[Maven]

My boyfriend told me, that by definition, I am crazy. I have panic disorder and obsessive compulsive disorder. I have always thought "crazy" is defined as someone who is violent or aggressive, especially someone who can't tell reality from fantasy. I don't think everyone with a mental illness falls into this category. What do you all think?

[Sunna]

It's his definition of crazy.
Not your definition of crazy.

And I am reading a book by a psychologist named Arno Gruen titled "The Insanity of Normality". He makes a very good case that what passes for "normality" is really insanity, and in fact the better "adjusted" person appears to be the more insane they really are. So there.

[sunsetsunrise]

Hi Maven, I think that when someone calls another person "crazy" its a judgement. One that serves no constructive purpose. If he saw someone with a physical challenge would he be judgemental toward them? If not, then why would he be judgemental about a psychological condition?

For some, it seems acceptable to demean people who have psychological challenges. Yet it is understood that people with physical challenges should never be demeaned. The conditions we find ourselves grappling with is in no way a reflection of our strength. So to answer your question
No, I do not think you are crazy at all. But I too have been called crazy. And it hurt. .

[Maven]

Thanks. I was wondering what others thought. I find it diminishing, because if you're "crazy," then people dismiss your opinions and beliefs and put you in a lower class.

[sunsetsunrise]

Originally Posted by Maven

Thanks. I was wondering what others thought. I find it diminishing, because if you're "crazy," then people dismiss your opinions and beliefs and put you in a lower class.

Yes. And that is the opposite of being supportive, I think.

[Open Eyes]

No Maven,

Crazy1. Affected with madness;insane. 2. informal. Departing from proportion or moderation, expecially. a. Possessed by enthusiasm or excitement : The crowd at the game went crazy. b. Intensely involved or preoccupied: is crazy about cars and racing. d. Foolish or impractical; senseless: a crazy scheme for making quick money.

I am crazy about horses and animals, does that make me insane?

We can all be foolish and impractical.

Anyone can be intensely preoccupied with something.

Anyone can depart from moderation, too many chocolates, too much ice cream, too many pairs of shoes.

I am sure that your bf is crazy too.

We can all be crazy, otherwise life would be dull.

So don't let it bother you.

Open Eyes

"Panic disorder" and "obsessive compulsive disorder" are diagnostic classifications of mental disorders that are officially part of the DSM system. Some argue that use of mental "disorders" rather than mental "illnesses" is for political correctness but many professionals disagree for various reasons.

There are dictionaries that define "crazy" as a noun: someone who is mentally ill. See, for example: http://www.macmillandictionary.com/d...zy_11#crazy_15

As you state, I expect most people think of "crazy" in the context of someone who is a loony, looney, nutcase, weirdo -- (someone deranged and possibly dangerous). http://poets.notredame.ac.jp/cgi-bin/wn

Your boyfriend is being somewhat disingenuous in your case by making his point. He seems rather mean-spirited.

[gma45]

He sounds insensitive to your diagnosis. I would rather be crazy than insensitive!

[Maven]

It really surprised me when he said that, because believe it or not, he's pretty supportive of me. He stated it as a fact, not to be hurtful, I think, but he tends to not "get it" when he states certain beliefs and "facts." He lent some money to my cousin, never having met her (and I haven't seen her since I was a kid), and now my mom's on his side about everything, too.

[Inedible]

Originally Posted by Maven

My boyfriend told me, that by definition, I am crazy. I have panic disorder and obsessive compulsive disorder. I have always thought "crazy" is defined as someone who is violent or aggressive, especially someone who can't tell reality from fantasy. I don't think everyone with a mental illness falls into this category. What do you all think?

Do you think you could get him to go in somewhere and get tested - the MMPI - on a dare or something? It may well be that he has psychiatric conditions of his own that have yet to be diagnosed. From what I have observed, especially with the pressure of current economic conditions, I would conclude that just about everyone could use psychiatric help. Whether he is really just stating facts (and everyone's facts are really just opinions anyway) or intending to be hurtful, if he really sees himself as above it all he can prove it. The more certain people are of their mental health the more I tend not to believe it.

[beauflow]

I'm sorry but I have to say this: "We are all crazy in our own little ways" we are humans, and that is not trying to make it a judgment or being disrespectful... just we all even the "normal people" have things that others may consider "crazy"....
Best wishes

[Sunna]

It's good that he did not mean it as a putdown. And you know what? Lending someone he's never met money, now, that's crazy, sweet, but crazy... lol

[Fuzzybear]

[Lifelines]

Originally Posted by Maven

My boyfriend told me, that by definition, I am crazy. I have panic disorder and obsessive compulsive disorder. I have always thought "crazy" is defined as someone who is violent or aggressive, especially someone who can't tell reality from fantasy. I don't think everyone with a mental illness falls into this category. What do you all think?

Telling you that you're 'crazy' is very simplistic and just a put-down. I have experienced panic attacks and obsessive compulsive disorder myself and know what it's like. What you need is compassion and undestanding not dismissal. The panic disorder is a tough one to crack but you can get a handle on obsessive-compulsive. Just try, each time you feel that compulsion to do something (with me it was touching everything several times) to ask yourself 'what will happen to me if I don't do (whatever it is)? I won't die or get sick. Nothing bad will happen.

At first it might not work but it's a question of training your mind to change its way of thinking. You can do it. In the meantime tell your boyfriend to read up on the issues that are facing you before making stupid criticisms. If he really loves / likes you he'll get the message.

[Maven]

Originally Posted by Inedible

Do you think you could get him to go in somewhere and get tested - the MMPI - on a dare or something?

I doubt he'd do it, but you're right...he could almost assuredly be diagnosed with something. I would guess depression, at least.

[Maven]

Originally Posted by Lifelines

The panic disorder is a tough one to crack but you can get a handle on obsessive-compulsive. Just try, each time you feel that compulsion to do something (with me it was touching everything several times) to ask yourself 'what will happen to me if I don't do (whatever it is)? I won't die or get sick. Nothing bad will happen.

Thanks for your full comment, but regarding this, it won't work for me, because I don't know what I'm afraid of. I don't think I'll get sick or die, I just feel like I can't touch some things because something will be on me and I can't handle that. Like dust, oil from a person's body, etc. I know these won't hurt me, but somehow, I can't get myself to feel comfortable touching or being exposed to these things.

[venusss]

Originally Posted by Maven

I doubt he'd do it, but you're right...he could almost assuredly be diagnosed with something. I would guess depression, at least.

everzbodz who breathers can be slapped a label on these days... because we live in crazy, crazy world.

[Perna]

Tell him that by definition he's an insensitive a__h__e

[BeyondBlue]

I've felt like I was crazy, maybe I am.

[ladyjrnlist]

It's just a word. Retarted used to be OK to use and now isn't. Crazy is being replaced with mentally ill. It's just perspective and who wants to put a negative connotation on what word.

[venusss]

Originally Posted by ladyjrnlist

It's just a word. Retarted used to be OK to use and now isn't. Crazy is being replaced with mentally ill. It's just perspective and who wants to put a negative connotation on what word.

i actually see crazy better than mentally ill... crazy can be used as a possitve. you see t-shirts that say "crazy". have yet to see somebody to walk with "mentally ill" written on their chest. people go out for crazy night, when you fall in love with somebody you are crazy for them...

crazy can be a temporary thing too... you have a crazy though or idea. you do a crazy thing. MI is somehow more deep and permanent.

after all/... see my signature

[shikantaza]

Originally Posted by Maven

My boyfriend told me, that by definition, I am crazy. I have panic disorder and obsessive compulsive disorder. I have always thought "crazy" is defined as someone who is violent or aggressive, especially someone who can't tell reality from fantasy. I don't think everyone with a mental illness falls into this category. What do you all think?

Oh my goodness. LOL

There is a psychological phenomena called "projection" that comes out of our sub-conscious shadow (see Carl Jung). I would suggest you look it up. Your boyfriend is stating his own insecurities and fears and projecting them on to you. Understand that it is his "fears" and his "shame" he believes about himself. He wonders if he is crazy but is to insecure to accept his deepest inner fears.

Your okay, and remember that we're all crazy, that is the human condition.

Peace