[CaptainKirk]

I thought I was fine, but my recent nightmares have proven otherwise. So here goes...

A few months ago I had two totally amazing friends, girls ages eleven and thirteen. Unfortunately, I wasn't enough to keep them around... They were both getting really severely bullied at their respective schools, and it really tore me to pieces when my eleven year old friend started cutting and wouldn't stop. Around the same time, they both killed themselves. The only other friend I had at the time was hit by a car at fourteen and didn't make it to the hospital. Shortly after that, a friend of hers latched on to me and I let us get pretty close, but she killed herself too...

Their ages bother me more than anything else, and what totally amazing people they were. Now I've got my first male friend, and it's pretty clear that he has some problems too. I don't know what I'm going to do if I lose him, but after I stopped talking to people most of those who used to enjoy my company decided that I'm a jerk and just completely ignore me now, which means that he's all I have. I don't know how to handle this anymore, and I'm not sure if I want to...

[NWgirl2013]

I hope you have access to some sort of counseling. Grief counseling would be ideal.
The trauma of losing one friend is immense. The trauma & pain you must feel at losing several, at any age, must feel unbearable.

I am so sorry for you loss. It is not your fault.

Yours is a strong heart. You have managed to seek help in this very sad time. It is a good sign that you are willing to step back and assess what has happened.

Strong prayers for healing are coming your way...

[CaptainKirk]

Originally Posted by NWgirl2013

I hope you have access to some sort of counseling. Grief counseling would be ideal.
The trauma of losing one friend is immense. The trauma & pain you must feel at losing several, at any age, must feel unbearable.

I am so sorry for you loss. It is not your fault.

Yours is a strong heart. You have managed to seek help in this very sad time. It is a good sign that you are willing to step back and assess what has happened.

Strong prayers for healing are coming your way...

I really can't get counseling right now. But thank you for your support.

[_Theodora]

wow. (((((((((hugs)))))))))) help at all? they are yours.

So is cyberspace. This site is filled with wonderful members who can and will be your "friend"...course, it isn't RL; but, till you can handle your losses, maybe this is a good place to hang out?

There are all sorts of forums, so many threads to read...so many stories here of loss and of overcoming grief and loss. Many here will help. Some fabulous people here! Helped me a great deal through some intensely bad times in my life, when I had no one IRL.

~~~~~~~~~I wish you all that is kind and gentle on your journey?~~~theo

[CaptainKirk]

Originally Posted by _Theodora

wow. (((((((((hugs)))))))))) help at all? they are yours.

So is cyberspace. This site is filled with wonderful members who can and will be your "friend"...course, it isn't RL; but, till you can handle your losses, maybe this is a good place to hang out?

There are all sorts of forums, so many threads to read...so many stories here of loss and of overcoming grief and loss. Many here will help. Some fabulous people here! Helped me a great deal through some intensely bad times in my life, when I had no one IRL.

~~~~~~~~~I wish you all that is kind and gentle on your journey?~~~theo

Thank you, I really appreciate your support.