The effects of these meds are worse than the trauma that got me here in the 1st place

Life is hard, I’ve endured much in my lifetime as have we all. I have never been on meds or been diagnosed with anything other than PTSD due to abuse throughout my childhood. I’ve accomplished much, the most significant of which is that I had overcome my childhood, I was a victorious survivor. Fast forward 30 years. In May of this year, I was once again a victim of sexual assault, though not outright rape so there was no recourse for the assailant. For me, on the other hand, it opened up a Pandora’s box. It was a traumatic event and I think it is understandable that I went a little crazy. Maybe a lot crazy. Still, understandable I think. I was immediately placed under TDO and taken to a psych ward. This is immediately after the assault. I was given no therapy except for the five minutes allotted to me by the psychiatrist at the ward who insisted I was major depressive and prescribed me anti-psychotics and anti-depressants. I wasn’t depressed before the incident. Blindly I thought he knew best. I was on seroquel, Klonopin and Lexapro. I weaned myself off the seroquel within a month because I didn’t believe I needed to take anti psychotics if I wasn’t psychotic in the first place. Next, I exchanged my Lexapro for Zoloft, my outpatient psychiatrist said it had less side efffects. 3 weeks ago, I took my last zoloft. The withdrawals were terrible but I made it through. Now all I have left is the Klonopin. I was prescribed 1 mg a day and at one point was told 1.5 mg a day might make me feel better. I may have taken 1 or 1.5 a couple random days in these last 5 months, but mostly I only ever took .5 mg before bed. I am trying to reduce my dose, but every reduction throws my mind and body into an upheaval and I end up going back to the .5. I cannot get off this Klonopin.

There is no question attached to this post. I think what I needed most was to unload this story off my chest. Thank you for having this community so that I can at least feel like my story is being heard by others who are going through the same thing.