[Dan208]

My wife and I have bought several "toys" over the years. Everything from penis rings to vibrators to movies.

Anyway, she is too indecisive to order anything, so she told me to surprise her. I really want to buy a male masturbator but for some reason it really embarrasses me. I can't figure out why, because we've gotten her vibrators and dildos in the past and I use them on her with no problem.

Any thoughts on how to get over this? Should I just pull the trigger and order one?

[CANDC]

I am not an expert by any means but intimacy and developing a sincere feeling of warmth and caring can last way longer than just sex can do. Rather than look for more technology, more closeness can go a long way.

Start with a non sexual massage or caressing, move into other sensual areas to explore. feel each other's breath. look in each other's eyes. Maybe she just wants intimacy?

[Webgoji]

I think there's a societal concept that men aren't supposed to use sex toys and that impedes a lot of experimenting. Basically even though it has nothing to do with "needing help", men are supposed to get their needs filled by women and not need other sources of stimulation so that might be what you're struggling with.

(And if you're like me it almost feels like some kind of weird cheating. Seriously, it's the strangest psychological reaction I've ever had.)

Personally I think you'll just have to bite the bullet and order it. Just power through by willpower. That embarrassment is probably really ingrained and it'll take just jumping off the cliff to get past it.

[mountain human]

I'm curious now on what her reaction will be when she sees it, hopefully won't make her feel insecure...

[Dan208]

Originally Posted by mountain human

I'm curious now on what her reaction will be when she sees it, hopefully won't make her feel insecure...

Since she has her own toys, I doubt it will.

[Mike_J]

Just my thought. Don't order one go buy one in person. YES it's EMBARRASSING but that is also part of the thrill. You could see if your wife would go with you and each of you has to buy a toy for yourself and one for the other person.

[Dan208]

Originally Posted by Mike_J

Just my thought. Don't order one go buy one in person. YES it's EMBARRASSING but that is also part of the thrill. You could see if your wife would go with you and each of you has to buy a toy for yourself and one for the other person.

I've tried to get her to go into the adult store with me, but she still won't do it. I showed her what I was planning on getting the other day and she didn't seem phased by it. She just said wait until the 8th (when she pays off last months credit card bill) to order.