so this is pretty devistating.

recently i found out that my family had planned my nan's funeral- the songs, the bible readings, what everyone was going to say, where it was going to be held, etc etc.

she's not dead yet, but this is horrible.

i have also been informed by them that i can't write any words to be read at the funeral, i can't attend, i can't say my final goodbyes, i can't go near her... apparently, i'm not "family enough". (family enough, is that a word?). anyway, it is now.

i feel like i'm grieving her all ready- she's 93 years old with dimentia, and i'm not even allowed to phone and see how she's doing in what could be her last few months, and not allowed to attend the funeral?

feel really upset about this- even more so that i didn't get any say in any of the planning

[nicoleflynn]

My mom just died at 93 1/2,

Why aren't you allowed to phone or see her or attend the funeral? How can anyone stop you from doing those things? Don't allow anyone to stop you from doing what you want to; how cruel! Go and see her. Write what you want to say.

Originally Posted by nicoleflynn

My mom just died at 93 1/2,

Why aren't you allowed to phone or see her or attend the funeral? How can anyone stop you from doing those things? Don't allow anyone to stop you from doing what you want to; how cruel! Go and see her. Write what you want to say.

thanks for that encouraging post.

and i'm sorry to hear about your mom... so sad.

[jaynedough]

I'm so sorry that you're facing the loss of your Nan.

I'm also sorry your family is being this way. If, for some reason, they really do bar you from the funeral, is there another way you could honor your Nan?

[May.1442]

They can't keep you from calling her, she's your nan after all, she's direct family. Please don't let them hold you back, just call her. Kind wishes x

[Sabrina]

This would break my heart too. I'm so sorry.