[Naturefreak]

I don't feel I need to apologize for things I am not aware of but I will anyway .
I can not possibly know everyone's daily situations , and I can't possibly remember everything going on in their lives . I can't remember if you are believers or non - believers . I'm not exactly sure if you are male or female , straight or gay , or whatever.
When I post something it is not meant to harm anyone and I would appreciate it if you would PM me if you are sensitive to a certain subject . I will not take offense to it , I would really like to know as I myself care if I unnecessarily hurt someone.
I'm sure a lot of you feel the same way and it prevents you from posting . Thanks for listening

[Sabrina]

(((babysteps)))

[idontknow13]

(((((babysteps))))))
You are such a sensitive and caring person, take good care of yourself

[VickiesPath]

(((((((((((( Babysteps ))))))))))))))))

I second that!

[Pomegranate]

You have summed up my thoughts and feelings very well. It is hard to keep things all straight in my head. I can't do it for myself very often, doing it for others is even more difficult. I think, I hope, we are all aware that all of us here at PC are extra sensitive people. So I try to always step back if I start feeling offended and hope that others will do the same for me. Like you, I think most of us here want to be supportive and caring of everyone, but we each have our own "funk" and life situations to deal with, and that makes it difficult to keep the fog out of our brains. I always try to believe that each of us are doing the best we can. Thank you for voicing it, Babysteps.

[LivingMiracle]

Much Love For Baby Steps!
Your amazing!

[Indie'sOK]

((((((Babysteps)))))
I agree, I feel the same way. I truly hope I haven't offended anyone in the past.

You're a truly kind and caring person, thanks for being such a great friend

[ADHD1956]

BLESS YOU BabySteps!!!

[FooZe]

Originally Posted by Babysteps

I don't feel I need to apologize for things I am not aware of but I will anyway.

I find it feels all wrong to me to apologize for something that I'm still not clear I did -- whether on someone else's assertion that it was somehow wrong and I shouldn't have done it, or "preemptively" before anyone even objects. I prefer to start by asking what happened, and there are many possible answers:

-- That I allegedly said something that, in fact, someone else said.

-- That I must have meant something I didn't in fact mean. If I discovered I really hadn't made myself clear enough, I might very well want to apologize for that.

-- That the other person reacted in some way I wouldn't have expected them to. In that case I'd want to know more about how it had affected them and what I could do differently next time, along with apologizing for not having known it this time.

-- That the other person had standards different from mine with regard to what was and wasn't appropriate to say. Depending on what else they were willing to tell me, I might conceivably go so far as to reconsider my standards (and apologize accordingly). More likely, I'd want us to agree to disagree and if I apologized at all it would be only for refusing to give in to their view.

-- That the other person was acting in bad faith, playing "gotcha!" or something. In that case I think I'd apologize only for any errors of fact, then steer clear of that person.

I'm already pretty careful to get my facts straight (or to use appropriate weasel words when I'm not sure ). If I were being taken to task for an error of fact, before apologizing I'd want to see both where I'd gotten my version of the facts and where my questioner had gotten theirs.

... I would appreciate it if you would PM me if you are sensitive to a certain subject.

That sounds to me like a promising way to address "what happened". For the record, I don't seem to resent any point of view that someone openly presents as their point of view but I do, usually unapologetically, if they assume that they're right and that I do or must or should agree with them.

[jerrymichele]

Originally Posted by Babysteps

I don't feel I need to apologize for things I am not aware of but I will anyway .
I can not possibly know everyone's daily situations , and I can't possibly remember everything going on in their lives . I can't remember if you are believers or non - believers . I'm not exactly sure if you are male or female , straight or gay , or whatever.
When I post something it is not meant to harm anyone and I would appreciate it if you would PM me if you are sensitive to a certain subject . I will not take offense to it , I would really like to know as I myself care if I unnecessarily hurt someone.
I'm sure a lot of you feel the same way and it prevents you from posting . Thanks for listening

Same way here. (((((((((((Chris))))))))))

[Porcelain_doll_2004]

Thinking of you and sending you HUGS! and good thoughts.

[FooZe]

Hijacking your thread here, Chris

I think you and I represent opposites or near-opposites on some kind of apologizing scale. I'm not implying that either of our ways is better, only that you've chosen yours and I've chosen mine, along with whatever consequences come with each.

When I apologize what I seem to be saying, most of the time anyway, is "I didn't know any better then but I do now." When that's not true for me but I apologize anyway, I often feel as if I've put myself in a false position: I've claimed to know better now, I'm not sure I really do, so I'd better make it my job to learn before anyone catches me. If no one happens to point out that I stepped on their toes, I may be left wondering if there's something I need to know that no one's been willing to tell me.

When you apologize preemptively, it seems to me that you're saying, "Please don't think badly of me."

I'm not sure how effective a preemptive apology would be, either to keep people from thinking badly of me anyway or to make it easier for them to tell me when they do. One thing at the back of my mind, though, is that occasionally someone will show up prepared to think badly of me whether or not I actually do anything to them. Some people seem willing/able to accept blame graciously, apologize even when they don't feel at fault, and let their critics figure out for themselves where they're coming from, in the spirit of this story. I don't know if it's a hangup, a talent, or both but I prefer to get out of the way and let them address their blame to the wall behind me, as it were.

[/hijack]

[Naturefreak]

Originally Posted by Fool Zero

Hijacking your thread here, Chris

]

At the moment I couldn't care less and got so much on my mind that what I read could have been the funniest joke in the world and I wouldn't crack a smile .

[lynn09]

(((Babysteps))) - personally, not only have I never seen anything insensitive or offensive in any of your posts, I find comfort and encouragement for myself in your words even when you are replying to other people's posts. No apology necessary here, My Dear Friend ((((Babysteps)))).

[Naturefreak]

Perhaps it is a DUMB thread . Just going through a real tough time and could post a recipe for chocolate ants at the moment if I'm not careful . I think there are only two ingredients in that one , but then again I could be wrong . Have been many times before . But if I was never wrong how on earth could I be right .
Take care all while I pop another nerve pill.

[Naturefreak]

Originally Posted by lynn09

No apology necessary here, My Dear Friend ((((Babysteps)))).

Not so much of an apology thread as it is a , I'm confused at the moment thread . You don't have to pay attention to my foolishness , you just sometimes are misfortunate for having to read it .

[FooZe]

Originally Posted by Babysteps

You don't have to pay attention to my foolishness , you just sometimes are misfortunate for having to read it...

You're apologizing to a Fool -- for foolishness?!

[Naturefreak]

Originally Posted by Fool Zero

You're apologizing to a Fool -- for foolishness?!

If ZERO means nota ........... How can you be ONE ?

[FooZe]

Not just any fool, THE Fool. Note my nametag at the bottom and my number at the top:

[lynn09]

Originally Posted by Babysteps

Not so much of an apology thread as it is a , I'm confused at the moment thread . You don't have to pay attention to my foolishness , you just sometimes are misfortunate for having to read it .

Confusion and foolishness - no problemo. You should read MY latest meltdown! On second thought - DON'T! It wouldn't be good for you- just understand that you are not alone in being confused and foolish. Love ya, anyway!

[Naturefreak]

Originally Posted by lynn09

Confusion and foolishness - no problemo. You should read MY latest meltdown! On second thought - DON'T! It wouldn't be good for you- just understand that you are not alone in being confused and foolish. Love ya, anyway!

I never meant for you to AGREE with me Lynn .
Thanks alot .

[Rachie]

You are a very kind and loving person babysteps and i dont think you could ever offend anyone. I hope your sadness and confusion disappears soon my dear friend much love

[lynn09]

Originally Posted by Babysteps

I never meant for you to AGREE with me Lynn .
Thanks alot .

Even if it's NOT you, and I'm the one who is confused and foolish - I still love ya, anyway. And, Yes - I am perfectly capable of simultaneously laughing and crying hysterically while babble-typing - it's a gift.

[Rmdctc]

I do agree as far as not everyone can remember what everyone is doing. I do hope though that you continue posting and dont take it personaly.