Why me?

JayS · Jul 04, 2009, 08:12 PM

I can see nobody want's me around... you're all scared of me but why?... I never did anything... I'm trying to be your friend but how can I when you don't want me... I know you're all talking about me through pm and it's not right... and someone is watching me, I was walking downstairs and there was this face staring at me... I think it was a man but I couldn't really tell cause it was all foggy but it was evil looking but had no face expression and no body... I looked away fast cause it scared me but when I looked again it was gone... I don't understand how it got in cause I spread salt around the house to stop evil from getting in.

Now I'm all by myself with no one to talk to cause everyone is ignoring me or you just can't see me.

gimmeice · Jul 04, 2009, 08:27 PM

((((((((((((( JayS )))))))))))))

I am sending you some hugs, I am sorry that you are feeling ignored hun.
I don't think anybody is purposely leaving you out of things.
Do you see a t? I think you should tell a t or dr that you are feeling the way you do.

Naturefreak · Jul 04, 2009, 08:43 PM

(((JayS)))

I don't think people are scared of you . I'm not . What I am scared about
is your safety . Seeing things is not good and if it was me , I would see a
professional PDoc as soon as possible. Take Care of yourself Jay .
I am your friend but I also don't want
to upset you by saying the wrong things. As you said before you take things the wrong way sometimes.
I hope you understand .

JayS · Jul 04, 2009, 09:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gimmeice

((((((((((((( JayS )))))))))))))

I am sending you some hugs, I am sorry that you are feeling ignored hun.
I don't think anybody is purposely leaving you out of things.
Do you see a t? I think you should tell a t or dr that you are feeling the way you do.

I don't have a T

JayS · Jul 04, 2009, 09:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Babysteps09

(((JayS)))

I don't think people are scared of you . I'm not . What I am scared about
is your safety . Seeing things is not good and if it was me , I would see a
professional PDoc as soon as possible. Take Care of yourself Jay .
I am your friend but I also don't want
to upset you by saying the wrong things. As you said before you take things the wrong way sometimes.
I hope you understand .

Some don't talk anymore so they must be scared and if they are then everyone is... and I'm not seeing things, it was there... and I do understand... you're scared to talk to me too.

JayS · Jul 05, 2009, 12:32 AM

I shouldn't have said anything at all

Elysium · Jul 05, 2009, 02:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JayS

Some don't talk anymore so they must be scared and if they are then everyone is... and I'm not seeing things, it was there... and I do understand... you're scared to talk to me too.

Jay....

I don't know you very well on here and I haven't talked with you much. As of now, I haven't had any experiences with you that would make me afraid of you. I do read your threads when I come to them, but I may not always leave a comment. But it's not personal. I do that with everybody here....it just depends on what state I'm in cause sometimes I don't feel like I have anything helpful to say and sometimes I don't feel like I'm worthy enough to share my opinion. Other times I might feel that something is over my head. I think most people here go through similar feelings when it comes to replying to threads.

As for what you stated in your above quote about if some people are scared to talk to you then everybody is.....I think that that is very black and white thinking....not allowing for any grey-in between reasoning. Sometimes I think like this too, but mostly lately when my PTSD/BPD symptoms become exacerbated.

Maybe it would be beneficial for you to seek out a T? (I don't know if you have had one before?) I think that it could help you process some of your thoughts and emotions and help you learn to find other ways to cope. Maybe help you see things from a different angle or perspective.

I'm glad you spoke up though. It wouldn't do anything for you to keep it inside. It would just eat you from the inside out.

Anyway, I hope you know I'm here for you. Take care!!

Naturefreak · Jul 05, 2009, 06:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JayS

Some don't talk anymore so they must be scared and if they are then everyone is... and I'm not seeing things, it was there... and I do understand... you're scared to talk to me too.

JayS , I just got up this morning to read this and I am so sorry you
feel this way . I said I was not scared to talk to you and I meant it.
I am not a Psychiatrist and I don't know what to say that would be
beneficial for you right now. If you want to talk I will listen but I
really don't know what to say that can help you. I'm just being honest.
Here are some hugs

that's all I have to offer right now.
Like others here have said I think it would help you alot to see someone
who is trained to deal with these things .
Take Care

Rachie · Jul 05, 2009, 07:44 AM

i dont think you're scary. I think you are a wonderful and loving person and i enjoy talking to you. Im sorry you are feeling this way. You know if you ever need to talk about anything you can pm me anytime

much love, Rachelle

JayS · Jul 05, 2009, 08:53 AM

I'm sorry everyone... I didn't mean to upset anyone... I know I need help.

Amazonmom · Jul 05, 2009, 11:19 PM

Some days just don't go so well.

It's okay. I am not afraid of you and I don't want to ignore you.

thinker22 · 12:20 AM

I've seen menacing faces too. It's scary. Sometimes night after night I knew that something like death was standing in the hallway or at the foot of my bed and waiting for me to fall asleep so it could kill me.

Definitely I would seek out a therapist and/or a p-doc who can help you out with this. I know I wouldn't be able to sleep at all if I hadn't sought help.

I'm not questioning what you saw at all and I totally relate to your experience, but what I can tell you is I've found a medication that has muted the voices, faces, and dark presences. You don't have to suffer with this alone. What we see is real, just as depression is real, and diseases and disorders are real, but they are treatable.

And after you find some resources to help you, you'll still be able to sense and protect yourself from harm in every day life. I used to worry my perception would be dulled, like I'd be a med zombie, but it makes life so much more manageable.

Sabrina · Jul 06, 2009, 05:10 AM

I don't know you Jay, but I am sorry you are going through this. Just wanted to let you know that.

JayS · Jul 06, 2009, 10:10 AM

gimmeice, Babysteps09, Elysium3006, Rachie, Amazonmom, thinker22, Sabrina

Thank you all for talking to me and caring.

paddym22 · Jul 06, 2009, 12:44 PM

Jay I dont know you but you shouldnt have to go through this and we are ALL right here beside you looking out for you

Paddy

Pomegranate · Jul 06, 2009, 05:10 PM

(((((((Jays)))))) Maybe the holiday got you down? Any kind of holiday always gets me at least a little down. Anway, I'm here and I'm not scared of you. You can PM me anytime, doesn't have to be about anthing special. Anytime you feel alone just PM someone, they'll answer and you can know we care.

susan888 · Jul 06, 2009, 05:24 PM

(((JayS)))) I'm not afraid to talk to you. I find you very insightful and sensitive the few times you have responded to my posts! Thank you for being on this board! You made me cry with your response to my Dad post. You do make a difference and I hope you feel better soon!!!

JayS · Jul 07, 2009, 01:53 AM

Thanks everyone... but I am okay, there is nothing wrong with me... I am good

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