So I got diagnosed with OCD when I was about 15 or 16. Ever since I remember I have counted, I remember when I would get dressed I would count the seconds it took me to put on each clothing, count the seconds it took me to do tasks. Id count when I walked, mostly to the number 4. It progressed from counting when I walked to walking in patterns on the pavement. I began getting very anxious if there was a complicated pattern or if I could not carry out the pattern or the pattern keeps changing. Id have to go back and restart the pattern because I felt like if I kept to the patterns I was invisible and if I didnt it was like I dont know how to describe this but like the government could see into my soul and that they might come kill me or my mum. I also had problems with checking things especially locks, Id walk away and have to go back and check it about 7 times before I was satisfied, to the point where I got to uni and had to walk all the way home in order to check the lock (it was locked) and missed my lecture. So anyway that was what I was diagnosed with earlier on in life. I was just wondering, I dont know if this has anything to do with how I grew up, or my poor organisational skills or if its OCD. Growing up we were very poor, like no running hot water heating or toilet-poor so I really valued the things I was given and kept them a long time finding it hard to part with toys or clothes even if Id outgrown them. As Ive gotten older I have a real issue with throwing stuff away and I have boxes and boxes of stuff. I feel like its all stuff I really need, but like I went through a box of stuff today and filmed it like me giving an explaination of why I needed it and Im not sure whether its actually a decent enough excuse to keep it. I threw away 2 things, a plastic side of a sewing machine (I dont own a sewing machine) and an empty packet of chewing gum, but the rest Im not sure I just feel like I really NEED to keep it. Stuff I picked out of this box included crampons (it never snows here) a dead bee, maps of places Ill probably never go, reflective strip from a road cone, a handle from a bow but I dont know where the rest of it is and I live in a city, its not like I can go into debenhams car park and shoot stuff.. But I cannot bear to part with this stuff and it seems kind of rediculous actually trying to justify this stuff to you but yeah, is this a problem? Or does everyone keep stuff like this?
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