Hello there.
I've experienced so much loss in my lifetime. Growing up, my dad was never home because he worked long hours. And whenever he was home, he had quite a drinking problem. So i avoided him.
I never really had much of a father, I guess.

And now he moved to another state because his job moved, and I feel utterly abandoned.

Not to mention all the death Ive experienced. Im gonna estimate that I've been to at least 30 funerals in the last 10 years alone, and I;ve only just turned 18. A lot of them being immediate family.
I lost my uncle and my grandma in a month time period.
And a few years before that, I lost my great uncle and my great aunt in the same year, and I was very close to them.
And last year one of the kids in my class, a close friend of one of my oldest friends, died tragically. And theres a ton more.

It just seems like everytime I turn around someone is leaving me. And I'm so scared that I'm going to be alone for the rest of my life.

How do I cope with this? This loss and this grief?

[sundog]

I am so very sorry for all the many losses you have suffered (((((((((((MelMel)))))))))))) That is incredibly rough. I would think the best way to work through this would be with a grief counselor. Can you look into something like that? This is too much to have to handle all on your own. But a trained professional could help.

Wishing you peace ((((((((((MelMel)))))))))))

[notablackbarbie]

oh my goodness! (((MelMel15)))
I am so sorry you have gone through so much! Each of us has our own struggles which can be overwhelming at times. Yet i cannot imagine all that you have gone through already at 18. Is it possible to still keep in touch with the ones alive who may have been close to the ones that passed? Share memories with friends and celebrate the happy times...Listen to stories from family members about something especially unique about your great aunt & uncle...Enjoy and appreciate those caring/quiet/fun moments... The feelings you have are hard, but i think also necessary in processing grief. I do not think you will FOREVER be alone and drowning in pain. You could try talking to a counsellor or therapist IRL to get additional support and perspective. Going to T may also just be an opportunity to have a safe space to just "get everything out" - concerns, fears, questions etc; as well as possibly start looking ahead with additional care by your side. Again my condolences go out to you and yours... such losses must be so heartbreaking and frustrating (at the very least). You dont have to be alone ok? *and offers shoulder to lean on & an open ear to listen...*