Nowheretorun posted an excellent video down in the Video Forum. I know not all members visit there but thought some might like to watch it.

http://forums.psychcentral.com/showt...12#post1042112

[nowheretorun]

ty for adding the link Orange.. this is something i hope we all become involved in.. our community health depends greatly on co-operation, understanding, and kindness towards one another

it can effect us all..
Its a great thread ((nowheretorun )) and ((orange))))
I do not want to make it about me. The only way I can impress that it
happens to adults is to do so. Sorry.
As with kids when it happened to me i thought at first it would go
away. I thought answering back would somehow stop it.
It does not. I did not believe the person , which looking back was
dumb of me. It should have been reported right away.
But with anything on the net its so hard to prove.
I did keep everything , right down to making hard copys.
I received e mails this person used from other ppls e mails. Threatening ones.
I did block everyone. This person was so good at it . I had a old
comp. They some how got into my comp.
Even knew when i doubled clicked as it was posted so. NOT on here did
this happen.
They moved into my comp. ...... that comp did not last long.
This is not to make you feel paranoid , but to help you see it can be
real. Never give out your name. Or address, or phone #
unless you are forsure you know this person. Even then handle with care.
I was naive and believed none of this could ever happen to me.
I want you to know this same person did it to not only me either.
It went on for about 4 years at least, It went so far as this person
posted pictures that were altered.
Visited my friends, got public info on me. Linked my biz to not good things.
Im not going to give to many details as that would not be smart of me.
I did not take it serious to begin with. So i felt it was sorta my fault.
I am only posting this so you know how much i care.
It came to a real awareness to me when on one Christmas eve I had the
troopers. Sheff's and a PI and lawyers in my biz trying to help me.
This person came out of the comp and into real life.
As i have said before it altered my life and my kids forever.
Mine mostly.,
It did not happen here please know that.

be safe be kind be healthy towards one another

((( Muffy )))

Your experience was just horrible. I can't imagine how terrifying that was.

My experience wasn't that bad and it also took place on another site, not here.

Mine started out "simple" if there is such a thing as far as stalking goes. I had a "vibe" about this person and would not give them my personal email address or my real name. This person became obsessed and infuriated over it and harrassed me about it everyday. Then they found out that I had given my email addy to someone else and the verbal assaults became vicious.

I blocked them. I changed my email addy. I did all the things I thought were the right things to do but still this person was able to track me down.

It was a game to them. And the harder I made it for them to "find" me, the harder they tried.

I withdrew from any web site participation for well over a year. I had to stop contact with my friends from that other site because the person started harrassing them to try and get to me. It was awful. I'm still hypervigilant over it. Always looking over my shoulder.

All because I wouldn't give someone my email address.

I know some of you feel bad that I turned my PM's off and that I made the conscious decision to not accept any of the "friend request thingies," but I'm so paranoid it will happen again that I do that for my own self protection. It really isn't anything personal towards you and I'm sorry if your feelings ever got hurt because of it. That was never my intention.

Keep safe and follow your instincts.

((((orange)))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Yours is just as bad , My friend, Anytime that happens any of it well my heart goes out to you.
It is a game to these ppl. Thats the sad part.
I withdrew too. AS i had to and you did too.
You did all the right things. You still are . Im so sorry that happened to you.
That over the shoulder feeling , i not sure it ever goes away.
You have not hurt anyone here,. You have protected yourself which is the correct thing.
My one friend went to a stalking help site, This person found her there.
Luckly she could prove it .

You my friend are very right on
((Keep safe and follow your instincts))))

Be carefull who you give your phone number too it has backfired on me twice ! I should of learned I guess I am dumb...

[nowheretorun]

it takes all of us being involved to prevent cyberbullying, or bullying in our 3d worlds.. we need to band together in support of preventing the spread of bullies in our neighborhoods and internet homes...

these groups have organized and invade websites in numbers, hiding behind multiple i.d.'s, taunting and goading unsuspecting members into flaming type arguments... they seed the website with negative thoughts and harmful messages and imagery...

by attacking someones positive statements they are trying to cause chaotic environemtns and prevent healthy communication within the website community...

share with each other what your feelings are about this.. create a safety net and do not interact with these people, the outcome can be deadly! report the problem and distance yourself... when you react to them you are stepping into the trap.. dont think that you can handle it alone, they are organized and not healthy for you or themselves! thanks to everyone for helping with this ongoing predicament we all face in the cyberworld daily.. you're co-operation and input helps us all

As in the vid its says the best thing to do is not respond
and report it

Interesting read about wolves in sheep's clothing. (FYI only -- muffy -- our PC sheep -- only wears her own wool. Ever. She is a sheep through and through.)

The article is not just about stalking. It discusses people pretending to be something they are not. Dangerous stuff if you are getting advice from someone who claims they are a lawyer (or cop or whatever) when in fact they are not.

http://www.baddteddy.com/stalkers/stalker.htm

(((orange)))))))))))))))))))) Its a great site ((ty)) for saying i am a good sheep.
But maybe not a smart sheep or lamb what ever i may be

When It happened to me I trusted ppl I should not have. Gave info to ppl i thought were my friends as this site says. One turned out to be the one feeding the stalker.
Can not say enough . Never give out your phone #. address. or email unless you really know them. Do not give out personal info unless you are 100% sure.

I took this part out of your link.

I realized before the Internet ever came into being that stalkers (the less courageous ones), would flock to the Internet. That they would be looking for easy prey. That some of them would disguise themselves by using names designed to make you think they were good people. Innocent people. That they would change identities (names) frequently. Hide behind fake email accounts (Sheep's clothing), and harass the innocent (sheep).

[nowheretorun]

everyone knows muffy is a lamb lol mistreatment of another human will never bring peace of mind.... it's guaranteed to bring on another heartache tho... (((everyone)))))

[Catherine2]

this is a good Heads Up!

add me to the list of those who trust too much...

Mine was 98% taken care of by the work of a friend of mine who is a retired police officer. His efforts combined with others put my stalker behind bars--twice. It turned out that I was not the only one he was stalking, either.
It was of no comfort to me that I was not his only prey.

**It was not on PC**

The other 2%? The residual fear and that old familiar feeling of taking the blame/shame...

Catherine

[Zen888]

I don't know if this has been mentioned already in previous replies to this thread but I think it is worth mentioning.

Online/Internet dating websites!

I know that some ppl have met wonderful ppl through Internet dating websites and similar sites. But it has been my own experience that has left me very cautious about who I talk to on the Internet and to never try meeting someone for romance.

(FYI I am female)

I have met men from Internet dating websites that are how do I put this delicately.....strange!

The words that describe them would include: only wanting friends with benefits, uneducated, liars, .... list goes on!

99.9% of the time the men lied about themselves and what they were looking for in a relationship. They treated the first date like a financial arrangement and would talk openly about sexual matters and desires.

And you have to pay alot of money to interact with ppl on the Internet dating websites in order to make contact (exhange e-mail and other personal information). It's not worth the heart ache, mind games, and expense to find a potential partner for romance.

Most of the men I met were only wanting to be special friends and nothing more.
________________

This reply wasn't intended to bash men in anyway it was just to give a heads up to some not all of the men you may encounter on Internet dating websites. I apologize if I have offended anyone.

found this on the news today
John Walsh Leads Teens in Discussion of Sexting and Cyberbullying at Cox's National Summit on Internet and Wireless Safety

http://communication-solutions.tmcne...22/4237530.htm

[Maven]

I've not used an online dating site, but I've heard a lot of people lie on them, males and females. Some say it is so that if you don't look good, you won't recognize him/her, and he/she can sneak away. But I seriously don't get it, because once the person meets you, they'll know what you look like. If you lied, they may reject you right away, because that's no way to start a relationship.

As for social networking sites, I see people giving away sensitive information all the time. Teens probably do it most, but I see A LOT of adults who do it, too. They post the school they go to, where they work, places they're going (or sometimes a friend will comment something like, "See you at Such-n-Such tonight!"), etc., which makes it easier to find them. I was looking for a friend on MySpace yesterday, and one of the search results that came up told me of a girl who works at a local grocery store (she named it), and she posted her photo. That makes her really easy to find.

Sometimes I think of messaging people that do that, but I think it would backfire. People would probably tell me to f*** off or tell me they don't really think it's a big deal.

A lot of teen girls post cheerleading photos from school (or their friends might post photos of events that included them), and that can help someone intent on harming one of them know what school they attend, and know that they're on a team that might stay late at school for practice, etc.

I just finished this book called " Please stop laughing at me" By Jodee Blanco
at the end she lists some really good sites to get help if bullyed online or off
www.ncpc,org

www.kidspeace.org
teen site www.teencentral.net
for if you need help

www.bullying.co.uk

it was a great book that gave me great insite.
shes a wonderful person imo and wants ppl safe online and off

It has happened to me too, but in an odd way. I met a group of people from a mental health site (not this one) who I thought were my friends. (was I ever wrong) Well one person started to use my username to reply to other member's blogs and stuff and they said really mean thing to others in my name, and now people think I am guilty of things I didn't do or say. I was totally sabotaged. There is no way to prove it and when I tried to talk about it on the site, I got blocked for making someone feel put down because I mentioned how I was being lied about. I can't even defend the lies being told about me and some people will believe what they want to. During the meetings I heard outright lies about others and it made me feel bad to even be a part of that group. What is really bad is the people who think I hurt them, I don't even know what all was said or to who.

So I no longer want to attend these get togethers because I saw too many people stabbing each other in the back while pretending to be their friend. Then that behavior came on the message boards. I am glad I am no longer a part of that mental health site. So I guess this is like cyber bulling if they are using your identity to spread hate to others. But to me it shows how mentally unstable they are to use someone elses name to cause problems with others and just to hurt that person's reputation. It makes me sad that this happens. Reminds me of high school and I guess some will never grow up.

(((((exoticflower))))))))))))))))))))) Im so sorry that happened to you. Im glad you kept yourself safe and left the other site.
Thats the smart thing to do. And yes thats called cyber bullying.
your right it is a sad thing, but it happens.
your are also right its like a new wave of high school at times.

Some important things to know , And I know you prolly know them .
Do not give out your name and address or phone # unless you know them along time
if bullyed do not answer back , if you can help it
Most important .report it.

tc of you and know you are important kind one

Thanks Muffy,

I learned my lesson that is for sure so no matter how close I might get to someone, I am not going to give out my name or meet them in person. It will be like the old fashioned days where people had friendships through writing letters. It can still be a close relationship, but a safer one for all involved. I think it is good to have all kinds of friendships and people from PC knows what we are going through because someone out there shares some of the same issues.
I know I shouldn't compare sites but it seems like there is a lot more understanding here of different disorders, especially PTSD and survivors of abuse. This site is actually amazing on the compassion and support we give each other. It will be hard not to want to meet those I get close to here, but after I have been "burnt" I don't want to go there again.

((((exoticflower))))))))) Pc is a wonderful site you are right.
and most understanding I i agree. The old saying most of us "have been there done that" is so true
As far as learning your lesson it was one I had to learn too. Not from here but before in my life
and I do think it follows thru not only online but IRL

[nowheretorun]

you all are great may all be safe

((nowheretorun))))) your great too and ((everyone))) I agree may everyone be safe
IRL and on the net

[nowheretorun]

thanks again to all who have added to this thread and have the good will to consider the health of our community at PC and IRL... this article may pertain to some of the material mentiooned so far... remember.... self protection is an important part of individual and community health!

Avoid unhealthy influences in your life
At a time of year when most people are being relentlessly positive and talking about what they want to do next year, let’s go against the grain and talk about what we don’t want to do: hang out with bad people.

http://lifewithsoul.com/2008/12/stop...essful-people/

great link (((nowheretorun))))
"Be careful whom you spend your time with. Unhealthy influences pervade the world. Learn to recognise them and steer clear of them – your success in life depends on it"
taken from the link

I found this on cnn this morning .....good info imo
http://money.cnn.com/2009/09/16/tech...ion=2009091613