[mommytojack]

any mothers or fathers out there having trouble getting their babies to sleep in their crib? I am!!! It takes me almost an hour to make my son fall asleep in his crib and he wakes up within an hour and wants me. I don't know what to do anymore, it's getting worse. Any suggestions?

How old is he?

Im probably not much help to you because I am an advocate of cosleeping However I too am a young mom, 25 and just had my boy three weeks ago

Welcome

[MyBestKids2]

Hi mommytojack

I did keep my children in my bed for their first month. After that, they went to the crib, then youth bed, etc. My pediatrician always reminded me children need to learn to self-soothe at a young age so they can grow with the habit and routine. As hard as it was, I did "ignore" the cry (standing outside the room quiet as a mouse). It can be difficult to do all at once, so perhaps not going in as soon each night. First night, wait 10 minutes, 2nd night 20 minutes...

Only one gals' opinion!

Good luck,
Dee

[Peanuts]

My youngest is 10 already but we did struggle with getting the kids on a solid night time routine. I recommend a book by Richard Ferber, "Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems". It helped us a great deal.

take care,

copy & paste frm Barnesandnoble.com:
Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems
by Richard Ferber
Paperback - New, Revised, and Expanded Edition
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ISBN-13: 9780743201636Sales Rank: 4,064Pub. Date: May 2006Dr. Ferber provides safe, sound ideas for helping your child fall and stay asleep. He is the director of the Sleep Laboratory and Center for Pediatric Sleep Disorders at ... More
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[coldwinter]

If you find yourself getting irritable and not getting enough sleep due to this then I recommend cosleeping. It is easier to pat their legs or massage them when the baby is near while at the same time you are comfortably lying beside him.

Slowly ween him to sleep in his crib during daytime when you are well rested and you have more energy. There are babies that are too clingy and my first born is like that. I think he likes to hear the sound of my heartbeat because he gets irritated when I put him to bed. His preferred mode of sleeping is with me carrying him. I could still recall those exhausting moments. It will pass.

let them go to bed with an item of your clothing they can smell you ! Also a ticking clock at the bottem of the cot helps it really does.

Tape record the hoover and play that or some gentle music too, but dont pick them up to hold them just to replace the covers and without talking to them.

Try to sit in another room only go check on them every ten mins or so he/she will get used to it but it may take a few days of consistancy.

How are you going about getting him to sleep to begin with. rocking, screaming it out, ect... ? My daughter went through this. We finally let her scream it out. I checked on her every five and then ten minuets. How old is your child? He may be at the stage that he is learning about object pertenence. (Can't spell sorry) This means that if they can't see you or anything that it is gone forever. You leave the room you are gone forever. Thats why if you do the screaming out method you let them know you are still there every five and then ten minuets. You have to build up to the ten. And it may take a few nights. Don't pick them up just rub on the back and say mommy is here its ok.

A good way to practice this during the day is playing hide and seek with toys. Or go out of site for a short period but keep talking and then reappear.

[youOme]

It's a very very very hard thing to do....but LET him cry.

Encourage him before bed...say "It's time to sleep like a big boy, all by yourself". Prepare him an hour before bed, say it over and over. Let him know it's time. He might be young, but I'm sure he understands night night time or crib.

It's okay to let him cry, it's not as though he needs anything or is hurt. It just seems that way.

My son started doing that "Can't sleep unless Mom's laying next to me" stuff, I had to nip that in the rear though because I do my homework after they go to bed. Basically I warned him, made my tuck ins shorter and shorter, then let him cry. Eventually his crying went from forever, to shorter, to no more.

Good luck, hope everything works out.

[wisewoman]

I am so not an advocate of crying it out. I believe that when you leave a child to cry it out the child learns that you will not respond to his needs and gives up. I think that letting the child fall asleep with gentle hugs, rocking, and yes sleeping with you is probably best. Remember that many countries don't have separate beds or separate rooms for sleeping.

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wisewoman said:
I am so not an advocate of crying it out. I believe that when you leave a child to cry it out the child learns that you will not respond to his needs and gives up. I think that letting the child fall asleep with gentle hugs, rocking, and yes sleeping with you is probably best. Remember that many countries don't have separate beds or separate rooms for sleeping.

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I completely agree.

When a child is left to cry it out, as wisewoman says, the child learns that he cannot depend on or trust his providers to care for him when he needs it.

And, I would wager that much of the time the baby falls asleep from exhaustion from crying anyways.

Can you imagine if that was your only way to communicate when you were in need of food or comfort and no one responded, how would that make you feel? Do you think you would feel confident or secure and happy? To me it makes a little bit more sense that if parents do respond to baby, baby learns that the method of communication is effective and that the parents will be there to meet their needs and to comfort them or tell them that everything will be ok if that’s what they need. I think that will develop a more secure and confident happy baby.

again, I say cosleep if it will work for you. The main thing is that the baby is sleeping. There will be lots of time later in his life for learning to sleep alone when he can better communicate through things like words or coming to get you when he is in a bed and able to walk.

Im wondering, is there a reason you feel so strongly about him being in the crib alone? Is it that you have other things to do, need some time alone, ect...

Are you nursing? Or Formula feeding?

If you are nursing its not that uncommon for babies to wake often at night and need to nurse, because breastmilk is processed faster than formula. Because they digest it so quickly often they get hungry again quite quickly.

Also, how long has this been happening? It could be that your baby is going through a growth spurt. Has your baby learned any new skills lately? Often times when a baby learns a new skill their sleep will be patchy for a while.

How often does your baby sleep during the day? What times on average does baby sleep during the day? When does he eat during the day?

All of these could potentially have an impact on your babys sleep.

What time do you put him to bed at night? Are you putting him to bed on your schedule or when he gets sleepy? At 8 months he may not be on much of a schedule yet and if you try to get him down too early he may just continuously wake up.

[wisewoman]

Rainbowz you say it for me so well. Good luck Mommytojack!

[AAAAA]

I too had my children sleep with me. We all slept better. If you don't want him in bed with you, try a pallet on the floor.

[Razzleberry]

Try getting into a set routine every night. Whether it's reading a story, bath, brushing teeth...just do the SAME things EVERY night and in the same order. That helps the baby get into the habit that okay, i read a story, then I go to bed.

How old is he/she? I might have missed that.

You can also try white noise - like a fan, or humidifier...that constant humming sound can help some kids.

Other than that, you already got some good suggestions above. Good luck.

[trixielou]

ive been blessed in this area. although my baby did sleep in her basinette until she was 6 months old. we lived in an apartment that was dark & dingy. we moved over the summer & she took right to her bed. up until about now after bathtime about 8 i would lay her down & give her her bottle (thats the only way she likes it is laying down) shes never been a rock baby to sleep cuddle give her a bottle type baby. anyways she would turn over & go right to sleep. shes in her 11th month & going thru a stage where she constantly stands up & falls down in her bed til shes exhausted & goes to sleep. also with the crying added in. ive always layed in my bed watching tv & ignore her & she goes to sleep within a half hour. she wakes up at night here & there & i give her the pacifier. when that doesnt work i know shes wanting a bottle. every now & then on mornings when i just want more sleep i ignore her & let her play in her crib. again this is just once in awhile i dont want to sound neglectful. i think its good to teach them early sometimes mommy needs extra rest & to entertain themselves.