[Lotis19]

On December 29th, it will be the 11 year anniversary of one of my good friend's passing away. He committed suicide, we were only 13 years old, and it hit me hard, and that's when I first really felt depression. It still hits me hard and on the 29th, I usually can not function properly and all I want to do is cry. Does it every get any better? Is there anything that I can do to try and make it better? I know that my friend wouldn't want me to be so sad, especially after all these years.

[bebop]

that is a long time to suffer on that day every year. I did that for a few years with lost loved ones. even a granddaughter. I would suggest on that day to find something to keep yourself busy. You are right though...your friend would not want you to continue to be sad on that day. why not celebrate his life instead on that day? turn it into something positive. good luck hon.

[Perna]

Therapy helped me with my feelings of loss at certain dates/times of year. I would do as bebop says and try to keep myself engaged that day and/or think of some good memory and think of a way to "honor" your friend that day, make a ritual of remembering and doing something good that day.

[KathyM]

((Lotis))

Your friend lost his chance at living a long and full life - you didn't. In a way, the baton of life has been passed to you. You can honor your friend by remaining strong and trying your best to live a good, clean life - the one he didn't get to live.

When the anniversary comes around, remember some good times with him that will bring a smile to your face. Remember the obstacles you faced and conquered together. Be thankful you had such a good friend in your life, even if it wasn't long enough. Then shake it off and get back to living the life he didn't get to live. I suspect he'd feel horrible if he knew his death caused you not to live yours - even for just one day.