why is it all so hard?...

I am nearly 18 years old....most people consider this to be the best age...finishing school, going to university, socializing and having the time of your life. So why should I have to watch everyone else my age having a great time and having so much fun while I'm too busy recking myself and falling to pieces? I can imagine what you're thinking...another teenager who loves attention and thinks she has "real problems". Well I wish that was the case..but things are a little more complicated...I have been suffering from trichotillomania since i was 9 years old. I wore a scarf on my head for 3 years and when I reached junior high I decided it was time to take it off for good..I tried really hard to stop and I actually did for a year..but then it came back again...I was practically bald and felt really down all the time...when I reached high school I successfully stopped. My hair started growing back and within two years It had reached down my shoulders...It was s beautiful and precious.. I appreciated every bit of it...I was happy and relaxed...but then came another problem. I started picking my skin. It got so bad that I now have scars that will remain for life...Apparently there is a name for this. It's called "dermatillomania". It is similar to trichotillomania. I am now in the last year of high school. And I have never been worse. I started pulling my hair out again early this year and am now like i used to be 6 years ago...my precious hair is once again gone and so has my self-esteem...I have also developed "binge eating" which is a disorder that causes you to eat huge amounts of food with no control. I have gained 6 kg in about 4 weeks...I eat until I am sick and then cry and hate myself...and then I eat more...and then I pull my hair out... every day is so hard. I have so much I have to cope with....I have been depressed for quite a while now. I feel useless and often suicidal. I know I need help. But I sometimes feel uncomfortable to open up to people...
If you have similar problems or want to talk do not hesitate...
Thanks for reading...

Dannii, welcome to PsychCentral (PC)!

I do not think you are "another teenager who loves attention and thinks she has 'real problems' ". I do think your "most people consider this to be the best age" is misguided as is your thought that "everyone else my age" is having a great time and so much fun.

I don't think more than a handful of the thousands of members here at PsychCentral consider their 18th year their best age, nor did they have a great time then and so much fun. Besides, you have to get beyond 18 to judge whether it was the best years of your life yet and of those around you; things could get worse :-)

Any joking aside, quite a few people here have trichotillomania and dermatillomania and I hope they respond to this post too and share their coping skills. This is a great site for finding support for our mental health problems. I hope you can find a therapist to work with in your day-to-day world and get some help and support with your very real symptoms.

Binge eating is not fun/easy either. I'm active on another site, Spark People, that has a lot of people with every different problem one can imagine who are trying to lose weight and get healthy, including at least almost 3000 binge eaters from all over the world and has the tools to help you address eating issues:

http://www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/g...l.asp?gid=1323

Many Spark People members have lost 50, some even 100's of kgs of weight and tell their stories: http://www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/g...l.asp?gid=1900

There is hope! You have taken a good step coming here and posting.

Hi Dannii. I'm 20 and have had trich since I was about 12 or 13. I certainly didn't find 18 my best year at all, life feels so much better now I'm out of school and at university - I've met some amazing people here after managing to convince myself when I was a teenager that I'd end up alone, so there is hope!

If you're heading off to university after the summer, I'd recommend checking out any counselling services they offer - I got referred to a Cognitive Behavioural Therapist through a counsellor here and it's helping a lot so far, managed to quit for over five weeks which is something I hadn't been able to do for quite some time!

Other than therapy, though, the main thing that helps me is trying to keep my hands away from my head completely wherever possible. I've resorted to wearing a glove on my free hand when I'm studying at my desk - looks stupid, but seems to help.

Hello Dannii, and welcome to PC.
I too struggle with dermatillomania, pick the skin/scabs on my face, fingers and body. Very frustrating! I have still not found a successful way to cope with it, so I'm afraid I have no advice for you. Just wanted you to know you are not alone.

I agree with Rio, take advantage of counselling services. They can be very useful.