[BlueFaith]

I have had a bad disagreement with my mother in law today. This woman hates the very air I breathe. Here's the story behind it... I apologize ahead of time if this is a little lengthy. She let me and my husband (her son) borrow $50 for a radiator for my car today. He just started a new job a couple of weeks ago, and he doesn't get paid for another 9 days. We agreed to give the money back when he gets paid. She babysat our 3 kids while we were gone to have my car fixed. Well, my mother in law lives with her daughter...my husbands sister, and she picks up her 2 kids from school every day at 3. So, she had to leave my house by 2. Understandable. It was getting closer to the time for her to leave and they still hadn't finished fixing my car, so I decided to leave my husband to drive my car back home, and I would take the car we drove there to get back home with my kids. That way his mother could go ahead and leave. Well, when I got home she was furious for some reason. No one had done anything to her! She was just angry at the world for some unknown cause. Needless to say, she was mean and rude to me for no apparent reason. She seemed angry that she had let us borrow 50 bucks. So I assured her that she would get it back soon. Keep in mind that she just borrowed 20 from me last week and never even offered to pay it back. But, anyway, she kept on running her mouth until I just couldn't take any more from her. I told her that if she hated giving us money that badly then just not to do it anymore. Simple, right? She didn't like that. So she decides to ask me why MY parents cant help me when I need money (which isn't often at all). Well my dad is disabled and hasn't been able to work now for over a year. He's about to have a leg amputated due to diabetes. My mother does all she can to take care of him. My mother in law knows this, but she told me that my parents are SORRY because they cannot help me financially. That was a low blow. Totally uncalled for in my opinion. See, my mother in law had nothing to do with any of her children as they were growing up. She GAVE her own son (my husband) to a neighbor when he was about 4. The neighbor raised him. And her other 2 children are just now starting to forgive her for putting them through hell as children as well. I just got SO mad that I told her to get out of my house and dont come back until she can act better. I told her that I would mail her money back to her even though she never pays me back when I give her money. She also went as far as to say that she didn't even care if she ever saw my children again either (I have 3). I have a daughter that is disabled as some of you already know. She has surgeries alot. And my mom in law said that she doesn't care to know the next time my daughter is ill.... or any of the rest of my kids for that matter. So, all in all she called my parents sorry and told me that she doesn't want to have anything to do with my children no matter what. I think I have a right to be angry. I have a bad temper anyway, and it took all I had to just not knock her socks off. But I am already on probation for something STUPID that happened 2 years ago before I was diagnosed with bipolar and put on meds. I am dealing much better now. But I am still very hurt and VERY angry about this whole thing. My husband and I have been married since I was 19... that's been nearly 7 years now. And we were dating since I was 17. So she's had ALOT of time to stop acting like a moron to me. I don't know what her problem is. What should I do?? Any advice is appreciated. Sorry this is so long!!!

[January]

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I had more than my share of probs with my ex mil, and I am so sorry you are going through this. It sounds like you did the right thing. You stood your ground, offered the sensible solutions to her complaints, put her in her place and asked her to leave. Some people just beg to be ignored!

I hope someone else has something more constructive to offer, but I think you did a good job under most trying circumstances. Again, I'm so sorry she is putting you and your family through this.

Hugs,

Jan

[misty]

What ever you do, do not depend on inlaws for nothing. Just my opinion. Giving them money is not so wise in my opinion either.

[kimmydawn]

i'm so sorry that happened. how horrible.

what should you do? nothing. it's already done, and sounds like you did it very well. the only thing you should do now is to follow thru with keeping her out of your house.

well done.

kd

[misty]

do not borrow any more money from her. Even without it they seem to own you. I try to make good with mother in law but she only sees her son as perfect and there is no getting around that. I just go around her if I am up to it any more. If not I do not which is most times. I hate it but it is better than going around her with her rude comments.