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#1
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I've only recently come out as trans (ftm) and I've been lucky in that most people are being suportive, and most others going along with it even if they don't get it or aren't really supportive... But I do know a few people who just really don't seem able to understand or accept at all.
I was round at a mates yesterday and after the constant misgendering and mentions of how it was wrong because I'm such a 'beautiful/lovely woman' (I think part of the problem is that he finds me attractive and coming from a religious Irish background that's very confusing for him if I'm a guy) had been going on for quite a while my other mate tried to explain that he shouldn't keep saying that, which lead into a rather heated debate about why I'm chosing to transition - not helped by us all being varying stages of drunk. It was really stressful to try and get the point across that this is something I need to do, and that I don't really give a toss what anyone else thinks because I have to be able to live with myself. Although my more supportive mate said that I did exactly the right thing by just yelling at him until he shut up and listened (because that fits with his idea of how a guy should act). I'm really not good with confrontation, partly because I used to have a lot of issues with losing my temper and getting violent when I did. Of course after I left and sobered up a bit I came up with all the points and better explanations I should've made, so hopefully I'll remember them in the future... I'm sure I'll be having plenty of similar experiences... |
![]() Anonymous200440, Anonymous48690, ArtsySkeleton, Skeezyks
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#2
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Omg, just talking to drunks is hard enough that I don't even bother anymore. It's like, "call me in the morning when you're sober sweety and we'll talk then, bye."
I'm glad for you that it didn't get any crazier then that. Some idiots just want to go on and on and on on business that just ain't their business. It all depends on the guy I guess, some would just say whatever and walk away, others would start pushing and shoving, others would just get drunk with the drunk. A man's world is whatever you make of it and make it stick. ![]() |
![]() DaveJ
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#3
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I'm glad you're able to not give a toss, DaveJ. That has always been my downfall. I never had the self-confidence or the courage to do so... I envy those who can. Congratulations on becoming your true self!
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__________________
"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last) |
#4
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Well I've always been the weird one who doesn't really fit in and has very few friends, so while choosing to transition won't be easy at least I'll be 'weird' and not fit in in a way that might actually make me feel better about myself...
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![]() Skeezyks
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#5
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Why do you need to explain to people who are not able to hear you?
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#6
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Perhaps I don't need to... but I've never found it easy to make friends, and living in a small town in Ireland being transgender certainly isn't going to make that any easier, so why not make a bit of an effort to explain to the people I already know and get on with...
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![]() Bill3
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#7
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Thanks for your response. I expect you might get better results if they are sober at the time.
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#8
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I'm sure you're right there, easier said than done though :P
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![]() Bill3
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