[Jenny4645]

Just yesterday night my 23 year old daughter called me to say her boyfriend died. I cannot get her voice saying these words out of my head. I went cold and my heart started pounding. I went to see her and she screamed and cried and hit things and kept saying this can't be real.
I have never met him since he lives quite far and they dated for 8 months. I have texted him and heard all about him. I am grieving as if I knew him. Is that normal?? I have anxiety, I can't eat, I cry...mostly I want to know what is the best thing I can do right now for my daughter. I feel so horrible for her. I am going to schedule counseling for her as well.

[Skeezyks]

Hello Jenny: My condolences on your daughter's loss. In answer to your question, at least from my perspective, yes... how you're feeling is pretty normal. There have been a couple of people I've known over the internet who have died. I never met them & really didn't even know that much about them. But I still felt badly leaning they had passed.

In your case, you had come to know your daughter's bf even though the two of you had not met. And, in addition, I'm quite certain you have great concern for your daughter's welfare. As you wrote, you feel horrible for her. Some counseling for your daughter will probably be most helpful for her. It may also help you just to know she is being cared for. However, if you find that your own grief & anxiety is not subsiding, you may want to consider seeking some counseling or therapy for yourself if you are not presently receiving these services. Continuing to post here on PC may be helpful as well. My best wishes to you both...