My wife wants me to drop SSDI and work

It sounds like your wife is wanting you to go back and try what has already been tried. Having gone through all you went through to get SSDI, I think it would be a step backwards do that. Your plan to wait and use that Ticket to Work Program sounds like very sensible to me. Ultimately, it sounds safer for her, too.

I hope your family can stay together. If your wife is actually willing to walk out now, if you don't give up SSDI, imagine how much quicker she will walk out, if you do give up SSDI and then fail at the job you take.

I've heard there are "benefits counselors" out there. Maybe you could find out about getting access to one and further discuss your plan. Such a counselor might also advice both you and your wife of the risks of doing what she proposes. She might listen to the counselor more attentively.