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Location: NYC
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#21
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Location: Germany
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#22
Hi, I have the same problem. I know exactly what it feels like to get no attention from girls. I'm 24 now, and there seems to be no improvement in sight.
But here's the thing. Do you honestly think that just by getting a girlfriend magically fixes anything? For example, I had always thought that I was unhappy because I've never had a girlfriend, had no money and was still a virgin. Well, with a bit of luck I somehow managed to fix two of these problems, and my assumption turned out to be rather foolish and naive. Having money doesn't fix your personal insecurities and definitely doesn't make you happy. Sex and the whole virginity thing is severely overrated by society, you'll realize eventually. As for relationships.. I don't know for sure but I stopped idealizing it. Still, it was such a valuable enlightenment to realize that sex is no big deal and that, theoretically, I could get it anytime I want (by paying for it that is...). It didn't make me feel better at all, just opened my eyes that the problem is of far deeper nature. One that wouldn't be as easy to fix by simply completing a silly achievement. But this is like, just my point of view on it man |
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#23
Hey bud, I just wanted to add my 2 cents.
- First time I kissed a girl (actually, she kissed me) I was 23. Met the girl on an Amtrak train ... no BS ! - At 24, I got into my first and only serious relationship. We were in love, almost got married. That lasted about a year. - Since then, I've been in numerous month-long attempts at relationships, meeting girls in a myriad of random ways (the latest was at a furniture store ... she offered up her #) The point is ... random stuff happens over time ! You're too young to be anxious or worried about not having a girl. As Webgoji said, people your age (esp girls, if you ask me) don't yet know who they are or what they want, and that will change ! I know how you feel ... I've been in exactly that spot. And it ain't fun, but it ain't permanent ... nothing is. Give it some time ... your true personality and identity will come out. In the meantime, enjoy your youth, and work on yourself (your career for example). You are bound to run into some chick, someday, who will want to take you home and use you for anatomy class. Your life is just beginning. Countless experiences await you. Come back to this thread when you're my age (31) ... your wife probably won't let you |
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Member Since Dec 2014
Location: Germany
Posts: 74
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#24
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The train seems like such a bad place to meet people. Everyone is just listening to music, reading books, texting messages or just doing their own thing. Everyone seems to be annoyed, just wanting to arrive at their destination asap. How the hell did you meet somebody in an environment like that? |
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#25
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Member
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: Germany
Posts: 74
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#26
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Junior Member
Member Since Nov 2014
Location: NYC
Posts: 20
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#27
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Member Since Nov 2014
Location: NYC
Posts: 20
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#28
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#29
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Another thing I wanted to mention is ... priorities change as you get older. When you're at your age or in your early twenties, it's all about looks and being cool and stuff. When you're older (and the girls you attract are older), it becomes more about things like your career (are you financially stable and successful ?), your health, and whether or not you would make a good partner (perhaps a husband). Those "cool" guys and the assholes in high school and college who think they're hot **** will someday be working for minimum wage at Walmart, and if you're serious about your career, you might be the general manager of some large company, and guess who the chicks will come around to ? YOU. So, what I'm trying to say is ... girls your age may just look for "cool" guys, but as you get older, they'll come around, and when they do, it would help if you have your life in order (career, health, emotional stability, etc). So working on yourself is very important, not just for the girls ... do it for yourself. |
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#30
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Maybe you're not very confident with girls, but you're very intelligent, and that will help you with your career and, in later life, with finding a long-term partner (most women like intelligence, at least in later life). |
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Junior Member
Member Since Nov 2014
Location: NYC
Posts: 20
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#31
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Anonymous200145
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Member Since Nov 2014
Location: Denver
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#32
"Those "cool" guys and the assholes in high school and college who think they're hot **** will someday be working for minimum wage at Walmart, and if you're serious about your career, you might be the general manager of some large company, and guess who the chicks will come around to ? YOU."
This really hit home for me, when, several years out of high school, I was walking down the street in my old neighborhood, when out of the blue, someone was saying, "HI" to me and when I turned to look, it was the high school football star who was in the process of unloading the beer truck he was driving for a living. Not that there's anything wrong with driving a beer truck, per se, but in the years since knowing him in high school, so much had changed in our lives and I definitely wasn't driving a beer truck for a living! Last edited by Mygrandjourney; Jan 12, 2015 at 04:42 PM.. Reason: Clarity/context |
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#33
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Member Since Jan 2015
Location: The Moon
Posts: 67
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#34
Yup, most of the dudes I know who were slaying it in high school are still living with their moms (who I'm sure are very sweet ladies, but dudes, we're in our mid-twenties).
The guys who buckled down and treated everyone with respect and grew at their own pace while allowing others to do the same are all in loving, positive relationships right now. I was the same way at your age and you're handling it much better than I did. __________________ "Some men choose to chase women. Other men choose to chase aesthetics. If you're wondering which way to go, remember your muscles will never wake up and tell you they don't love you anymore." - Socrates |
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Junior Member
Member Since Nov 2014
Location: NYC
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#35
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Anonymous200145, Space Wizard
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Member Since Jan 2015
Location: The Moon
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#36
You've got this, brother. Lift some weights (it's fun, I promise), learn about the world around you, and focus on improving yourself and being good to the people around you.
I know that's all pretty cliche, but it's cliche for a reason. Like I said - you've got this. __________________ "Some men choose to chase women. Other men choose to chase aesthetics. If you're wondering which way to go, remember your muscles will never wake up and tell you they don't love you anymore." - Socrates |
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Phantom129
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Location: usa
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#37
im attractive
intelligent 25 and single never had a first kiss or anyone to hold hands with some things just take time worry about other things rather than being single __________________ |
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Anonymous200145
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Junior Member
Member Since Nov 2014
Location: NYC
Posts: 20
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#38
Trust me, I try to. The problem is that I am always reminded of the fact that I'm still single, whether it be seeing happy couples or seeing attractive girls that don't even look my way. I realize that I'm still young but I could imagine that most guys have at least had one girlfriend or at least a close female friend by my age. I can't say that I have had either.
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Junior Member
Member Since Feb 2015
Location: Fairfax VA
Posts: 11
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#39
you're so young i wouldnt sweat it so much. in a few yours you will grow and be a completely different person just work on being the best person you can be and the girls will come. everyone gets shot down by women so don't be afraid.
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Junior Member
Member Since Nov 2014
Location: NYC
Posts: 20
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#40
I know that I'm young but it still sucks. All of the teenage memories like taking girls to prom, having your first kiss, and having a girlfriend are things that I'll never get to experience. It's been getting me down a lot lately. I already have a good personality, at least I think I do. Most adults that talk to me tell me that I'm respectful, polite, and well-spoken. I'm known as a good kid. I already have self-esteem issues and insecurities, so the fact that I'm a social and romantic failure makes it even worse. Most guys my age have girlfriends and a social life, I just want to feel normal.
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