Benefits/welfare problems.

That's excellent, Marylin! Being proactive is good!

Fightback4justice legal team are going to do the Mandatory Reconsideration for me if I am refused PIP.We can't do anything though until the decision is sent to me by the DWP.I am dreading them saying I am refused PIP cos then my money goes down and I may be refused MR and then it can take up to a year struggling with little money to get a date for appeal court.Meanwhile I have to go to the GP and arrange to gain access to my medical records and print them off.I also have to get old care plans out and send them for MR too.I am getting nervous and worked up but the legal team are behind me.What gives me hope is if they were going to refuse me PIP based on the assessor's report they could have written to me straight away and told me so they might be looking into it more carefully and offer me something,I am hoping so anyway.They would have saved money by refusing me straight away.So I don't know we will see.I might have to wait another two or three weeks for a decision.I hope I don't hear until the first week in June so I can collect another DLA payment 29 May.

Marylin could you sign an authorization for your legal team to get all that for you. It might be a LOT easier on you.

No Deejay,they don't collect medical records etc the legal team,I have to collect it and send it to them and they will write the MR<I have the care plans etc,I just need to get the medical records,it isn't hard to do,just involves filling in a form at the drs and making an appointment to look through my computer records and get them printed off.

I haven't had a decision from the DWP yet,I had a letter on friday telling me they had all the information that they need to make a decision and that I will be hearing from them shortly.I hope it will be another two weeks until I hear cos I am due a payment in two weeks and if they are going to stop my money I want that payment first.Fingers crossed,I get that payment and that it is good news that they base their decision on the other evidence and not the assessor's report!

I should get a decision within or after the next two weeks.I am extremely anxious.I don't want to lose my next DLA payment I think I will still get it 29 May even if I am refused an award cos you get one more payment after the decision before they stop it.If I get the decision after the 29th May and they stop my award I should be entitled to one more payment at the end of June so I hope it works out that way.I still hope my award won't stop but even if it does I have a good chance of getting it back at MR or appeal.I haven't heard from my Member of Parliament whom I asked for help 18 days ago,it does usually take a while for him to get back to me but I haven't heard from him as yet.

I know I am scared but until the decision comes through there is nothing I can do to fight it,the sooner I can contest the decision if it is not in my favour the better I will feel.

I am getting prepared for if I have to do MR,Friday I am going to the GP to fill in an access to medical records form,they will then send me an appointment to view and print off medical records that will support my claim.Also I am going to the internet cafe to make copies of my care plans and letters and the assessors report.So that will help me work off anxious energy doing stuff that I need for the MR to send to my legal team at Fightback 4 justice.I was messaging my niece on facebook,she is very supportive.She is coming home and I will see her 2nd week of July,she is in Los Angeles at this time studying at UCLA.

I still haven't heard back from my MP I asked him for help with my benefits claim,it usually takes him about a month to get back to me but I am wondering if he will ignore my plea for help because he voted to reduce the welfare budget,so whether he sees me as a burden on the state I don't know?

I am never so worried as I am when they threaten to cut my benefits,last time they switched me from income support to ESA I was ill from the stress and went into psychosis,when I came out of hospital I ended up on more money not less,so worrying and being ill was for nothing but still you don't know in today's climate when they have assessors doing inadequate reports and outright lying on the reports they will take your entitlement and allow you to struggle and not care that it takes months to go to appeal.They do this hoping you will give up your claim cos it is too hard to pursue it their aim is to save money at the expense of the ill and disabled.

I am not going to give up no matter how long it takes.

Good for you! Keep going strong!!

Getting apprehensive now I should hear what the DWP decision is in the next two weeks,feeling worried and tense.Try to stay strong whatever happens!Thanks for your support Deejay!

I went to the GP today and filled in an access to records form,I wrote exactly what records I wanted printed out and they said they could do them,I had to pay £25, I will get a phone call on Monday to say they are ready.If they are ready I am going to collect them on Tuesday.I am hoping I don't get a letter from the DWP until after the 29th May still.
Fightback4justice know all the rights of disabled people and they say they get 80% of no award decisions overturned at MR stage and win 100% of appeals at tribunal.So I think if I go with them I am in good hands.

Wow Marylin,
You've gone from being a wreck over this to actively working on your case....that's real progress. It's always worth giving it your best effort that way there won't be room for the "what if's". Those only add to the stress. I think you've got a real good handle on this now. Action feels a whole lot better than worrying yourself to bits. Kudos to you!!!

I am depressed again today and I still feel really alone....it feels isolating,to be honest I don't show it but I am desperate for love and attention.I feel unsupported.I am disappointed cos last month I asked my MP for support with my benefit claim but he hasn't replied to me.It does usually take him 3-4 weeks to reply when I ask his support on other issues but I feel he won't want to help me cos he has consistently voted to reduce the welfare budget so why would he care about me?I said to him a year or two ago I was on benefits and worried cos the government seems to want people who are seriously disabled to work and I can't and he said if I needed help he would help me but he hasn't replied so I am not going to pester him,I might go to a constituent surgery if I decide on 7th June,maybe he expects me to ask him in person.I might try that.

Also I asked my niece three times in two months to write a letter saying how I struggle with my mobility and how she helps me for the DWP as a supporting letter and she has said she will but she hasn't bothered.Yet when I say I am worried she says stay calm I am here for you I support you and I know it's scary she says try stay calm she says.Yet she doesn't bother to write the letter for me, so I reckon she is only talking support but not really bothering.She is in LA studying but it wouldn't take her longer than an hour to write a letter find a post office and post it,she can't be bothered and doesn't rally care is what it sound like is nearer to the truth to me.Over the years I have gone to a lot of effort and spent a lot on her to show her a good time and make her feel loved and this is her feelings towards me that she can't be bothered.I am disappointed but I still love her.

I shouldn't complain at least I will have the help of Fightback 4 justice.I have to try and stay mentally strong and start putting myself first from now on.

I got the DWP decision letter.I have been refused PIP which is the reply I was expecting.I will ring tuesday 29 May and book the legal team at welfare rights to do my mandatory reconsideration.They will write it based on the evidence that I send them,medical records I will obtain and send to them next week.They will send the MR for me to DWP special delivery signed for and tracked and a copy to me.Then it can take up to 12 weeks for them to reply.If still no award I have to appeal to tribunal judges.I will have to survive on £220 a fortnight for anything from four months to a year.it is going to be hard hopefully I will win.

I do feel disappointed even though I was expecting it....am depressed and worried already feeling ill and worn down,the garden hedges are overgrown and I have to cut them myself as I can no longer pay for a gardener.It seems like i am going back to the bad old days where I couldn't do stuff myself and didn't have the money to pay to get them done either.I am going to be seriously ill again without money or help,deja vu.Help!

I think I had the worst shock five weeks ago when I received a copy of the assessors report and saw that she didn't score me enough points to be awarded.I was so upset back then,but at least I was ready to be let down when the final decision came through.I had adjusted by then to the news I had just received.I still have to manage on a lot less and won't be able to eat as much as I do now.I have to cut my shopping budget in half.Bills will get paid but there will be very little for transport and spending money to get through until next pay day.Horrific nightmare,I will have to go without and stay at home more....I will concentrate on watching DVDs,writing and art and reading my books,gardening,housework.I have to get through this with a positive attitude or else I will be physically ill which will cause mental decline and possibly psychosis.I want to avoid that happening.I have been without money before and it was hard I got seriously ill.Please God it doesn't get that bad again.

Today was good.I went to town to buy pads and bread and milk.I enjoy a drink at the coffee shop.I bumped into a gardener on my way out asking the taxi driver for directions.He offered to cut my hedges,and he came back later and did so.I hedge was massive and he made it a lot smaller and the other got trimmed but it needs reducing when I have the money.Both got cut though it cost me £50 but I was really happy cos it would have been really hard work to do them by hand and I would have needed 20 hours manual labour which is nigh on impossible for a disabled person like me.I would have got exhausted and distress and very very depressed if I had had to do it myself.So the gardener was a Godsend.Also I have his number now and unlike the Age UK gardener I don't have to have him come round regularly I can just phone him to come do odd jobs in the garden dept.

Also today I decided to go see my MP in person he is holding a surgery June 8th,and I will ask him to help me get them to reinstate my benefit.I don't know if he will agree to help but I am going to give it a try and try to keep a positive frame of mind.

Keep going Marylin! You're doing great!

Thank you Deejay and I appreciate your support and words of encouragement,it means a lot to me lovely!

I am sorry to hear to PIP has been refused. Fingers crossed that the phone call on the 29th will set better cogs in motion for you.

Gardening can be an unseen expense. Finding the right gardener for the right price can be tricky. I used to have one that would arrive at 7am and trim the hedge. The hedge is long and tall and out of my reach physically. Pleased that you could find a more suitably priced gardener and one that you can contact on a needs basis.

I find that the local library is a good source for books and DVD's for free. There is always free stuff around. Even local councils have community centres that offer classes and courses and opportunities. I assume that the UK would be much the same?

Your MP is there to serve his constituents. That's what he gets elected for and paid for. Help him to fulfill his role as a member of Parliament.

Well funny you should say that about my MP Possum.His office got back to me today and his assistant says they will open a case file with the DWP marked urgent and try to help.He said they didn't get he email I sent 28 days ago and only got it when I resent it last week we will see if they are any help.

I was about to book the MR today with Fightback4Justice when Atos phoned me and said they had informed DWP about my complaint and DWP have requested they do another assessment,so they booked me in for Tuesday 19 June this time with a mental health nurse instead of a paramedic.Fightback4justice legal eagle Michelle says this is very good news and rarely happens.She is going to phone me the week before to prepare me for the assessment.I am nervous having to go through it again but it is another opportunity to state my case and this time I have more of an idea what to expect and what I need to say to make them take my case seriously.It has been exhausting today I went to the bank and sorted loads of stuff and I was going to go tomorrow and get my medical records and send all to fightback for them to do the MR but I don't have to rush to do that now.
I am seriously tired and although my mum is supportive she is 87 and I don't want to go on and on to her I am alone with it all and feel the strain.Nevertheless it is hopeful news as my legal eagle said and I feel God's hand at work.Tomorrow I am having a day off from stress and worry and I will go see a film and have a meal and just try to switch off and relax.
I want to get ready for the next home assessment and I want to get chores done and spring clean my home for when my niece comes home from studying in LA.
I have learnt not to take things for granted,to be more careful with my finances and to be more mindful in my life,so I am using my time wisely and not vegetating.This benefits business has been a massive wake up call and I feel God's hands at work.This is stressful but a learning experience.

Excellent news!! You can do this one step at a time. Take time to breathe in between tasks, even if it's just 5 minutes.