[turquoisesea]

I feel really ripped of by a lot of things.

I think I may have made the wrong choice in colleges. I WANTED to go abroad, I wanted to study several things, I wanted to explore new things I hadn't learned yet.

Boy was I wrong to choose music performance. This school said that they offer a wide variety of electives and that you can study abroad. But it's not true. The classes I've wanted to take have been barred from me because orchestra (required) or music history (required) etc get in the way every single semester!

I have to take a leave of absense for mental health reasons, and then they treat me not as a person any more.

I am almost 2 years behind.

My degree doesn't mean much in the professional world.

I've learned nothing of these broad things except that I want to learn more.


I really wish I had gone to another school. Someplace I could explore these interests and have friends rather than sitting in a practice room all day "not" learning theory (because it was review for 4 semesters but they refused to place me out of it) and not being able to take hte classes I WANT to because they're either scheduling conflicts or "for majors only".

I'm sick of htis school but I have another 2 years left in it.

Many people change schools to find a better fit.

[perpetuallysad]

Byzantine is correct. I would try another school. I'm sorry it is so frustrating for you right now. I know it used to drive me nuts when my schedule would conflict and I couldn't take a class!

[Elysium]

(((((Turquoise)))))

It's not to late to turn this into what you want. The others are right. Find a better school, with a better program that suites your goals.

There's really no need for you to be miserable for the next two years. Lots of people do this and it's nothing to feel poorly about.

Maybe start doing some online research on schools and see what else would be available to you.

[turquoisesea]

One problem with switching schools is that we've spent so much money into this one. It's one of the "best" schools in the field for the United States. My parents are invested in it. I'm invested in my teacher but hate the school so i"m confused.

What would you guys look for in a school?

Do you think it would be worth spending 4 years to get a different degree than 2 years to finish this one?

[(JD)]

Originally Posted by turquoisesea

I feel really ripped of by a lot of things.

I think I may have made the wrong choice in colleges. I WANTED to go abroad, I wanted to study several things, I wanted to explore new things I hadn't learned yet.

Boy was I wrong to choose music performance. This school said that they offer a wide variety of electives and that you can study abroad. But it's not true. The classes I've wanted to take have been barred from me because orchestra (required) or music history (required) etc get in the way every single semester!

I have to take a leave of absense for mental health reasons, and then they treat me not as a person any more.

I am almost 2 years behind.

My degree doesn't mean much in the professional world.

I've learned nothing of these broad things except that I want to learn more.


I really wish I had gone to another school. Someplace I could explore these interests and have friends rather than sitting in a practice room all day "not" learning theory (because it was review for 4 semesters but they refused to place me out of it) and not being able to take hte classes I WANT to because they're either scheduling conflicts or "for majors only".

I'm sick of htis school but I have another 2 years left in it.

This is a miserable place to be emotionally! (Maybe physically too?)
Can you advocate for yourself, or do you have someone who will?
It would be good to sit down and discuss these issues with someone at the college, someone who has the ability to make things right and give you credit or change courses. Make sure you have written out what you want.

Tell them you feel ripped off, if you must. Do you have any of the original paperwork or college handbook that says all those wonderful alluring promises? Take it with you. If they truly have not provided what they said, then they might just see the issue clearly.

Stay nice (sometimes it's difficult) and speak to them as adults do...attack the problem and not the people etc. Make sure you have your demands clear in your own mind, which I am not sure you do have right now.

You may need accommodations to continue at this college. Don't be afraid to ask for them if you see no other recourse or bending by the college (OR if you are comfortable asking.)

Take a realistic look at things: the first 2 years of any college are usually general education required courses. How many of them do you have? Those are always transferable. Are you building on a bachelor degree? There are always electives available, maybe move some of your courses into that area, so they don't harm your overall efforts.

Good wishes!

[perpetuallysad]

I would say that if you want to do something else it is definitely worth spending four more years working on it. What's the point of having a degree in something you aren't happy with? I know, I know some people just use a degree for the jobs it will bring, but I am romantic and think you should go to school for what you love (which is why my degree is in English). If you can move to another school where you would be happy then do it, you only live once and you don't want to regret this forever. Just because a school is "the best" and expensive doesn't mean its the best for you. I went to an all women's university and I LOVED IT. There were really small classes and the professors were wonderful people. I can quite honestly say it was the happiest time in my entire life. I just felt like I belonged there. I think when you find the right school you will feel the same way. (Yes, sorry, I'm being so sappy!)

[sanityseeker]

Meet with an academic advisor and research your options including transferability of the course credits you have already earned. Since your parents are funding your education you might want to involve them in the research to make sure they are on side and support your decisions. Meanwhile make the most of the classes you are now taking.

Another good idea I recommend to students is to consider what you want from your education in terms of preparing you for particular professions. Don't limit it to one. Then seek out people in those professions and interview them. Ask them about their job to see if it is a fit for you and ask them about their educational qualifications. This is often a real eye opening exercise that can also give you more confidence with your own decision making.

Good luck.

[lonegael]

Good posts! I would transfer. I have been in numerous programs where what I was intreseted in was dropped just as my year started, or cut down to invisibility to make room for another focus. It's never too late, actually, to go back and change focus, but don't let false "loyalty " trap you into staying. That you invested in the program means that THEY are indebted to YOU; YOU DON*T owe them to STAY!!!!! Hugs dear and I hope you find a solution that brings you some satisfaction.

[Perna]

If I were in your shoes, I'd finish the two years and then explore what having a good degree could do in that field. If it is the best school then it's likely that the other schools would not teach you what you want to know either. That may not come until you've had the basics for a zillion years.

I have two degrees; I changed my major in my senior year the first time and graduated with another degree in 1972 and did not get the degree I originally went to school for until 2007. There's plenty of time to explore all the things you want to explore. But it could be that some of them turn out not to be like you thought they would and not as interesting to you and you expected they would be.

[birdcrazy]

I don't know about my decision... they were offering me free tuition at my hometown college, but instead I went to a big university and in debt.... I mean, people said it's better to get a degree from a well-known school so it's recognized more... but at what cost?

Also since I was mentally disabled since I was a little kid, someone told me I should have gotten special scholarships or something for that... I dunno.

[Beholden]

"That you invested in the program means that THEY are indebted to YOU; YOU DON*T owe them to STAY!!!!"

That is one of the things that stuck out for me in all the above posts.

Do your parents support you in what you want? Are you living their dream for you?

Or are they invested in you graduation from a well known/status type college?

Would they support you if you changed degrees/schools?

Now, what is it you want? How do you see yourself ten years from now?

Just a music degree or a career in music?

What would a trip abroad do for you?

Just a trip abroad? An escape or to really learn something you can't learn here?

What is it you want to learn that you aren't learning now? Is is really scheduling problems/all the practice time spent alone/or conflict of some sort that is keeping you feeling ripped off? Could some of it be issues with mental illness and how long it took you to get through 2 years of education? I really sense your frustration and wish I could just wave my magic wand for you. It took me forever (8 years) to get just a 2 year degree. I went to school mostly evening classes after I was in my late 30's, two classes at a time. I loved my time spent learning new things. In my last 40's I went to a one year massage school.....loved it. So you need to know what you want. You'll always get older, so why not do what you want now and have no regretes?

What would it take for you to not feel ripped off?

Now, I have a friend whose husband was going to be a classical musician while he was in college. He changed his degree because he realized that he would have to be the very best in his field inorder to earn a living for the rest of his life. So he became a teacher. He still uses music in his life, still plays instruments, teaches his children music. Actually he is most likely retired and collecting a pension now. But he realized early on that music/practicing to be the best all the time ... just wasn't something he was willing to spend the rest of his life doing.

Don't know if any of this is helpful, but I wish you peace of mind in making your decisions. Good luck.

[StarTrekker]

Turq, I graduated with a degree in Music Therapy in 2007. I COMPLETELY understand you when you write about the frustrations of wanting to study abroad, but having to stay in the practice room or take music theory(what is the point of music theory beyond scales and chords?) or worse-- SIGHT SINGING!!!!
I have several friends who graduated with a music performance degree, BUT they also made sure to get certified to teach so that yes they can play for the symphony here, but they can also teach private lessons and ask for much more money than a music ed major.
Take heart! Life knows where it wants to take you.