Can't do it anymore - SS Diss is only option...

After 25 years fighting debilitating Depression, a dozen Psych Docs, and years of enough meds to qualify me as a Human Lab rat, I'm just flat done fighting. By some miracle and a lot of lies, I've managed to hold a job at several companies since I was 17 years old but I just can't do it anymore. I'm only 45, but my Chronic Severe Depression has just progressed to the point that working is no longer an option. My cognitive ability has become so degraded and my condition so treatment resistant that I'm gonna have to throw in the towel on my career and shoot for SS Disability. Then again even with all my documentation and clinical history I'm not even sure I could get SS Disability. Are there any long term sufferers here like me that have gotten SS Disability as young as 45? From what I've researched it's next to impossible to get SS Disability for even long term and severe Clinical Depression. Not to mention of how I'm going to jump through all the legal hoops and endless paperwork needed when just getting up to take a piss involves more work than my mind can handle. I have no family with means to support me so does the government just relinquish you to living on the street? My only saving grace is that since age 17 I've always made a healthy wage and have paid a lot of money for long time into Social Security... Not sure is that makes any difference. I fought like Hell working as long as I could, but I really can't do my job or any job anymore. What do you do when you know the fight is over? How do you live?

I'm on SSDI but my disorder is a bit different so I won't comment on the chance of getting SSDI.

I do want to challenge you on your perception that the fight is over....No, its not over in the least. SSDI isn't "throwing in the towel" Rather, it enables you to focus on your healing so that you can get to a better place in life without having to go to work 40 hours a week. I know that the vast majority of those who are on SSDI will be on for life, but there are those of us who are determined to get better, are getting better, and will be able to be a heck of a lot more productive in the future. SSDI is in no way, shape, or form a death trap.

Thanks... I will have to look into it further because as you said, it's gotten too hard for me to focus the effort needed in attempt to feel better while working a demanding job. It really sucks because I'm damn good at my work, but I'm failing at it simply because of my condition.

Have you ever felt like, "I was robbed because if I never developed this damn condition, then there's no question I would have become a great success in life?" It's like God played a cruel joke on me to gift me with talent and then tossed in this chronic condition as a near complete road block to utilize that talent in an effective manner. Of all things I think that pisses me off the most.

My psychiatrist and therapist recommended that I apply for Social Security Disability after a three-year struggle with bipolar disorder...I was deteriorating despite trying my best. The stress from practicing law was making it much worse and I had already gone part-time. I am 44 now and I applied in 2009 online and was approved two months later.

I've in no way "given up" on getting better although I do not see myself being able to work again.

Best wishes to you - hang in there...xo

Start calling some of those law firms that advertize on TV and on the Net - the big nationwide firms that just do disability. You'll probably get a return call from a paralegal who'll give you excellent feedback on your chances. Call several. It doesn't cost anything, and they will be glad to hear from you.

It is a lot harder at age 45 than at age 55. Getting fired from jobs will help you better than you quitting. Be careful about you "throwing in the towel" on your employment. SSA would be much more impressed if your employer had to call men in white coats to drag you out if there. They want to see evidence of failure on the job.