[stahrgeyzer]

Why is it so bad to end myself? Society and religions force people to continue on but I feel being pulled to pieces in a million directions and stressed out.

Possible trigger:

Life is too painful and I just want to let go! but I'm so afraid there is an after life. There's a constant fight in me what to do. Just so tired of thinking. IF there is some God who will have me tortured for letting go then why can't he tell me right now

[Yaowen]

I'm so very sorry you are in such a miserable situation. It is really heartbreaking. Utterly heartbreaking!

Please forgive me for asking this in your time of distress and agony, but are you in the care of a physician or mental health professional? What things have you tried?

A lot of mental health researchers and professionals have linked depression to atrophy in various regions of the brain for which treatments are available.

This research began when it was noticed that people in a very bad circumstances, such as those living in the poorest parts of equatorial Africa were able to have peace of mind of joy of living in the midst of their tragic circumstances and troubles while severe depression often struck people of fame and wealth and success.

Since I don't know you or your situation, I don't know what your circumstances are, what crushingly heavy burdens you bear. But it would be a tragedy to lose you if there were treatments that would help you.

Of course, treatments do not magically change situations. But they have helped me to see dark things in my life as challenges rather than as reasons to end my life.

Sadly I am not a crisis hotline counselor, so I do not know what to say to actually help you and I fear and dread that anything I say or anything I have written here is not helpful to you or even makes you feel worse. I was in a psychiatric hospital once and everything people said to me made me feel worse.

I hope and pray that others here, others with more knowledge, experience and insight will see your post today and respond with something helpful to you.


Does leaning on us here in these Forums help you at all? Is there anything we can do for you?

I'm deeply sorry my poor words are so poor. My heart goes out to you. And I am praying for you. I wish I knew what else to say or do!

Please call a crisis hotline immediately or go to a hospital emergency department is your depressed feelings escalate. They can help you!

[stahrgeyzer]

@Yaowen thank you very much! Your words are very helpful. I have been thinking of ways of staying here and going back to therapy but would have to sign up for medi-cal. My therapist said I need disability and feared for my life if not. So I left that therapist thinking he was wrong, but now realize he was correct.

It helps me a lot talking to people at mysupportforums. This is the only place I talk to people. I'm all for getting back to therapy and getting disability. I fear the next alter may sell our car and make us homeless.

I hope you can get help and feel better, stargazer

[Revenge Tour]

Good Morning, stahrgeyzer,

I hope this post finds you in better spirits and in better circumstances. I'm certainly not one to offer advice so I won't. What I CAN offer is a listening ear and compassion. Just watching the news and the sequence of events going on in our world I can completely understand your angst and frustration. And the possibility of homelessness is frightening. For what it's worth, I am in your corner. Your corner being that I will pray for you and simply wish nothing but peace and happiness in your life.

Just know that people care about you and, like the title of this post reads, I hope you never give up.

[stahrgeyzer]

I text one of my old therapists who gave me a number. They gave me an address to a walk in homeless place where you can sleep over night. It's in a bad area in LA. Tired of being alone in this nightmare and just want to let go. I have a 30 year old lucky bamboo plant who means the world to me, given to me by my mom. It's too much worrying how can I take care of my plant when the 100+ degree heatwaves come. My plant, Sally, is all I have. She's so old and frail. It's all just too much. I just want more than anything to let go

[Aviza]

Have you thought of relocating, signing up for section 8 or subsidized housing in Arizona or somewhere? It might give you a new lease on life.

[mote.of.soul]

Keep hanging in there stahrgeyzer, and keep searching in the places of peace for answers please. In my personal opinion, from the spiritual perspective, it's very much left up to the person to decide what to make of this/their life. That's important. And ultimately you want to live, so that's why you can't let go. Keep going friend and believe in a positive outcome despite everything.🙏

[Fuzzybear]

[farazn2202]

Giving up is a complex process influenced by various factors such as personal resilience, circumstances, support systems, and mindset. It often takes time, determination, and a shift in perspective to overcome challenges and find motivation to keep going.