I'm going DOWN HILL

omg i am!

i cut two weeks ago for the first time in 8 months, i dont take my meds,i have been hallucinating (hearing thiings sometimes),my moods have been ALL OVER LIKE YOU COULDNT BELIEVE (Angry, Sad, Happy,Confused), i have been feeling like a different person, my ADD is getting WORSE and the only thing works is Strattera and my liver levels were high on that,i want to throw up on purpose AGAIN,i literally want to beat myself up, racing thoughts,anxiety is high,im anxious, and i am having paranoia AGAIN... AND hospitalizations do NOT work for me...what the hell do i do!?!??!!?!?!?!

deb

Debs, im not sure how to help. It seems things are bad. You say you dont take your meds, is this whats made it so bad at the moment. Maybe you might want to take them again, I dont know if that would help.

ATG

Hi Deb, so sorry to hear that youre not doing well. My first suggestion to you would to be to start taking your meds again. I spiral downward when i stop taking mine too, so i can relate. If you feel the need to talk to someone you can always PM me.

ehhh who knows, they dont really work for me anyways....i took it this morning, but i still feel the same...idk

Hi,

Please call your pdoc asap. You need some extra help. Hon, your meds can't help you if you won't take them. If you didn't need them, your Dr. wouldn't prescribe them. Please make that call.

My very best to you,

Jan

Perhaps you should talk to your Doc about changing your meds? It took me 10 meds before i finally found the right combination that worked for me?

ehhhhhh, ive been on 14 different meds, NONE of them really work for me......sucks

deb

Well like i said before, 10 times was a charm for me. When your depressed and feeling down, it may not seem like its worth it, but in the long run, if you can find the right med, its worth the effort.

Please reconsider going back to the DR , ok?

okay lol i will

Great

>>.i took it this morning, but i still feel the same.

The meds for these illnesses won't have any effect after one dose. They have to be taken regularly, on schedule, every day, to build up a level for 4 to 6 weeks before they can be of any help. If they are not helping, other medications or combinations of medications should be tried. Your doc should help you understand and help you through this while finding something that will help you. Even with the meds it takes a lot of hard work and therapy to feel better. Meds just "set the stage" so to speak in order to allow healing to occur.

You say that hospitalizations "don't work" have you had a bad experience in the hospital? Different hospitals have different types of programs, so maybe you can find another with a program more to your needs. When I was hospitalized, it was a very intensive program with group and individual therapy scheduled all day long. It was very difficult but also very helpful.

It is also important to understand the purpose of the hospital... they are not intended to "cure" you and you may not be feeling much better when you get out then when you went in... that's not really possible for a 1 or 2 week hospital stay when the medications take 4 to 6 weeks to work.

The hospital is supposed to help you get stable on your medication and to give you some skills to help you cope through the recovery process. There should be a discharge plan in place when you leave the hospital, usually a partial hospital program or at the very least regular followup with a doctor and therapist, and that is where the real recovery takes place, over time. It takes a lot of hard work and effort but it is worth it to be able to take back control of your life and to feel better.

Best of luck DP. And welcome to the forums. Support is also a very important ingredient to recovery.

awwww, thanks for the info...

the hospitals i were in were four winds, and new york presberterian. nyp did nothing...noo therapy and four winds is basically just to have fun activities. lol. i dunno...

I say try something else... sounds like those facilities didn't cover your needs. No therapy doesn't sound like a constructive situation at all. There can be some fun forms of therapy, like art therapy, but that should only be a part of the program. Therapy requires work on the patient's part... it isn't like they talk, you listen, and you get better.

I think it is very likely that having no meds is why you are having all of these difficulties. I think the best thing that you probably need to do is contact your pdoc or find another pdoc and let him know what is going on. If that first med was causing liver problems for you the pdoc should work to find something else to work. There are lots of different meds available now, it may take some work and patience to find the right one, one that is effective and doesn't give you bad or dangerous side effects. But until you addess that I don't think you can expect things to get better, probably only worse.

Please continue to post here for support, but contacting your pdoc should be a priority for this. Good luck DP