[upintheair]

My sister is very ill. Nobody knew what was going on in our family. We are not a very "tight" family by any means but we still care. I have concerns for her and I fear that she will not recover. We have never been close so I do not know how to help her. She is young and yet so ill. I do not know how to reach out to her, she has so much hate inside. I can not blame her, our family has done much harm but I do not want to leave her on her own. She pushes us away. What do we do?

Stephanie.

[wisewoman]

Hey up, just send her love and encouraging brief words on cards and if she's close enough bring her little goodies like magazines that she might enjoy. Keep the words minimum and just send your caring. If she can she will take it in and if she can't you have given love freely in hopes of easing her pain and healing your relationship.

You may start small....just work on the one relationship between you and your sister, rather than your sister and the entire family. That may be too must all at once. If there were bad words, or deeds, apologize, and try to make amends. Offer support by your actions too, not just words. Send helpful items, offer to drive to doctor appointments etc. Perhaps if you can heal this one bond, then you can work together on the larger ones? Small steps first.

Emmy

[ktp]

I understand and totally empathize with your situation. I would suggest you just let her know you're there if she needs anything. Send her your phone number, cell number. Express that ANYTHING means anything. You can open the door that way. There are times when my siblings and I have gone through months without speaking, but when something happens, we all can depend on one another. The only way to fix the situation is to take the initiative, if only for your own peace of mind. You can only do what you can do and what others allow you to. I wish you much luck.

(((Hugs))) <-- if you want them.

Take care.
(btw: Stephanie is my only sister's name)