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#1
Dec 08, 2015, 10:52 AM
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So I realized I have been beginning to feel more depressed lately. I have bad agoraphobia. I am a severe hypochondriac and was looking up illnesses online about two months ago, saw something I thought I could have, went to ER, and they said I do have it. So I was a nervous wreck over that. Now, 2 months later, I have constant anxiety about whether my symptoms are anxiety related or whether they are actually really part of the illness.
I have had severe anxiety and OCD for a long time but ever since I quit work and school due to all this I have started to get suicidal thoughts. I have talked to my therapist about them and have discussed with her that I believe that they are obsessions rather than true thoughts because I am terrified of them. They are usually fleeting and I worry intently about what having them could mean. I worry that I will become severely depressed and not be able to control myself, or that I am undiagnosed bipolar and could kill myself that way. They don't have to do with a specific plan or anything like that just more general thoughts. But my OCD brain can't let them go because right now I AM experiencing some hopelessness and helplessness, some guilt, sadness, other feelings that go along with depression. I am isolated most of the day now but that's not unlike how I was before this all, but before I had job/school to go to. It is hard to leave the house or do any activities because my anxiety symptoms flare up and I end up attributing it to the illness ER said I had in my anxious state, even though I'm pretty sure it isn't related to that. So my OCD is latching onto real feelings I'm having of depression and creating the suicidal obsessions and they are very scary and adding to my anxiety level even more. Has anyone else ever had suicidal obsessions? How did you KNOW they were obsessions? Also does anyone have OCD and depression together? What's the best way you manage it? Thanks.
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Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder ("Pure O" Type), Social Anxiety Rx: Lorazepam PRN |
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#2
Dec 08, 2015, 11:16 AM
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Hi defying gravity. I have had some success stopping my routines when I become aware of them and realize they are unnecessary. Mindfulness is the tool I use to get there.
This article may be a help Living with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder | Psych Central
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Super Moderator Community Support Team "Things Take Time" |
 defyinggravity65
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#3
Dec 08, 2015, 12:07 PM
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Quote:
__________________
Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder ("Pure O" Type), Social Anxiety Rx: Lorazepam PRN |
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