly getting "buzzed" or whatever it does, my fingers and brain anr no longer working together inthe right way. I"d best gte to my bed nd sleep now.

Love,

Vicki