[Indie'sOK]

I started today thinking it would be pretty much uneventful, and it was, except for one thing. Today during gym class, a girl that I don't like cut her finger. Her friend, another person I am not fond of, said to her "what, are you a cutter?" jokingly and they laughed about it. I have a problem when anybody jokes around with SI like this, because it refers to the stigma that we all hate so much. I, without thinking, said to the girl, "don't joke around with stuff like that because it isn't funny". They started in on me, and we're saying stuff back and forth. I remember saying something like "well that shows how pathetic you are" and she said something like "yeah I guess it does" all sarcastically. Again, without thinking, I looked down at the roll of tape in my hand, and threw it at the girl They start freaking out, go to the office to talk to the principal. I get upset, can't believe what I just did, and I go too. After talking with him, the principal said that standing up for myself is fine, but this situation didn't warrant that because they weren't actually bullying me. I told him that I stand up for stuff like this because it has such a heavy stigma and I want to help get rid of that. I ended up making up with the girl, but I know they still talk about me because of this. I just wish I wouldn't let my emotions get out of control. Whenever I land myself in the office for something like this, I end up crying. I hate it. I feel weak because of it, and pathetic. There are some things I could have said to that girl that would make more of an impact than what I did, but when the adrenaline is coursing through my body like it was here, I just couldn't think of what I wanted to say. I wanted to hurt her with my words. She said to me "I've never done anything to you". I said "Oh really? What about in fifth grade when you spread rumors about me?" She laughed because, come on, fifth grade?! Of course they don't get it. She doesn't and the principal won't. They don't understand the effect bullying has on a person, how it stays with you, even though they say they do. I feel guilty about what I did, but I don't regret standing up for what I believe in. I just wish I hadn't cried.

[Typo]

((((((((((((((Indiesoul)))))))))))))))))))

You should feel good for standing up to yourself, I really understand how you feel I often found myself in situations like this in high school, were I would be so passionate and feel so strongly I let my anger and emotion dominate the situation, I was teased a lot in high school and was pushed to the point at times I absloultey lost my temper (I have a horrible temper when it comes out) I found the best way was to stop a minute and take a deep breathe, and remind myself their words, what they say, have no meaning to me, their actions are not my responsiblity, and has hard as it is, some people just never learn, which is very sad...

I argued against what they said with facts and with as much compusre as possible, when I realized their only goal was to ruffle my feathers I turned my back on them and walked away..(that really irks people into silence I've learned)

I"m sorry you had to go through that, and that the princpal didn't udnerstand,

I'm always here if you need to talk, pm anytime dear

Love
Typo

[Junerain]

I would not feel 'weak' for crying in a situation like this

Crying is healthy.

And that is one hard situation

I personally am glad you fought stigma a bit!!! It NEEDS to be fought!!

PM me anytime

[sadden]

Junerain is right about the crying. Crying happens. You did a brave and strong thing to confront a wrong that you saw. I admire that.

[sanityseeker]

I cry on a dime. Crying now. Its a stress reliever for one thing. I am not in a good place today but Indie girl you hold a very special place in my heart so I want to try to post something for you. You are so precious in this world. Your tender heart of passion and compassion.... you give me hope that love and kindness exists.

Wanted to share something with you about tears. I read somewhere that tears are a gift. Collected in a precious crystal bottle by the angels and taken to the creator as evidence of the great one's love living in the hearts of those who seek justice and goodness in the world.

you are gifted Indi with a heart for justice and goodness.

[Indie'sOK]

Thank you everyone Sanityseeker, that means more to me than you will know. Thank you so much