[WantsSomsTruth]

Okay, at school, I keep hearing about fellow students hurting themselves, and I cannot seem to wrap my head around this. I really can't. I can't see how people actually harm themselves when things get hard and rough. I'm trying hard not to be judgmental (Which is what used to be a issue for myself) about this and just say that they're being cry babies. Because that's not what I think.

But at the same time, I'm so used to doing things because there's a propose for it. So, I don't see how it why should a person injure themselves on propose if there's no true benefit to anyone.

Or, because of my thinking/attitude, I may never understand? I don't want to say something wrong and being viewed as the asshole for it. Never realized that self-injury was common in schools. And I can't understand this, even though I want to know why it's commonplace.

... or maybe I think too much. sigh.

Originally Posted by WantsSomsTruth

Okay, at school, I keep hearing about fellow students hurting themselves, and I cannot seem to wrap my head around this. I really can't. I can't see how people actually harm themselves when things get hard and rough. I'm trying hard not to be judgmental (Which is what used to be a issue for myself) about this and just say that they're being cry babies. Because that's not what I think.

But at the same time, I'm so used to doing things because there's a propose for it. So, I don't see how it why should a person injure themselves on propose if there's no true benefit to anyone.

Or, because of my thinking/attitude, I may never understand? I don't want to say something wrong and being viewed as the asshole for it. Never realized that self-injury was common in schools. And I can't understand this, even though I want to know why it's commonplace.

... or maybe I think too much. sigh.

I don't believe self injury was a thing long ago.... but with todays issues, struggles and NOT getting treatment - I think THEY THINK that is the way out.
It's not okay - you see it - you realized it - you have came here and can find ways to relive the strain of life in others ways K

[Naturefreak]

Don't know what they could be thinking .
Maybe it's their way of coping with stress.
Maybe because they feel like they're in control.
I am happy to hear you are not doing this .
It is a sad thing . Take Care .....

[Typo]

A part of the reason someone does it is it is a stress relief, when your hurt the body releases endporphins to mask the pain, there is a slight rush or relief after someone harms themselves.

Sometimes the emotional pain we feel is so overwhelming, we lash out and cope in any way we can. Or in my case, I use to feel like I had to punish myself, that I had to punish myself for feeling, for remembering things.

It is hard to understand, but I'm glad your reaching out and trying to understand,

(((((((WantsomsTruth))))))))

[Pup]

Being a self harmer since age 7, but now recovering, or trying to, it is a way to cope, a way to relief, a way to escape, and a way to make it through the day... sometimes, it is a way to stop yourself from taking your own life... (even though it almost resulted in the death of my own) Others may even do it for attention... which means they feel they are not getting the attention they want/need from the ones they want/need it from, so they try and get it by harming themselves... doesn't always work out that way though...

It does get worse as times goes by... it's very dangerous in many cases... it may be a way to prevent suicide on oneself, but it can actually cause it as well...

The saying goes...
You can't/won't understand it unless you've been/gone/going/etc through it.

It's true...
you may never understand self harm, or other things, unless you've been there, done that... but you can TRY to... and that will give you a better perspective on it... a better outlook...

I'm left with permanent scars all over my body... and memories of times where I could have died... but yet, it stills tempts me... s'pose it's like an addiction... rather, is an addiction... it's awful, yes, but it's what happens a lot for so many out there...

[pachyderm]

Originally Posted by WantsSomsTruth

I don't see how it why should a person injure themselves on propose if there's no true benefit to anyone.

But as others have indicated, there may be some perceived "benefit", though maybe not what you would consider a "true" one...

[Seabirdanne]

On a (perhaps unconscious) level, a person is very angry. If the person is a child in a hostile family environment, instinct alone would tell the child not to act out in anger against the family -- to do so might mean injury or abandonment. But we are like pressure cookers and can only hold so much in; the pressure must be released. And so the anger is released, but at a safe target -- one's self. This is the root of at least some self-injury, and a lot of negative self-talk and self-hatred -- in my opinion, anyway. (I hurt myself in the 1970's, by the way, when I was in high school. There was no help back then; I eventually just stopped doing it.)

[VickiesPath]

This is some information that one of the answerers posted on the Q&A side recently. He was responding to a teen who was afraid of her urges to self-harm:

Here are some self help tips to avoid self harm:

If you self-injure to…Deal with anger that you cannot express openly, try working through those feelings by doing something different – running, dancing fast, screaming, punching a pillow, throwing something, ripping something apart

If you hurt yourself in order to…Feel something when you feel numb inside, hold ice cubes in one hand and try to crush them, hold a package of frozen food, take a very cold shower, chew something with a very strong taste (like chili peppers, raw ginger root, or a grapefruit peel), wear an elastic rubber band around your wrist and snap it (in moderation to avoid bruising) when you feel like hurting yourself

If you inflict physical pain to…Calm yourself, try taking a bubble bath, doing deep breathing, writing in a journal, drawing, or doing some yoga

If you self-mutilate to…See blood, try drawing a red ink line where you would usually cut yourself, in combination with the other suggestions above.


This gives an explanation of why someone might be driven to self-harm.

[Junerain]

You say you do everything for a 'purpose' I live my life quite the opposite- I do everything based on my emotions, my feelings, my soul, my heartache at not being understood, my spirituality..

I NEVER do anything for a cut and dry, PURPOSE!

People view life very, very differently...some are thinkers and mask their feelings..other wear their hearts on their sleeve and are more sensitive..

[AliceRain]

I don't understand either. A lot of people at my school cut or hurt themselves in other ways. SOme of my friends even do it. I think it's something about putting emotional pain you can't stand to feel into physical pain that is somehow bearable.

[GrayNess]

I see a few reasons why people do it:

1) They feel that for whatever reason, the world hates them or they hate themselves or someone else hates them, however, they don't want to go and actually commit suicide because something is holding them back. Perhaps it's love for someone else, fear, etc... .
2) They want attention in the form of help for whatever the issues are that they're having but they're lacking confidence or something else is holding them back from getting help. Perhaps they think they have nobody around them who they could talk to. So, the cutting is somewhat like a sign for others, however, they also tend to realize that it's something frowned on by society and abnormal, sometimes they may even be ashamed of it so they cover it up.
3) They've hurt themselves in some way and as we can all probably testify to, endorphins, enkalphins and other biochemicals are secreted that ease the pain, and to an extent, they can sometimes even make it pleasurable. However, the feeling does not last and so once it's gone, the only way to get it back is to harm again, again and again. I know it may sound somewhat odd, however, to save writing a ridiculously long post about the neurophysiological and neurochemicals involved in all this, I'll just leave it at here.

All of the above reasons are assuming that there's some thought or cognitive processes that's driving them to continue with and initiate the cutting. However, another reason, outside the realm of the premise I described above, is attention or even humour when people may find it funny to do so and so they do it to mock someone else. However, it's humans nature, that when we see someone who is injured, regardless if it's self-inflicted or not, we tend to want to help. When we see that the person is so miserable or addicted to self-inflicting damage onto themselves, we can easily figure out something isn't right with them and that it's a red flag for them requiring some intervention.

Lastly, look around in the media. You see a plethora of things but you'll also notice something, specifically with music, that pain, suicide, etc... is glorified. Some music bands have songs devoted solely to some negative emotions or suicide and what do they get as a result? A massive fan base, selling merchandise glorifying this. What this does is make it more common in society and to a point, make it more heard about and more accepted. It's still frowned upon but to a lesser degree and sadly, many people don't frown upon it, many people approve of it, such as the fan bases who cheer when their band comes on stage just to sing about how miserable life is, suicide, break-ups, etc... . People aren't sobbing about it, no, they're cheering about it. Strange world we live in.

[WantsSomsTruth]

Originally Posted by GrayNess

I see a few reasons why people do it:

1) They feel that for whatever reason, the world hates them or they hate themselves or someone else hates them, however, they don't want to go and actually commit suicide because something is holding them back. Perhaps it's love for someone else, fear, etc... .
2) They want attention in the form of help for whatever the issues are that they're having but they're lacking confidence or something else is holding them back from getting help. Perhaps they think they have nobody around them who they could talk to. So, the cutting is somewhat like a sign for others, however, they also tend to realize that it's something frowned on by society and abnormal, sometimes they may even be ashamed of it so they cover it up.
3) They've hurt themselves in some way and as we can all probably testify to, endorphins, enkalphins and other biochemicals are secreted that ease the pain, and to an extent, they can sometimes even make it pleasurable. However, the feeling does not last and so once it's gone, the only way to get it back is to harm again, again and again. I know it may sound somewhat odd, however, to save writing a ridiculously long post about the neurophysiological and neurochemicals involved in all this, I'll just leave it at here.

All of the above reasons are assuming that there's some thought or cognitive processes that's driving them to continue with and initiate the cutting. However, another reason, outside the realm of the premise I described above, is attention or even humour when people may find it funny to do so and so they do it to mock someone else. However, it's humans nature, that when we see someone who is injured, regardless if it's self-inflicted or not, we tend to want to help. When we see that the person is so miserable or addicted to self-inflicting damage onto themselves, we can easily figure out something isn't right with them and that it's a red flag for them requiring some intervention.

Lastly, look around in the media. You see a plethora of things but you'll also notice something, specifically with music, that pain, suicide, etc... is glorified. Some music bands have songs devoted solely to some negative emotions or suicide and what do they get as a result? A massive fan base, selling merchandise glorifying this. What this does is make it more common in society and to a point, make it more heard about and more accepted. It's still frowned upon but to a lesser degree and sadly, many people don't frown upon it, many people approve of it, such as the fan bases who cheer when their band comes on stage just to sing about how miserable life is, suicide, break-ups, etc... . People aren't sobbing about it, no, they're cheering about it. Strange world we live in.

I know what you mean with the whole music thing. In school, people seem to talk about their dark secrets so quickly to me. I don't mean "Oh, I'm poor" kind of secrets, think more of "I've been though abuse" kind of secret.

I don't want to know if someone's been abused years ago when I've only known them for like a day and I didn't ask them about it. It's like being in a constant state of emotion pain is a trend. Declaring that you cut yourself seems to be something you make yourself seem hardcore. That's what I've seen.

It just confuses me, what made this so big, having depressing songs being more popular than happy songs. :/

[lbms21x]

I had a friend that was a cutter. i would talk to him all the time about it cuz it wigged me out. he told me that he was hurt so much (really really bad childhood) that he really didnt feel anything pain nor feel good. when he cut he could feel the pain and see the pain he could feel something. said it was better to feel self pain then to feel like a zombie with no feelings