[Lexicon78]

I found out yesterday that I'm gonna be an aunt...that was the trigger for all of this. I started thinking about how happy my mom would've been to see another grandchild on the way.

Sure I feel like less of a woman because I'm the only one in the family to be without children, but that's not what this is about...all triggers to thinking about my mom.

I miss her so badly...I just want to give up sometimes to be with her. But I have a bf to tend to, my father would be crushed, so would the rest of the family. I can't stand it sometimes that I'm without my mother. When I imagine her face I start to cry. Last night all I could do was see her happy in my mind.

I hope I am not one big disappointment to her, where ever she is. I feel like I may be because I have no children yet. This is a big issue because I really want children but I may end up being without child...

[dottie]

Hi Lex. Maybe I can help you. Have you tried writing down all reasons you want to become a mother? Then list all your qualifications. If you are satisfied with what you have written down. Just relax and let nature take its course, Whatever will be, will be.

Good luck! Hope this will help you sort things out!!

~Dottie

[Lexicon78]

I thought today would be a good day not to think of my mom...so I didn't take my Lexapro which makes me worse...maybe today will continue to be a good day!