[kitty2004]

My husband has been living with the fear of his father dying all his life, his father has had kidney failure when he was two and has had a successful transplant, but now his kidneys are beginning to fail again and my husband is coping well.

He is feeling angry and sad, he says he feels guilty because he has given up hope that his father will pull through. He is rather irritable with the people around him, and his outbursts of verbal anger are just adding to his guilt. When he speaks about how he is feeling to me, I try my best to listen but he then brings up old issues and unresolved conflicts he has with my brothers and starts an argument.

He says his work life, family life and our relationship (cause the unresolved issue he has with my brothers which I feel has nothing to do with our relationship) is all falling apart and he can't take it anymore. I don't know what to do to help him anymore, he says I don't understand and because he is over sensitive, he miss interprets a lot of what I say to try and help.

Someone please help me, I need some advise and pointers on how to help him deal with whats happening

[CANDC]

Kitty, sounds like your efforts to help are meeting resistance. A trained counselor is a possible help to resolve things. You can only help yourself and be as compassionate and non imflammatory as possible.
Some of the other forums could be of interest.

These articles could be a help.
Psych Central - Search results for Helping a grieving partner