Transgenderic problems with body

I've got a pretty complex and difficult problem. I'm a transgender girl, but I don't want to change my sex. Still though, I feel imprisoned in my body, because I treat it like a tool to communicate with surrounding and society, and female body just doesn't express me, doesn't express my personality. The body often has been an obstacle for me if it comes to contacts with people. I've been stigmatized because I haven't behaved like a girl. I'm also really tired of such a talking like "you're quite .... for a girl" or "you shouldn't/can't do (this and that) because you're a girl". I don't feel accepted by a great majority of people. My problem lies in the way that society percieves me just taking sex into consideration. Because of that I can't be my true self. I guess there's nothing I can do if it comes to taking action, but I can change my point of view, and that's what I'm asking for.

Hey there FrauMeyer. Your problem is pretty common actually.

I know how you feel. I'm a transmasculine femme, and I get a lot of people saying "You dont act very manly. You're really girly for a guy."

Even within the lgbtqa+ community. Hopefully we can support you through this
Sometimes we have to make a change ourselves. And we'll be here for you!

It can be very difficult to navigate the assumptions that get made about us because of the cultural associations people have with certain kinds of bodies. There are increasing numbers of people who recognize the complexity of gender and will be able to understand you for who you are, without the limitations of gender or offensive stereotypes. However, most people are not aware of "gender queer" identities and still think of gender in a very stereotypical way. I hope you can find some places and people where you have support to be yourself outside of the binary.

Hey FrauMeyer (yay German names ),

I can relate to what you write, not that I have a solution for it. I have had quite the argument with myself trying to figure out why it is that I want HRT -- is this something I truly want for myself, or is it something I want to make it easier for society to accept me as male (I'm afab)? And I think it is a bit of both. I accept that, even though I suspect that my desire for HRT is partly because I, too, have been socialized to "believe" in certain stereotypes and gendered ideals. I'm very, very critical of these ideals, but I guess this type of thing is hard to unlearn.

Sorry, I'm rambling. To live in your true gender without conforming to the expectations that society has about it can be hard -- but it is not impossible! Don't feel pressured to modify your body in ways you're not comfortable with. It's easier said than done, I know.