I am considering filing for SSD.

Sadly, my mental and emotional state continues to get worse. Yesterday, I met with someone in a clinic to evaluate if I should file for SSD.

Living on SSD benefits is not an easy life. I will be poor. But, I do not foresee anyone hiring me. I have had panic attacks / emotional outbursts at my last two jobs. Granted, there were circumstances. I was working for psychopaths who wanted me to quit; who purposely made the jobs impossible. But, I could not handle the harrassment. And, it not only led to my firings but also to PTSD, anxiety and depression issues. The harrassment also made it difficult to look for another job as it made me feel desperate and of low value. I worked harder and harder to hang on. Now, I do not know if anyone with hire me. So, I think I will have to file for SSD.

Perhaps, even worse, my emotional state continues to deteriorate. I now yell and scream at myself constantly every time something goes wrong. My apartment is a disaster. I manage to send out few resumes. I do some temp work as a concierge but no one will hire me for that type of work. And, my bad feet make it a poor career choice. I also suffer from epilepsy (petite mal), IBS and pre-diabetes that gave me a heart condition. Maybe it's best that I am on disability. (I am still on unemployment.) I guess it's the best choice - I am suffering terribly. Comments would be appreciated. Thanks.

I know exactly how you feel. I was in the same situation 9 years ago. Someone brought up the idea of going on disability and I was totally against it at first. But then I realized that I had a serious problem and I needed to deal with it. Your not going to be driving a mercedes
while on disability but you can survive ok if you watch your money wisely. Many times you can get rent subsidies and other things that can help you financially. It took awhile but I was finally able to get things back into order and return to school full-time. I would not been able to do this if I wasn't on disability. You don't need to use disability for the rest of your life just until you get back on track. When it comes to looking for work employers don't need to know about your disability.

I had people do that to me at jobs also. I honestly think that people can "sense" if someone has a mental disability, even if it's not outright obvious, and they tend to bully them.

You are in very tough circumstances, and my heart goes out to you. Getting SSDI is not always decided on how deserving the person is. It can be all about how well prepared your claim is.

I only say this because I am in somewhat the same position and have researched what's involved. The reading can be painful, but try to research this on the web. It's better to know what you're up against, so you can improve your chances of success. You can get the services of a lawyer with no up-front fee. They take their fee out of what you get down the road. I am planning to call a law firm back that I contacted once in the past just asking about this. It scares me. Yes, SSDI is not a lot and, like you, I too would be poor with that as my main/only income. But, I am getting scared about not being able to perform well at the jobsite.

Feel free to PM me if you care to. Meantime, I will be hoping to see you finding your wauy along in the process. ((((Hugs))))

if you do that and get it you mite ask them if you could get both ssi to my son get both

You can get SSI, also, if your SSD is low enough. However, your SSD would have to be awfully low. If you have any work history at all, you probably would not be that low. Just being below the poverty line is not even low enough.

The main thing you need for the SSD is a good paper trail of you needing treatment for your psych issues. Also, it helps if your pdoc can see a relationship between your psych issues and your problems at work. I was told by a lawyer that having a "supportive" pdoc can be crucial.

My disability claim was approved this week. It was my first claim and I hired a lawyer. The whole thing took about 6 months - without a lawyer I think it can take twice as long.

Feel free to IM me with any questions.

Peace,

TnT

Thanks, everyone. I have met with a counselor at a local poverty center. She advised that I provide all my my MDs names. In addition to anxiety, depression and PTSD, I also suffer from a heart condition, IBS, epilepsy and problem feet that make walking painful. I am going to file in 2 weeks. In the meantime, I have been making MD appointments so that my records are up to date. We will see what happens. Congrats thickntired on being approved!